Beach Party
by Gryffindor Hot Shot
Summary: I bring you the adventure of Alexia, Xio, and Chelsea as they cross the space time continuum to a era where pirates ruled the seas. Join them as they entice a Blacksmith, terrorize a grown Pirate, and give the Governor's Daughter a run for her money.
1. The Greatest Fall of All

Hello POTC lovers please enjoy this story of nautical terms, sexy pirates, and sailing to places that cannot be found expect by those who already know where it is. This will include most characters from the movie, and others included me, my sister, and my neighbor Chelsea.

However much I've wished and prayed **I DO NOT OWN PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN**. _'kay_? Whoa that rhymed...

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Chelsea: 5 4" Dirty blonde hair, with sun kissed skin for a white girl, very skinny, 14.

Xio: 5 3" Dark brown hair that's bone straight, emo style with bangs across the face, thick square glasses, natural yellow tan, 16 years old.

Me: 5 4" Dark brown hair, wavy and layered, with natural darker tan, thick purple plastic glasses, and 15.

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This was going to be one of the best weekends the summer could have possibly supplied. Xio and Alexia's parents had gone to visit family and left their children at their privately owned beach house for a few days. There was a car left for them in case of an emergency, some cash, and plenty of snack foods. Of course all their other friends, expect for their neighbor Chelsea, were an hour away so instead of a party they spent the day at the beach. Then they settled on the couch on a large patio outside and decided to watch some of their favorite movies. PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN! The Curse of the Black Pearl and Dead Man's Chest, back to back!

So Alexia pulled the Capri's Suns out of the fridge as Xio, as in a C and an O, attempted to put movie in and Chelsea stood on the porch wringing out her hair.

"Man the waves are pounding. There must be a storm coming in," She stretched in her bathing suit. Chelsea was the classic tanned, blonde haired, blue eyed girl. Quite literally the girl next door. She jumped onto the couch poking Xio with her toe.

"Come on Alexia! I can't figure this GODFORSAKEN thing out!" Xio yelled. She was technologically challenged, even when it came to plugging her bass's amp into the wall correctly.

Alexia shook her head. If Xio were anyone else, maybe Chelsea's idiot boyfriend Shane and close friend, she'd tell her to shove it. But Alexia could see she was indeed struggling. Her head blocked the view of the DVD as she pushed button after button.

"God damnit!" She screamed, slamming the tray with her hand until the DVD holder closed.

"YAY!"

And just like that, they all jumped up and down on the couch, in their bathing suits and shorts dancing for their lives. Alexia stopped to brush hair aside that kept poking her in the eye because the salt water made it turn curly again. The opening music for The Curse of the Black Pearl was pretty loud as Chelsea turned up the volume grinning idiotically. They all jumped at the same time, making the couch fall back and off the deck, with them coming down with it. Chelsea screamed like a little girl and Xio letting out a stream of curses but Alexia couldn't see a thing. That was, until her back hit the sand and the sun bleached everything out.

"Dude, what the crap?!" Alexia yelled sitting up and looked around. Xio and Chelsea sat next scanning the beach too. There was something very wrong about this scene. The dirty mud colored waters of their state's sea was now the clearest of blues. They heard sounds like a blacksmith's hammer hitting the anvil and the smell of fresh bread hung heavily under their noses, mixing with the salty brine of the sea air. They were suddenly sitting in the shade of palm tree.

"Wait, where'd the house go and where the hell are we? We certainly can't afford to lose it." Xio asked getting up and dusting her butt off.

"Oh my GOD!" Chelsea yelped jumping up and pointing until Xio promptly smacked her in the back of the head.

"Out with it man!" she said raising her hand to smack her again but Chelsea ducked away.

"Wait, look! We're in Port Royal. Right Alexia?" She gave her a confused look. When Xio took in her surroundings, her mouth fell open.

"Are you kidding ME?!" she screamed sinking to the ground, her hands clasped together, "Thank you BABY JESUS!"

"Indeed we are, but MAN!" Alexia said angrily, kicking the sand. Xio gave her a weird look.

"Of all the movies to get sucked into, why couldn't we get sucked into a cool vampires vs. werewolves movie with Hugh Jackman!"

Xio nodded sympathetically. Chelsea looked like she about have a heart attack.

"Gotcha Bitch! I'm just kidding. Come on, let's go find us a sexy, old enough to be our dad, pirate." Alexia grinned evilly while doing a happy shoulder shimmy.

"Who's that?" Chelsea asked, earning herself another smack from Xio.

"Ya just couldn't afford to waste it. Huh Chelsea?" Alexia asked laughing.

"Not a real pirates fan I can see." Xio said sarcastically, poking her friend in ribs to show she was joking.

"Yes let's go see Captain Jack Sparrow!" Alexia grabbed a stick from the sand and pointed it forward.

"TALLY HO MATES!!" and they all started running down the beach and towards the docks.

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There it is. Short, Sweet and to the Point. Please hold your applause until the end it's more proper that way.


	2. Divide and Conquer

Another part for my peeps in the reading world. This includes some stealing because need I remind you that our characters are wearing bathing suits and shorts not appropriate wear for this time period. That and Eunuchs that represent my friends Shane and Will or Shay and Bill. Sorry about all the stuff in between. Don't worry Will's up next.

**Don't Forget I Do Not Own Pirates Of The Caribbean.**

Oh and by the way I love to steal things. Not to mention I'm pretty good at it. Like a professional pick pocketer. Cool huh?

* * *

Xio, Chelsea, and Alexia were now hiding out in some underbrush near the docks watching and waiting like lions stalking their prey.

"Why don't we just go and find him?" Chelsea whined for the third time.

"How about you go prancing about in shorts and a bikini top," Xio snarled and Alexia laughed. Something caught her eye though: a group of guy's skinny dipping in the shallows.

"Hey look! A bunch of eunuchs!" Alexia pointed to the guys and then their pile of abandoned clothes.

"They'll do for now, come on!" Xio started toward the pile of clothes. Chelsea was staring at the sky, it was still sunrise.

"Hey Alexia, I have a plan." She looked at Alexia then up the road to Elizabeth's Manor.

"Hey Bill! Those ladies stole our clothes!" A young black haired boy yelled up the shore, pointing at us.

"Do something Shay! I'm bloomin' naked here mate!" A lanky blonde haired boy yelled, covering his privates. The other boys shouted angrily but also ducked down.

"Shut yer yella bellied trappers yeh eunuchs!" Xio shouted back and pulled Chelsea along, who was ogling the naked boy dubbed Shay.

"Ha ha! Pirate talk." Chelsea giggled and Xio smacked her again.

After they stole the clothes and ran like insane homeless people from the naked boys, they donned on the brown breeches, thick white cotton shirts, dark brown boots, and brown belts to keep the big pants on.

"Aww, Lexy this sucks! Everything's too big!" Chelsea whined. Xio nodded in agreement while holding her pants to keep them up.

"Fine, here, have some money and buy some clothes in town," Alexia held out a bag of coins that contained the stolen money of all the boys. Xio and Chelsea stared at the full pouch with wide eyes.

"Where'd you get that?" Xio asked grabbing the bag and inspecting a large bronze coin.

"Stole it. Anyway Chelsea, what's your plan," Alexia said grabbing the pouch back and giving her and Xio some.

"Oh yeah. Well, since we're here we need to keep track of all the characters. So we should spilt up and watch all the characters, then meet up again. Right?" Chelsea concluded.

"Cool! DIBS ON JACK!" Alexia screamed raising her hand.

"Fine! DIBS ON WILL!" Xio screamed angrily since she couldn't have Jack.

"So I'm stuck with Elizabeth," Chelsea said sadly. Alexia wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

"It's okay Chelsea. You can steal some of her stuff when she's not looking, okay?" She smiled and Xio nudged her with her elbow.

"Come on, hands in," They all put their hands in.

"Okay. One, two, three!" They all shared wickedly crazy smiles and then...

"WHERE THE KOOL AID AT!" They screamed and headed off towards town to buy form fitting clothes.

* * *

"How about this?" Chelsea asked spinning around in a lavender colour dress with matching corset and free white lace fan.

"I think its GAY! The homosexual kind too, not the happy go lucky kind," Xio said examining her finger nails and smiled evilly as Chelsea's face fell. She was the only one who wanted and had to wear a dress. Alexia stood next to her in the mirror.

"I think it looks good but only because your going to be Elizabeth's maid," Chelsea smiled because she knew when they got on the Black Pearl she would change into pants and a shirt.

"Thanks Alexia," but Alexia wasn't paying attention. She was examining her outfit. She had black breeches, a white cotton shirt, black boots, and a purple sash wrapped around her waist. Her hair had turned curly from her swim and the salt water made it stay frizzy free. Xio had the same outfit; only her breeches and boots were all lined with emeralds the size of a nickel and for the same price. When asked why she had the emeralds she replied…

"Because pirates have to have Bling!" she smiled and tied her hair back with an emerald green bandana.

"Come on! Let's get going, we're late. Now remember Chelsea, you have to be Elizabeth's maid. Go anywhere with her, okay?" Alexia pointed threateningly at her. When Chelsea nodded she moved her finger to Xio.

"And Xio, you're to follow Will by any means necessary okay?" Xio nodded.

"Great, let's get this adventure started!" and with that Alexia made her way to the docks, Chelsea to Elizabeth's Manor, and Xio to the Black Smith's work shop.

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I'll have more soon since I have nothing to do really. Read and Review.


	3. Meeting the Eunuch

Hey guys here's some fun with Will Turner and bad mouthed Xio. Wonder what's going to happened, all I know is it can't be good. Because sometimes my sister can be the spawn of the devil in a normal girl shell. If you know a few people like that then you know what I'm talking about. There's actually a book called devilish or cupcake or something that is about devil's right hand woman walking the earth. Crazy, right?

**I DO NOT OWN PIRATES!** How many times can I tell ya? Huh? I love you all and guess what?... wait I forgot.

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Xio crouched down on the stone stoop leading up to the tall wooden door of the black smith's workshop with a hairpin in hand. She was trying, and failing, to break in before Jack and Alexia got there. She really didn't want to deal with the pretty boy, aka William Turner, at this moment. She wanted to go with Jack! Even Elizabeth was a better pirate than Will, and he was supposed to be half.

"I haven't got time for this. Stupid lock." Xio mumbled as she jammed the hairpin into the lock. She stopped suddenly when she heard Will's voice beyond her, humming some unknown tune. Quick as a flash, she took the hairpin out just as Will himself walked up behind her.

"Who are you?" Will Turner asked, looking down at her.

"Oh, um… Hello. My name is Xio. I was wondering if you could help me." Xio curtsied to seem less threatening. Not that she was, after all, she was 16 and a lot shorter than him. Plus, he was an excellent swordsman. He raised an eyebrow at her, taking in her whole appearance, but moved aside to let her in.

"You're not so tall." She said crossing her arms and walking in. The smell of mildew and burning wood met her nose and she frowned. She smiled though as she looked around, taking in the furnace and the mechanical machine Will had made to hold all his swords as they cooled.

"Very nice swords." She said turning around to take all of them in. She had started fingering a rather long double-edged one when Will suddenly grabbed her upper arm.

"I'm sorry but this is no place for a young lady such as yourself." He tried to pull her towards the door.

"What if my name was Elizabeth?" She asked mockingly. She stuck her tongue out and bit it playfully at him. He glared at her.

"How dare you speak of Miss Swann in such a way? I will have to ask you to leave now." He wasn't asking though. He was forcibly steering her to the door.

"Get off you stupid eunuch! I swear if you lay another hand on me I will hog tie you and make sure you _stay_ a eunuch for the rest of your miserable LIFE!" She screamed, yanking her arm away and examining some swords near her again. She seemed calmer now that she was free. Will wasn't about to try that again. Judging by her clothes and wild hair with beads in it, this was not the person he wanted to mess with. She was no regular young lady. Her clothes suggested piracy but Will couldn't be sure. She looked too young for such things.

"Um, well Ceil, I need to make a delivery and you need to go home. Okay?" He walked across the room and picked up the Governors' order off his workbench. Xio, who was choosing to ignore his mispronunciation of her name and his comment, was picking out a sword for herself.

"Well Will, can I have this one?" She said holding up a perfectly aligned cutlass with emeralds threaded in the handle. She gave him her best puppy dog pout but Will looked extremely doubtful. She was already quite dangerous without a sword. Giving her one might be a mistake.

"How do you know my name?" He asked in an attempt to avoid conflict.

"Oh, I know a lot more than that Mr. William Turner." She walked slowly closer to him, making him back up until he hit the wall. She leaned up against him so their faces were inches apart.

"Like the fact that you are in love with Elizabeth Swann and you met her when you were ship wrecked. Only after being shipwrecked did you notice that you were missing something, something very valuable that your father had given you. But believe me; it's closer than you think." She winked at him, spun away, and proceeded to hide her sword so she could find it later when Will and Jack were busy sword fighting.

"Come on then, can't keep the Governor waiting…or his beautiful daughter." She shook her hips suggestively at Elizabeth's name and turned to look at him.

"Right?" Will's mouth had fallen open during her little speech.

"How do you know all those things about me?" Will asked walking closer to her, his fingers out stretched to grab her arm again.

"I'll tell you more if you let me come with you. And don't even think of grabbing my arm again," Xio smiled sweetly at him and snatched the box he was holding.

"Now let's go. I can't even imagine how Chelsea's feeling, even with this lot I've got to tend to." She shot Will a look he ignored. She followed Will to the manor as he tried to coax more information out of her.

"Tell me more Ceil." Xio smirked, enjoying this feeling of holding something over him.

"First of all, my name is XIO. Like a C and an O. Now you try." She motioned for Will to give it a go, making sure to make him feel like a toddler in the process.

He gave her an ugly look and said," Xio. Fine, easy enough, but why are you here?"

"My God, do you ever shut up? I bet Elizabeth's a hell of a lot better to be around. At least she's a good pirate." She mumbled the last bit so Will wouldn't hear but that didn't deter him from asking more ignored questions. Only when Elizabeth's Manor loomed out in front of them did he finally shut his mouth. He even stood a little taller, straightening his posture. He cleared his throat and held his hand out for the box.

"I need that now. Please." He added after getting a suspicious look from Xio. He moved to grab it but she turned away to block him.

"The only way you get it back is if I get to go inside." She fixed him with glare that rang with finality. He had no choice but to agree.

"Fine. You must stop following me after this though." He said weary as Xio lovingly put the box in his arms. She shot him a dirty look.

"That's not part of the deal." She walked haughtily up the steps and banged on the door.

"SWORD DELIEVERY!" She yelled as the doorman appeared in front of her. His powdered wig made her stare for a second before shaking her head.

"Yes, do come in." He said politely. He gave Xio an odd look as she sauntered over the threshold with Will behind her.

"I dare say, I'm a bit too young for you to be staring at me in such a way, don't you think Will?" She said loudly enough for other servants to stare appalled at the butler. He blushed blotchy red on his pale cheeks and looked away.

"Miss Xio, you're clothes are not what most young ladies wear these days. He can't help but notice." Will said setting the box down on the table and turning to look at her. She shrugged.

"Yes, but I'm no ordinary young lady for my age, now am I?" She winked at Will, who rolled his eyes as she turned back to the older gentleman.

"Sorry about that there mate." She held a hand out to the butler but he turned on his heel and hurried away.

"Hey, I'm a load cleaner than this here lot!" She jerked her thumb back at Will who looked deeply offended.

"Excuse me?" Will asked outraged as more servants walking by held their noses. Xio sighed.

"Mate, you smell funny." He pointed to his chest and she nodded. He sniffed his armpits and she rolled her eyes. Where on earth was Chelsea? She couldn't much deal with this any longer unless throttling pretty boy was in her near future.

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Don't cha just love being blunt and telling it like it is. That's my personality in a nut shell. Oh don't forget to review!


	4. Wet Dreams

This is where it gets interesting. Chelsea gets into the Manor to tend to the Princess when what do you know? Xio comes over for a visit with Will. And you would not believe the conversation they have. Alexia and your favorite Captain are up next. Best believe it'll be crazy. YAY!

**I don't own Pirates kay?**

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Chelsea ran up the road to the Swann Manor, dodging several coaches going by. She held up her dress stiffly, her lips pursed at the idea of hanging out with Elizabeth for the rest of the day. Sure she was a good pirate. But she still killed Jack. The really hot pirate in the movie. Sometimes looks conquered actions. Or at least in her world they did. She finally climbed the steps and knocked on the door loudly.

"MAID DELIVERY SERVICE!" Chelsea screamed happily and held out a bag when a white wigged, stiff nosed butler opened the door. He looked down slightly confused at her. Her smile faltered but she smiled wide again and shook the bag.

"Candy sir?" She said smiling. He stared at her.

"Are you the new maid?" He asked politely holding out his hand. She cocked her eyebrow at him and shook her head.

"Uh, of course! Yeah, I'm here for the maid job. Can't you tell?" She dropped the bag and spun around in her dress. He laughed at her.

"Of course my lady. Come right in." He moved aside and gestured for her to enter. Chelsea walked happily into the large colonial house. The ceiling was high with a large curving staircase that Elizabeth would come down later. She looked up at the crystal chandelier hanging above her head.

"If you will Miss…?"

"Scott." Chelsea said over her shoulder without taking her eyes off the chandelier. "How much do you think you could sell that for?"

He looked up at it, back at her, at the chandelier, then back at her with suspicious eyes.

"Uh, just kidding." She laughed, trying to sound innocent.

"This way to the maid's station then." He said, indicating she should follow while giving her odd looks. He led her down the long hallways and off into a small side room with brooms and other things for cleaning. Chelsea cringed. It smelled like bleach. She usually didn't clean anything, mostly tricking her sister into such things.

"Estrella will be back in a few moments, I'm sure of it." He said smiling and walked off. Chelsea walked around the room and saw a small ring on a table. She picked it up, inspected the sapphire in it, and popped it in her pocket.

"Hello!" A short, plump woman with a round face said happily as she came in. Chelsea jumped; sure she'd been caught stealing from her.

"Oh, hello! Didn't hear ya coming!" Chelsea said jumpily. She smiled nervously.

"I'll need your help waking the Governor's daughter. We need to help her change and clean her room. Best hop to it then!" She said cheerfully and walked out. Chelsea rolled her eyes, tired of all the damn British talk, and followed Estrella up the stairs to Elizabeth's room. The Governor was already there, banging away.

"Elizabeth!"

"Hold on now." Chelsea interrupted. "Let me get that for you."

She began banging louder than him, drawing scandalized looks, "WAKE UP IN THERE PRINCESS! RISE AND FRIGGIN' SHINE LUV!"

They could hear shuffling from inside, Elizabeth probably hurriedly throwing on her robe and hiding the necklace. The Governor stared and opened the door.

"Still at bed at this hour?" The Governor said walking towards the windows. Chelsea and Estrella opened them grandly, blinding everyone in the room.

"Hmm, beautiful day. I have a gift for you." Chelsea stared out the window, taking in the view as the sound of bells from the harbor floated in and seagulls cawing. Estrella held out the box containing a dress for Elizabeth.

"Aww, it's beautiful." Elizabeth cooed as she pulled it out. Chelsea snorted.

"Such a wanker." Chelsea muttered under her breath, Estrella gave her a disapproving look for snorting.

"Isn't it?" The Governor said, she looked happily at it and suddenly turned on him, looking suspicious.

"May I inquire as to the occasion?"

"Does a father need an occasion to dote upon his daughter?" She seemed accepting with this answer and went behind a screen to change. Estrella gestured for Chelsea to help her change and she scowled, disgusted, but moved forward to help her pull her dress off. Estrella threw it over the screen and pulled the other new dress down.

"Actually," He looked down at his boots, "I had hoped you would wear it to the ceremony today."

"The ceremony?"

"Captain Norrington's promotion ceremony," Elizabeth leaned out from behind the screen to glare at her father.

"I knew it." She scoffed.

"Commodore Norrington, as he's about to become." The Governor said proudly, swaggering his head like a peacock.

"Fine gentleman don't you think. He fancy's you, you know?" Elizabeth sucked in her breath loudly as Chelsea held her front and Estrella pulled the corset tighter. Elizabeth gasped. Her father looked at the screen concerned.

"Elizabeth? How's it coming?" He asked.

"It's difficult to say."

"I'm told that it's the latest fashion in London."

"Well women in London must have learned not to breathe!" She struggled to say as Estrella tightened the corset again. Chelsea had to turn away so Elizabeth couldn't see her smiling. The butler entered the room looking rather bored.

"You have visitors Sir." He said in a monotone voice.

Chelsea squealed and knocked over a pitch of water that had been resting on Elizabeth's bedside table, spilling it everywhere.

"Oh fudge buckets! I'll go get some more. Sorry!" She said dropping down some towels on the puddle and grabbed the pitcher. Estrella just shook her head as she finished helping Elizabeth get dressed. Chelsea stuck her tongue out at Estrella and followed the Governor down the stairs.

* * *

Will was inspecting a knobby light extending out of the wall while Xio looked at a painting on the wall, trying to figure out if is was a large woman holding a naked baby or a whale beside an iceberg. Funny how unsimilar those things were until someone painted them with an inexperienced hand.

_Thunk!_

Xio spun around, having forgotten that Will broke that lamp off at this part.

"You idiot!" She hissed, snatching it out of his hand and throwing it in the umbrella holder. She smiled innocently at another butler passing by.

"Ah, Mr. Turner, good to see you again." The Governor said walking down the steps.

"Good day sir." Will said politely. Xio jumped and waved at Chelsea who'd been following the Governor closely. "I have your order."

Will put the box on a table and proceeded to pull out the sword and bow slightly as he handed it to the Governor. Xio and Chelsea stood closely, whispering to each other.

"How are things?" Xio whispered, eyeing the Governor as he handled the sword.

"Okay, of course. I guess I'll knock out the fat maid and come along with Lizzie for a nice boat ride." Chelsea muttered, pretending to dust the top of a drawer.

"Perfectly balanced." Will said and the girl's focus was on the two men again. Xio grinned evilly. "The tang is nearly the full length of the blade."

"Don't drop it!" Xio shouted suddenly. Will turned, looking at her and so did the Governor.

"I haven't done anything yet." He said confused.

"My mistake." She said smiling until she turned back to Chelsea who was now dying in a fit of giggles. Will did his little sword trick and handed it to the Governor, as the two ignored their conversation. Chelsea pushed up towards him.

"Oh Will, that really was great. Very awesome. Maybe you could show me how to do it sometime." Chelsea said, raising an eyebrow at him. He threw Xio a look. She shrugged.

"Oh Elizabeth, you look absolutely stunning!" The Governor exclaimed at the clacking of Elizabeth's heels on the stairwell.

"Will!" She said hurrying down. Chelsea mimed vomiting into the umbrella stand while Xio stuffed her fist into her mouth to stop from laughing out loud. "It's so good to see you!"

"I had a dream about you last night!" She said, her father looked slightly put off.

"_A wet dream_?" Xio muttered under her breath and Chelsea tried to shush her giggles.

"About me?" Will sounded surprised.

"_No, Jack_." Xio whispered, raising her eyes to the roof. Chelsea was being absurdly loud with her giggles now.

"That's not entirely proper for you to-"

"_Not proper at all_." Xio rambled in a southern drawl.

"About the day we met, remember?" Elizabeth said smiling.

"How could I forget, Miss Swann."

"Really," Xio said loud enough so her voice carried, "how could he?"

Chelsea was only being held up by the drawer at this point as she continued to wipe down the same, spotless spot over and over.

"Is that a friend of yours?" She said, looking over at Xio grinning. Will threw an extremely ugly look at her.

"Oh no Miss Swann, she's a servant girl that sends messages and packages." He said crossly.

"Oh Will," Elizabeth continued, "How many times must I ask you to call me Elizabeth?"

"At least once more Miss Swann, as always ." Xio and Chelsea rolled their eyes simultaneously.

"There, see. At least the boy as a sense of propriety. Now, we really must be going. Thank you." The Governor snatched up the sword's box and rushed out the door.

"Good day, Mr. Turner." Elizabeth said with a little coldness in it. She too went out the door and Will followed, hanging out after her.

"Good day-" He began.

"Elizabeth." Xio and Chelsea chimed in with him. He turned and looked at them.

"What?" They both said and started laughing again. Will turned on Xio, glaring down at her.

"You have to go home now." He said sternly. Xio laughed, a mocking tinkling laugh that Chelsea immediately joined in on. After a few seconds they abruptly stopped.

"I'll be goin' with you young William. And me mate here." Chelsea waved enthusiastically, almost hitting Xio in the head. She smacked her hand angrily away.

"I haven't got time for this!" Will said throwing his hands up. They both glared at him, long and hard, until he sighed in defeat.

"Fine. Let's get going." He turned, slouched over, and led the way back to the black smith's workshop.

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Review please and I'll get you some Mac and Cheese over the Internet. Just as so as I get the whole space time continuum thing figured out.


	5. Oh Captian, My Captian!

Alexia meets the infamous Jack Sparrow at the docks and the harassment ensues. Includes some well disserved weird looks, disrespect, and a lovely tune from Van Morrison. Oh and not to mention a very good Jack Sparrow impression that I occasionally do at school in my English class. I had to stop though when Mrs. White said she'd write me up for drinking and coming to school. Foolish what some people think huh?

**I DO NOT OWN PIRATES if I did the story would be so fucked up.**

* * *

Alexia walked down towards the docks to wait for good old Jack. She walked past the Dock Manager and sat on the edge, letting her feet swing freely. She looked out and saw Jack standing proudly at the crow's nest of Ana Marie's sinking ship or dingy. She laughed, how could he still look so cool on a sinking dingy?

"Cause he's Captain Jack Sparrow, savvy." Alexia said to herself. He was still a little ways off so Alexia sat staring off into space singing a song her mom had on her Ipod.

"_Standin' in the sunlight laughin', Hiding behind a rainbows walls, Slipping and a sliding, all along the water fall_," Alexia sang as everyone started to notice Jack and his sinking dingy, which stopped right in front of Alexia but she kept singing.

"_With you, my brown eyed girl, you my brown eyed girl. Do you remember when we used to sing..._" Alexia looked up at Jack and he looked down at her.

"Excuse me darlin' but I got to get past ye," he said side stepping her but as she grabbed his boot. He fell flat on his face as Alexia stood, now towering over him.

"You interrupted my song Jack," she smiled innocently.

"_We used to sing. Sha la-la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la-ti-da, Sha la-la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la-ti-da La-ti-da_," she bent down and offered Jack a hand still singing.

"You've got to be more careful luv," Alexia said helping Jack up, he looked rather angry and confused.

"How didcha know who I was luv?" he asked walking down the dock behind her, eyeing her suspiciously.

"Tell ya in a minute," she said as the dock manager walked up, nose held so high in the air, she wondered how he saw the clipboard in hand, with his servant boy in tow.

"Hey you! It's a shilling to tie up your boat at the dock," At this Jack looked back at the sunken boat while the manager shrugged.

"And I shall need to know your name." The manager flipped a page on his logbook, ready to put down Jack's name. Jack raised an eyebrow at the man.

"What do ya say to three shillings and we forget the name?" Jack slipped three shillings into the logbook and smiled. The man looked at Jack, the money, back at Jack, and shut the book with a loud crack.

"Well Welcome to Port Royal Mr. Smith and Miss…?"

"Sosa, if you will," Alexia said but the man just gave her an odd look and walked off with little black boy tailing him.

"Rude much? What is with people and staring?" Alexia said following Jack as he walked over to the manager's money pouch, shook it and placed it his pocket.

"Jack, it's not nice to steal," Alexia said holding up the pouch of money. Jack looked dumbfounded.

"How did yeh get that? And the name's Captain Jack to you luv," he said trying to snatch the pouch back.

"Shove it Captain," Alexia fired back, pocketing the pouch without another word.

"A young lady such as ya self should respect her Captain," Jack said, hand inching towards his cutlass but Alexia grabbed it first and held it out of his reach.

"And men such as your self should learn to never trust young ladies with super ninja skills," Alexia said sheathing his sword as Jack watch her cautiously.

"Ye not a normal one are ya?" Jack asked heading toward the Interceptor while Alexia followed him humming her song.

"Sorry Jack but not even close," with that she began singing again. Jack gave her a sideways glance.

"So ya goin follo' me everywhere?" he ask as we walked down the dock to the Interceptor.

"Alittle," Alexia made a half and half motion with her hand.

"I've got to met up with my sister late after the sword fight. Why got a problem with me Jack?"

"Captain please, CAPTAIN," he replied very annoyed by Alexia calling him Jack.

"Why Captain, Jack? You don't even have a ship ever since Barbossa mutinied against ya. That must have sucked big time for you and now you only have three more years or so to spend sometime on your love the Black Pearl before Davy Jones comes lookin for ya!" Alexia laughed at Jack's bewildered face.

"Luv would ya care to explain how ya found all that out," Jack stopped and looked her square in the eye. Alexia just walked past him still humming.

"All in good time Jack," she said walking right past Murtogg and Mullroy without even noticing.

"Hey Hey! This dock is off limits to civilians!" Murtogg said as both soldiers stood blocking Alexia's way.

"Terribly sorry, I didn't know. If I see one I shall inform you immediately." She said doing her best impression of Jack, which was actually pretty good considering the endless hours she'd spent watching this movie. She had the right amount of swagger and hand motions. Jack stepped in and started talking but since Alexia had seen this part a dozen times she quietly sang to her self again.

"_Hey where did we go, days when the rains came? Down in the hollow, playin' a new game."_

"Apparently there's some High tone and fancy to do at the fort, eh? How could it be that two upstanding gentlemen such as yourself did not merit an invitation?" Jack made a pained face at the mere idea of not being invited.

"_Laughing' and a runnin', hey hey, Skippin' and a jumpin',"_

"Someone has to make sure this dock stays off limits to civilians," Mullroy said stupidly. Alexia rolled her eyes but decided to stay out of the conversation. For now.

"_In the misty morning fog, with our hearts a thumpin', And you, my brown eyed girl, you, my brown eyed girl._" Alexia sang quietly, trying to stay calm and not laugh at these bumbling idiots.

"It's a fine goal, I'm sure, but it seems to me that a ship," Jack moved to his left to point out the Dauntless and the soldiers moved with him, "like that makes this a bit superfluous really."

"Ah the Dauntless is the power in these waters sure enough but there's no ship that can match the Interceptor for speed."

"I've heard of one. Suppose be very fast, none catchable." He paused for dramatic effect. "The Black Pearl."

Murtogg laughed," There's no _real _ship that can match the Interceptor."

Mullroy turned to glare at him. "The Black Pearl is a real ship."

"I agree with skinny over here not Fatty McButter panties," Alexia said pointing at Mullroy who smiled and then at Murtogg who gave her a nasty look.

Murtogg turned to look sarcastically at Mullroy. "Nah, no it's not."

"Yes it is. I've seen it."

"You've seen it?"

"Yes."

"So have I." Alexia butted in and Jack gave her a look for interrupting the twos distracting fight.

"You haven't seen it." He threw her a glance. "Neither has she."

"Yes I have!" They both shouted at once and Jack elbowed Alexia in the ribs, she barded her teeth at him.

"You've seen a ship with black sails, that's crewed by the damned and captained by a man so evil hell itself spat him back out?" Murtogg asked, his voice completely serious, as he looked at the confused Mullroy.

"No."

"No." He turned to Jack who nodded, looking unconcerned.

"But I have seen a ship with black sails."

"Oh. And no ship that's not crewed by the damned and captained by a man so evil that hell itself spat him back out," Jack grabbed Alexia's arm and led her slowly away while they argued to the Interceptor, "-could possibly have black sails therefore couldn't possibly be any other ship but the Black Pearl? It' that what your saying?" Murtogg said ridiculously fast.

Mullroy nodded, smiling and said, "No."

"Like I said, there no _real _ship that can match the Interceptor..." Mullroy and Murtogg looked around but Jack and Alexia were already on board.

"Hey! You!" They ran up and pointed their muskets at Jack who was behind the wheel.

"Get away from there!"

"You haven't got permission to be aboard there mate!"

Alexia drew her sword quickly and pointed it at them threateningly.

"Stand down." Jack commanded. Alexia looked back at him, slightly confused, but he gave her a significant look and she put her sword back in its sheath.

"I'm sorry, it's-it's such a pretty boat. Ship." He added quickly when they raised their muskets higher.

"What's your name then?"

"Smith!" Jack piped up. "Or Smitty, if you like."

"I love Smitty." Alexia said dreamily. Jack looked at her funny.

"What's your business in Port Royal, Mr. Smith?" Murtogg asked, making sure to make his voice as disbelieving as possible while saying his name.

"And no lies!" Jack and Alexia shared at look. Jack shrugged.

"All right then." He walked out from behind the giant wheel. "I confess. It is my intention to commandeer one of these ships, pick up a crew in Tortuga, raid, pillage, plunder, and other wise pilfer my weasely black guts out."

"I said no lies!" Mullroy shouted angrily.

Murtogg paused, confused, "I think he's telling the truth."

"Funny, he does that often enough." Alexia said leaning on the ships wheel, looking chill.

"If he was telling the truth, he wouldn't have told us."

"Unless of course, he knew you wouldn't believe the truth even if he told it to you." Alexia said and started to dance to the song she had been singing earlier. Jack stared at her.

"I was going to say that there mate." Murtogg and Mullroy watched as Alexia calmed down and sat on the edge of the ship. She looked up at Jack with wide baby eyes.

"Jack tell me a story!" she wailed grabbing his jacket and putting him down to sit with her.

"Umm okay it's about this island I traveled to with all these crazy inhabitants," he began and stopped as Alexia gave Mullroy and Murtogg her best stone cold glare. When they were sitting listening to the tale too she turned back to Jack.

"Go ahead Jack," she pressed and looked up at the fort. Chelsea and Elizabeth should be making their entrances soon, Alexia thought as Jack continued his story.

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Review and go make your own STORIES TOO! Then when you're done, come read the rest of mine.


	6. Advice Created By The Superior Girl Mind

Well, well it's time for Lizzie girl's fall and for Alexia to get the hell outta dodge before she gets arrested along with Jack. This chapter shows that Alexia has taken six years of swim lessons, is brave enough to steal Jack's infamous hat, and smarter than the average girl by far. Hmm... very interesting, Sword fights up next!

**I don't own Pirates, wish I did though. I would have totally had a Pirates themed sweet sixteen. But my mom said kidnapping is a federal crime so...**

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This part of the movie was Alexia's dream come true, even since _Miss Swann_ had killed Jack in DMC. Other than that, Lizzie was a great pirate and a good at using people. She could see Commodore Norrington and Elizabeth talking and could imagine their conversation.

"You look lovely Elizabeth." The Commodore would say as Elizabeth gave him a strained smile and went back to fanning herself like crazy.

"I apologize if I seem forward," this being the Commodore's cue to stand away from Elizabeth and stare out at Port Royal, "but I must speak my mind."

Stumbling over his words, he would continue, "This promotion throws into shock relief, that which I have not yet achieved."

The Commodore would turn suddenly to look at Elizabeth, who is dieing of heat and restricted airways, "A marriage to a fine woman. You have become a fine woman Elizabeth."

"I can't breathe." Elizabeth would choke out right before she fell.

The Commodore, of course, turned around again and missing the whole scene. Silly Rabbit! Elizabeth meant she really couldn't breathe and not because you ask her to marry you! Alexia thought as her eyes followed the falling body of Elizabeth. She turned back to Jack just in time to hear the end of his story.

"And then they made me their chief." Jack said to Murtogg and Mullroy, who had been sucked into the story. They all noticed the splash Elizabeth made when she hit the water though. They all stood looking toward the source of the noise, except Alexia, who was discussing something with herself.

"Where's Chelsea? Oh shit! She must be with Xio, but how? When Will went to Elizabeth? Maybe. Please let her be with Xio." She kept repeating to herself.

"Will you be saving her then?" Jack asked Murtogg pointing at Elizabeth.

"He can't swim and neither can the other one Jack, so stop wasting time!" Alexia shouted standing up suddenly.

"Well do you know how to swim?" Murtogg asked her and she cocked her head at him.

"Of course I do! I took six years of lessons but this is Jack's job not mine!" She narrowed her eyes at the dim witted solider.

"Pride of the Kings Navy, you are!" Jack said handing Alexia his hat.

"Do not loose these!" He said handing Alexia his cutlass, his jacket, and his pistol. But before he could jump in to save poor Lizzie, Alexia grabbed his shirt.

"Jack, I am going to give you some advice. If you get stuck in a sticky situation, try choking her, okay? And don't shake hands with anyone unless you really have to." She whispered to him before she pushed him roughly into the water ruining his perfect dive.

"OFF YOU GO!! MAKE ME PROUD JACK!" She yelled and turned to the two guards again.

"Oh shit. I can't stay here! He's gonna get arrested, then me, and I can't end up in jail all by my onesies!" Alexia said loudly then shoved all of Jack's belongings into their arms.

"Don't under any circumstance LOOSE THESE!" She said as she grabbed Jack's hat and put it on her head. She then started walking toward the docks again.

"Hey where are you going?" Mullroy yelled as she quickened her pace.

"I'm goin to NONE OF YOUR BUSNESS!" She yelled over her shoulder, her hand holding Jack's hat in place as the wind kicked up.

"Where's that?" She heard Murtogg ask.

"WHERE YOUR GOVERNOR OF DUMBASS LAND! DUH!"

Just then the Commodore and more guards ran by. Gillette gave her an odd look and tried to get the Commodores attention but Alexia high tailed it out of there.

"Oh no! I will not be caught by a guy whose name is a razor in the future." She said to herself as she walked nonchalantly to the Black Smith's. When she got there she walked up to the door and tried the knob, finding it open.

"My God Will! You are such a douche." She said and walked inside. Alexia decided to look at some swords because she was tired of the piece of crap one she had stolen from the skinny-dipping eunuchs. She found a really nice folded steel, double-edged cutlass with purple thread landed into the handle, when she heard gunshots.

"I can hear he's made his escape." She said testing out her sword. It was definitely perfect. Just then she remembered Jack was coming and when he saw her with his hat he wouldn't be too happy. So she sheathed her new cutlass and walked over to Mr. Brown who was sound asleep.

"Nice popping up place." She said stooping behind him and his chair just as Jack came busting in.

Alexia could hear him walking around to grab a hammer.

"Blast that girl. Leavin' me to the guards and taking my hat! I shouldn't have shooken that man's hand, she had warned me. That chokin' bit did the trick sure enough though." He said and Alexia had to resist the urge to stand and smack him across the face.

She accidentally hit Mr. Brown's hand in the process and knocked his bottle to the ground. Jack's head swiveled around, looking alarmed until he saw the sleeping Mr. Brown. He came over to investigate and Alexia got ready to jump out. She waited until after Jack poked the man in the chest and when he was about to say, "WHOA!" to pop out.

"ARGH!!" Alexia roared jumping up with her hand held high, fingers wiggling. Jack jumped back ten feet as Alexia folded her arms.

"Yeah, I think he's asleep Jack." She said walking past Mr. Brown who didn't even stir when she had scared Jack.

"What the devil do ya think yer doin? Ya scared me half ter death!" He said snatching his hat off her head and placing it on an anvil.

"Aww, did I scare poor little Captain Jack Sparrow." Alexia mocked as Jack tried and failed to break the chains around his wrists. He puffed out his chest indignantly but ignored her.

"Jack why didn't you use my advice? It was good advice created by the superior girl mind and you just used one of your stupid made up man plans!" Jack ignored this too.

"Why did you come here Jack?" Alexia asked as her shook his shackles to see if they had loosened. No luck.

"I used me compass to find me hat. Yer the only one brave enough ta take it." He said putting the hammer down and looking at Alexia. She smiled

"Yes! My second plan still worked! High five!" She held her hand up but Jack just looked at it slightly confused and put off.

"You slap it with your hand." She sighed, rolling her eyes as her arm tired.

"Oh." He slapped his hand on hers awkwardly. She smiled wide.

"I have an idea Jack about your shackles," Alexia said walking towards the donkey and scratching it behind the ear, "Cute little thing, aren't you?"

"I get it. Use the gears! Thanks for the idea luv." Jack said grabbing a red-hot fire poker and edging toward the donkey. Alexia noticed his evil smile and held her sword to his neck.

"No! Put it back now Jack!" While Jack put the fire poker back Alexia smacked the donkey, making it yelp and move forward. Jack went up to the gears and broke his shackles. Noises from outside the door made both of them look up at the same time.

"Hide! Someone's coming!" He said pulling her behind a barrel. He grabbed her around the middle and held her fast when she tried to get up again. Alexia considered the thought of kicking him in the balls but remember all the fan girls that would kick her ass if she did. So instead she clawed at his arm and hissed like a cat.

"But your hat you drunk! And it's probably just my friends and..." She said pointing at Jack's hat but he just covered her mouth as Will walked in followed by Chelsea and Xio.

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There ya go mates! I actually had to find what his faces name. You know Mr. Brown. Review please and think of Christmas when you do.


	7. WWF Presents: Swashbuckling Fights

Here we go! Swash buckling pirate fights! Black smith vs. Pirate. Place your bets now! Oh my god! Guess what? Chicken butt. Guess why! Chicken thigh. Guees who! Chicken poo. Yeah I know, the last one was kinda inappropriate.

**Remember I don't own pirates. Just me, my sister, Chelsea, and any other people you don't recognize.**

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Xio and Chelsea were just discussing the fact that they were going to meet Captain Jack Sparrow when Will opened the door to the black smith's. The first thing they noticed was Will's donkey running in circles, making all the gears shift and turn. Will ran to the donkey rubbing its nose to calm it down.

"I will have Jack on animal abuse for this!" Xio said quietly to Chelsea. Will looked around and spotted Mr. Brown in his drunken stupor.

"Right where I left you," Will said pulling his jacket off and throwing it on his worktable. Something caught his eye though. There was an empty peg on the wall and its sledge hammer lying beside his work anvil.

"Not where I left you," He noticed Jack's hat sitting on another of his work anvils and reached for it.

"I wouldn't grab that mate," Xio pointed out but Jack's sword blade had already slapped Will's hand before he could make contact with it. Jack stood there, sword leveled at Will. He backed Will up, toward the door. Will glared at him.

"Never mind," They both said going off to the pile of barrels Alexia was sitting on.

"Hey girlfriend! How was it with Jack?" Chelsea asked Alexia as they settled in to watch the show.

"Dunno, he's a bit soft in the head sometimes and smells of rum. But over all he's cool." Alexia said swinging her legs.

"You're the one they're hunting. The _Pirate_." Will said the last word with such disgust Alexia actually felt bad for Jack. Jack acknowledged this with a tip of his head then frowned.

"He's a better pirate than you'll ever be!" Alexia shouted at Will who turned and stared.

"Be quiet Xio!" He said pointing finger at Alexia. She looked positively offended.

"Terribly sorry Will but I'm Alexia not Xio," She said gesturing towards Xio who took a bow, with is hard to do from her sitting position on the barrel. Alexia gave Jack a look and he raised his sword higher.

"You seem some what familiar. Have I threatened you before?" Jack asked.

"Nice one Jack but think, it'll come to ya!" Chelsea yelled. Jack gave her an odd look and ignored her.

"I make point to avoid familiarity with pirates." Will said with the ugliest look on his face. Jack lowered his sword.

"Ah, well then it would be a shame to put a black mark on your record so if you'll excuse me, come on luv," Jack said stepping back to grab his hat. Will quickly grabbed a sword of his own and pointed it at Jack. Jack seemed unimpressed.

"You think this wise, boy? Crossing blades with a pirate?"

"You threatened Miss Swann," Will said holding his sword steady as Jack ran his sword against it.

"Only a little," In response, Will assumed an en garde position. Jack evaluated him, unhappy to see Will knew what he was doing. Jack lunged forward and attacked. The two men stood in one place, trading feints, thrusts and parries with lightning speed, almost impossible to follow. Will had no trouble matching Jack.

"So what are we going to do next?" Alexia asked Chelsea and Xio.

"I don't know but I'm going with Elizabeth when she's kidnapped. Ooo I get to meet Pintel and Ragetti," Chelsea scratched her head," I guess after this I'll have to go back to the manor."

"Yeah and Alexia we have to switch or I'm goin kill Will soon," Xio said sticking a thumb over her shoulder at Will. He and Jack were now talking about footwork but since the girls knew all of the words of the movie by heart they barely paid attention.

"You know what you're doing, I'll give you that. Excellent form! But how's your footwork?" Jack said as he took a step around an imaginary circle. Will stepped the other way, maintaining his relationship to Jack.

"If I step here..." Jack side stepped and attacked Will who easily parried it," Very good! Now I step again."

Jack moved in a circle swinging at Will until they were exactly opposite of their initial positions. Jack stopped and gave Will a small bow.

"Ta!" he climbed up to the door and had his hand on the handle when Will threw his sword.

It struck its mark right above the latch so the door could not be opened. Jack first tried to lift the latch, to no avail, then began to jiggle the sword roughly. Jack mouthed a curse before spinning around to give Will an evil smile.

"That is a wonderful trick-" He pulled out his sword against the unarmed Will, "- except, once again you are between me and my way out and-" Jack gestured to the back door with his sword, "- you have no weapon."

Never looking away from Jack, Will whipped out a red-hot sword that had been resting in the furnace. Jack slumped alittle before leaping forward. When the donkey saw the glowing sword it squealed and started the gear shifting again. They began fighting once more around the main support for Will's machine. Jack looked around at all the bladed weapons laying about.

"Who makes all these?" Jack asked swinging again. Alexia raised her hand smiling like a crazy person while Will popped around the other side of the support beam.

"I do," he swung at Jack while he threw hammers at him," And I practice with them three hours a day!" Will said proudly. The girls rolled their eyes simultaneously.

"You need to find your self a girl, mate." Jack ran around grabbing everything and anything to throw at Will but he dodged the hammers and lunged at him.

"Or perhaps the reason you practice three hours is that you already found one and are incapable of wooing said strumpet." Jack gave Will the oddest of looks.

"You're not a Eunuch are you?" Jack looked down and all the girls started giggling.

"EUNUCH, EUNUCH!!" They sang as Will gave them all dirty looks but they just kept giggling.

"I practice three hours a day so that when I meet a pirate I can KILL it!" Will shouted and pushed Jack away with his sword and kicking up another to fight with.

They then started fighting, blades flashing, on an unstable titter totter wagon. Jack swung the chain still attached around his wrist, smashing them against Will's sword. The chain wrapped around Will's cutlass and he takes the moment to twist the blade through a link and stab it into the beam above them. Jack only had one hand now.

"COME ON JACK!"

"YEAH DON"T BE A WIMP!"

"KICK HIM TO THE CURB JACK!

Jack started swinging like mad, then found a loose board and hit Will in the face with it. As Will fell backwards Jack hoisted himself upside and using his full weight he finally managed to yank his cutlass free. Unfortunately Will got back up on the wagon just as Jack fell from the beam, shooting him high into the rafters.

"That can't be good for a man his age," Xio commented lightly in a British accent. Chelsea giggled. Jack rolled back into the small unrising that lead to the front door. He got up, shaking his head, and looked around for Will.

"Look up you mangy DOG!" Xio screamed as Chelsea and Alexia hugged each other laughing.

Jack looked up and smiled at Will in the rafters. Will smiled back and cut loose a case of barrels spending Jack up into the rafters too. Jack pulled himself up and moved to the right so Will couldn't reach.

"Don't let him get in your head!" Alexia shouted from her barrel. They were all in tears from laughing so hard.

Will went to the right then back to the left quickly confusing Jack who moved but moved back so he was in front of Will.

"Float like a butterfly, Sting like a BEE!" Chelsea screamed laughing hard and falling off of her barrel. Alexia and Xio came down too holding their sides and laughing like retarded hyenas.

As they fought in the rafters Jack sidestepped Will and tried to get down. But Will beat him to it so Jack grabbed the bellow beside him and sprayed Will in the face with red sand. Before Will could open his eyes, Jack kicked the sword out of his hand and brought out his pistol. Alexia, Chelsea, and Xio popped their head over the tops of the barrels just in time to see Will hold up a hammer and open his eyes.

"NO!" All three girls gasped as Jack pointed the pistol right in Will's face. Will however looked confused.

"You cheated." Will stated, shocked.

"Pirate." Jack said like that made everything right. The Commodore and his men started beating on the front door. Will hurried to cover the back door again.

"Move away." Jack voice was hard but he didn't want to fight again.

"No." Will said as Alexia came up beside him and held her cutlass towards Jack. Jack looked confused and sad that his friend had turned on him. That is until Xio walked up beside Jack and held her sword to Alexia.

"So you've chosen your side then?" Xio asked as Chelsea ran up.

"Reckon I have." Alexia said raising her sword.

"Stop it you guys! Your sister's for crepes sake!" She said but didn't bother to stop them. She knew they had made up their minds.

"Please move." Jack said very nicely, both Will and Alexia shook their heads.

"No, I can not just step aside and let you escape!" Will said eying the front door again.

Jack cocked his pistol and pointed at Will again.

"This shot is not meant for you!" He said but Will just stared at him.

"What the freck?" Alexia said quickly as Mr. Brown brought his bottle down on Jack's head.

Xio knelt down to help Jack as the Navy came bursting through. Alexia gave Chelsea a look telling her to go and she quietly exited through the back door. The guards surrounded Xio and Jack as the Commodore came up.

"Excellent work Mr. Brown you've assisted in the capture of a dangerous criminal." Norrington said putting his gun away.

"Just doing my civic duties," Will and Alexia shared a look, he still sounded way too drunk to be awake.

"Well I trust that you will always remember this is the day Captain Jack Sparrow almost escaped. Take him away." Xio moved away from Jack as the guards picked him up.

"What about these two Sir?" Gillette asked grabbing Xio and Alexia by the wrists.

"Commodore , they're under my charge." Will spoke up. Alexia gave him a grateful look but Xio glared.

"No I'm not! I'm under the charge of Captain Jack Sparrow!" Xio yelled and spat at Will's feet. Gillette let go of Alexia and grabbed Xio's other wrist.

"Come on we will let her stay in the brig with her Captain." They all laughed and dragged both Jack and Xio away. Alexia felt sad watching them go but she knew she'd see Xio again tomorrow. She looked at Will.

"Thanks for the save Will." She gave him a hug. He grabbed her shoulders and held her at arms length. He looked her over.

"Well, you did stand up for me so I could not let you go to the brig with that Pirate." Will smiled and so did Alexia. She looked him over and laughed.

"You got a little something on your face." Alexia said pointing to her own face while Will blindly swiped at his.

"Got it?" He asked. Half of the dirt on his face was gone so Alexia grabbed a rag and had to rub the rest off with spit and elbow grease.

"Got it." Alexia smiled looking over her work. Will smiled unknowingly, he had not noticed when she had spit in the rag to remove the dirt.

"Come on, I have some work to get done. Would you like to watch?" He asked showing her some of his tools at his workstation. What was Xio talking about hanging with Will is kinda of fun, Alexia thought and she sat on a barrel, munching messily on a mango he had offered her, and watched him work.

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And there you go. Review! I made chocolate éclair pie. Yummy!


	8. All Wait For The Cannon Fire

Welcome to the jacked in prison chapter. Find out the interesting life of prison scum and how meaningless words can't change your lives. That and I heard a rumor that the dog in the movie is the director's dog for reallsies. I'm not sure it's real but review me if you know for sure it is.

**DON"T OWN PIRATES! Imagine if I did.**

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The brig was just as bad as Xio had imagined it would but she had to follow Jack so here she was. Leaning against the wall examining her fingernails and fingering the emerald's on her pants. Jack had woken up and sat watching Xio and her emeralds. She could tell he was trying to think of a way out of here.

"Come here boy."

"Come smell the bone."

"Have a nice juicy bone."

The other jailed pirates whistled and pleaded with the dog, trying to make it move forward but it just sat there, ring of keys in its mouth, staring blankly at them.

"Keep doing that forever the dog is never going to move." Jack said he sounded vaguely amused by their antics.

"Oh excuse us if we haven't reserved ourselves to the gallows just yet." One of the men said before going back to tempting the dog. Jack leaned back smiling.

"Missy you haven't told me why yer sister betrayed me." Jack said as he looked at Xio from under his hat.

"The names Xio and Alexia made her choice. I couldn't take Will anymore so she traded with me." She shot him a look that wiped the smirk off his face.

"So now you have Dear old Jack aye?" he said tipping his hat and falling silent. Xio stretched and thought of how Chelsea was going on a boat ride.

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Chelsea hustled to the manor just as the sun began to set.

"I made it in good time!" She said quietly to herself as she snuck in through the back door. She immediately went to the maid's station. Estrella was there mending some clothing and barely looked up as she entered.

"Ah Chelsea your back. Please finish this and I'll go tuck Miss Swann in for bed. She's had such a trying day with being taken hostage by that pirate." Estrella said placing the cloth on the table as Chelsea reached for a pitcher.

"Oh Estrella why don't you stay here and take a rest." Chelsea said sweetly as she brought the pitcher down on her head. Estrella's eyes fluttered shut and Chelsea put the pitcher down on the table.

"Now where to hide her?" She looked around and spotted the broom closet.

"Perfect!" She purred and dragged Estrella's unconscious body to the closet. After pushing with all her might she closed the door and locked it.

"Can't have you come out again. Not yet." Chelsea grabbed the pitcher again, filled it with water, and then trumped upstairs where Elizabeth was waiting in her bed reading.

"Ah Miss Swann I brought you some water." Chelsea said plastering a fake smile to her face as she put the pitcher down by the water basin. Elizabeth just flipped a page in her book as Chelsea when over and filled a bed warmer with hot coals.

"Stupid Ice Princess." Chelsea mumbled as she lifted the sheets at the foot of Elizabeth's bed and slid the holder under them.

"There you go Miss. It was a difficult day for you I'm sure." Chelsea had no trouble reciting these worthless words as she smoothed over Elizabeth bedspread.

"Hmm I suspected that Commodore Norrington would purpose but I must admit I wasn't entirely prepared for it." She said never looking away from her book, as she toyed with her medallion absentmindedly.

"I meant you being threatened by that pirate. Sounds terrifying." Chelsea said making Elizabeth look up and give her a confused look.

"Oh, yes is was terrifying." Elizabeth had a far away expression on her face as Chelsea pulled at the sheets again, unsure of what to do now.

"But the Commodore purposed! Fancy that. Now that's a smart match Miss if it's not to bold to say."

"It's is a smart match. He's a fine man. He's what any woman should dream of marrying." Elizabeth looked back at her book. Chelsea stood hands on her hips, smiling.

"But that Will Turner, he's a fine man to." Chelsea smoothed her sheets one more time.

"That is to bold." She said giving Chelsea a dirty look. Chelsea looked up at her and smiled wider.

"Whatever!" she scoffed and exited the room. She closed the door quietly and settled down to wait for the canons to start up.

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Will and Alexia where practicing sword fighting when Will suddenly stopped. He looked around and moved toward the window. He opened it and looked out.

"What is it Will?" Alexia asked standing behind him sheathing her cutlass.

"I'm not sure. Something doesn't seem to feel right." Will turned to look at her and she shivered.

"The Black Pearl." She whispered as the entire room shook.

"Canon fire?" Will looked out the window again.

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The canon fire made both Jack and Xio flinched and look up.

"I know those canons." Xio mouthed the words as Jack jumped up and looked of the barred window. Xio jumped up too and pushed Jack to the side so she could watch Port Royal get blown up. Her eyes widen as she watched the docks explode on impact.

"It's the Pearl." Jack said to himself as Xio turned towards him.

"The Black Pearl?" One of the other prisoners walked up to the bars and hugged them

"I've heard stories. She's been preying on ships and settlements for near ten years. Never leaves any survivors."

Jack laughed. "No survivors? Then where do the stories come from I wonder?" He said smugly looking at the confused inmate.

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Will started over to his tools and grabbed some axes, stuffing them onto his belt.

"Will, are you seriously going out there?" Alexia asked grabbing another cutlass and Mr. Brown's pistol.

"Yes I have to help protect the people!" Will looked at Alexia and pointed to his room at the back of the workshop.

"You will hide." He pushed her toward the back but she gave him a look.

"I'm going with you Will." Alexia started towards the door but Will stepped in front of her.

"Fine but stay close to me. Please, I don't want you to get hurt." He walked out and right then a woman ran by being chased by a pirate.

Will chucked an axe at the pirate hitting him in the back and killing him instantly. He ran by the pirate, grabbing the axe and fighting off another pirate. Alexia stayed hot on his heels shooting any pirate she saw. She had relatively good aim because her stepfather had been apart of the border patrol and taught her how to shoot correctly. He said she would probably never need to shoot a gun.

"Yeah well, I guess he never thought this would happen. Who would?" Alexia said to herself as she fought off another pirate.

* * *

Yes my step father is in the Border Patrol and so is my Hispanic mother. So laugh all you want. Ha ditty ha ha. Read and Review.


	9. Exploding Impact Of Marshmellow

Umm first of all Pintel and Ragetti are my all time favorites (along with Cotton, Gibbs, and that midget) so their semi main characters in this. That and the fact that the taller black pirate with the crazy tattoos and stuff is mean. So I made Chelsea do something that made him cry. Anyway's I did this part in time with the movie and I'm not quite sure how you'll like it so read review and tell me how I can do a better job. Thanks dollface or kenface. Kenface?

AND I don't what the title of this chapter means either. I popped into my head.

**DoN't OwN PiRaTeS! I can't stand typing like that. Looks cool though.**

* * *

Elizabeth ran to her balcony to see Port Royal in shambles. Chaos ruled. Even through the fog she could see buildings and ships burning and the harbor exploding right before her eyes. Chelsea crossed into her room and tapped her shoulder. She looked around, the fear very clear in her eye.

"Elizabeth look!" Chelsea pointed to the gate just as a group of pirates burst through them.

Elizabeth looked faint but only gasped and ran towards the hall. Chelsea was right behind her. She watched as the butler walked to the door. He was going to answer the knocking as Elizabeth ran down the stairs and tried to get his attention.

"Don't!" She shouted from the landing overlooking the foyer but it was too late.

"Ello chum." Pintel said and with a sickening BOOM the butler went stiff as a board.

Elizabeth covered her mouth as she screamed, trying to be quiet but Pintel and Ragetti spotted her. Chelsea waved her back in her room closing and locking the door behind her.

"Elizabeth uhh they've they've... Oh shoot." Chelsea mumbled as she tried to remember the line. Elizabeth turned to her when she heard her name.

"Elizabeth they've come to kidnap you!" Chelsea said grabbing her by the shoulders.

"What?" Elizabeth looked at Chelsea bewildered. Chelsea shook her a bit.

"You're the Governor's daughter Elizabeth!" She reminded her. Elizabeth finally got it when Pintel started banging on the door.

"Come on Elizabeth!" Chelsea dragged her into the other room as Ragetti busted open the door. Pintel ran into Elizabeth's room only to be hit in the with the metal holder fill with still hot coals. Chelsea grabbed a fire poker from the mantle and whack Pintel in the shin. He fell back ward, holding his nose, as Ragetti grabbed the metal holder.

"Boo! Boo!" He said taunting Elizabeth. She seemed scared at first but then sneered at Ragetti and pulled a lever.

Suddenly hot coals showered over him and Chelsea smashed his shoulder with the fire poker. She then grabbed Elizabeth and ran out of the room, and down the stairs toward the door. Pintel was right behind them as Ragetti jumped from the landing and landing right in front of them. They stood there staring at each other until another pirate came out of the foyer with an armful of jewelry. A canon then shot through the wall sent him back in. Elizabeth and Chelsea took the distraction to run to the dining room, the crystal chandelier crashing on the floor behind them. Chelsea grabbed some of the fallen crystals and closed the door behind her, blocking it with a candlestick holder while Elizabeth ran over and grabbed the decorative swords. She tried very hard to jiggle one of the swords free but Chelsea grabbed her again.

"You come on. We don't have time for this, hide now!" She forcefully pushed Elizabeth into a hidden closet as Pintel and Ragetti broke the candleholder and made their way around the room looking for them.

"We know you're here poppets!" Pintel said.

"Poppets." Ragetti repeated as if it needed repeating.

"Ooo, that's his trade mark!" Chelsea whispered to Elizabeth but she didn't say a word.

"Come out and we promise not at 'urt you!" Ragetti started to protest but then caught on to Pintel's little game.

"We will find you..." Pintel came closer to the closet; he's seen the fold in the carpet. Damn.

"Eww he sounds like a serial killer." Chelsea said to herself as Elizabeth fingered her the gold coin on her necklace.

"The gold calls to us." Pintel closed the gap between him and the door. Elizabeth looked up from her necklace to see Pintel's leering face covered the gap in the two doors.

"Ello poppet!" He said opening the door. Chelsea screamed and hid behind Elizabeth.

"PARLEY!" Chelsea screamed from behind Elizabeth.

"What?" Pintel looked confused but Elizabeth was more confident.

"We invoke the right of parley." Elizabeth said standing straighter.

"According to the code of the brethren set down by the pirates Morgan and Bartholomew you have to take us to the captain."

"I know the code!" Pintel snapped.

"If an adversary demands parley, then you can do them no harm until the parley is complete." Elizabeth recited breathlessly.

"It would appear, so do you." Pintel though for a moment.

"To blazes with the code!" Ragetti said angrily his hair still smoldering slightly. He moved forward menacingly put Pintel stopped him with a heavy hand on his chest.

"She's wants to be taken to the Captain." Pintel gave Ragetti a look.

"Hi Ragetti!" Chelsea said coming to stand next to Elizabeth. She poked him.

"Hmm you seem real to me. How does it feel to be considered dead when your still here?" She asked but Ragetti just grabbed her.

"It's weird." Ragetti said pushing her forward.

"Hmm interesting." Chelsea pondered a thought as she was pushed into the hall.

"And she'll go without a fuss!" Pintel half asked Elizabeth who nodded.

"We must honor the code!" He announced and grabbed Elizabeth roughly by the arm.

* * *

Will fought a tough looking pirate, as Alexia lay unconscious. The pirate had smacked her hard in the face sending her to the ground. Will had gotten to her in time to stop the pirate from raping her right then and there. But now he was being held against his will as the pirate raised his axe.

"Say Goodbye!" The pirate said raising his axe higher, preparing to swing but he never got a chance because canon ball shook loose a store sign that hit him back into a window.

"Goodbye." Will said looking around for Alexia. Instead he saw Elizabeth and Chelsea being herded away towards the Pearl.

"Will!" Elizabeth tried to go towards him but she was pushed forward, Chelsea right behind her.

"Elizabeth!" Will shouted but noticed the pirate he had killed earlier standing right in front of him.

He looked at the pirate who laughed and pointed to the bomb at his feet. Will looked down at the bomb with wide eyes but the fuse burned out and nothing happened. Will cocked his head and raised his axe again smirking. Alexia awoke and watched a pirate running by with a silver candlestick.

"Will watch out!" She shouted holding out her hand but the pirate hit him in the head and he fell right in front of her. She sighed then kneeled beside him putting his head in her lap.

"Oh dear." She sat watching the pirates and the chaos around her.

* * *

Xio watched all the mayhem in Port Royal as Jack watched the Pearl. Another canon fired as Xio noticed the canon ball coming straight towards them.

"Oh shit! HIT THE DECK!" She yelled tackling Jack to the ground.

The canon blasted a hole through the wall of the two cells. Jack helped Xio crawl out from under the rubble of the blown out wall. Only the hole in Xio and Jack cell was the size of a watermelon so they couldn't escape and settled for watching the others go. Moonlight spilled through the gaping hole teasing Jack with freedom. Xio folded her arms and walk to the front of the cell, Jack followed her sadly. She indicated to the bone on the ground and Jack picked it up.

"Go ahead give it a go. Will doesn't come until morning." She sat down again playing with Jack's hat she had stolen earlier.

He whistled like all the others trying to coax the scared dog to come closer. "Come on doggy. It's just you and me now. Just you and old Jack."

Xio snorted and accidentally kicked Jack's back when she moved into a sitting position. He turned and gave her look but all she did was put up her hands and roll her eyes.

"Jack, your friends are coming. Be Careful."

"Come on. Bit closer, bit closer. That's it. Come on you filthy slimy mangy cat." Jack said irritated at his slow progress. Xio laughed as the door to the jail crashed open and scared the dog away.

"No no no no no! I didn't mean it. I didn't!" Jack pleaded the dog just kept going. Only when Xio got up did Jack notice the guards as they fell down the stairs. Two pirates appeared arguing.

"This ain't the Armory!" The one with the bandana said angrily, looking around. The other one had dread locks and spotted Jack on the floor.

"Well well well, look what we have here Twigg! Captain Jack Sparrow." Koehler said disgusted and spat at Jack's feet.

"The last time I saw you were all alone, on a god forsaken island, shrinking into the distance. His fortunes haven't improved much." Twigg said laughing but Jack held his ground.

"I'd worry about your own fortunes gentlemen the deepest circle of hell is reserved for…" but Xio interrupted.

"Let me guess Captain, betrayers and mutineers?" Xio said laughing a tinkling and annoying laugh that Jack joined in on, until Koehler reached through the cell and choked Jack. Xio gasped at the skeleton hand that was wrapped around Jack's neck.

Jack looked surprised," So there is a curse? That's interesting."

"You know nothing of hell." He leered shoving Jack backwards, hard.

"I have a hunch that it might be your breath." Xio said pinching her nose close and fanning the air around it. Twigg gave her a look that told her to shove it so she spit right in his face.

"Now run home and tell your Mommy Barbossa what that nasty little girl did ta ya." Xio sounded like big bully on the block.

The pirates then turned on a heel and walked out. Xio snorted again and planted herself on the floor at Jack's feet. Jack however stood examining the dog bone.

"Very interesting." He said as he sat down next to Xio sharpening the bone on the floor. Xio sighed.

"What's in your head Jack?" She asked trying to make conversation.

"Use this bone ter unlock the cell door 'cause the keys have run off. "He said concentrating on sharpening the bone the best he could.

Xio yawned, "Okay but it's not going to work."

"How do you know?" He looked up from his work.

"Number one, because it's a stupid idea," She held up one finger, "Two because you thought it up," She help another one up, "And three, you're easily distracted."

She used those two fingers to poke Jack in both of his eyes. He yelped.

"So wake me when Alexia and Will get here okay?" She put on Jack's hat and tilted it forward to cover her eyes.

"How do you know Will and Alexia will come let us out?" Jack asked sharpening his bone again.

"Because someone has stolen his bonnie lass." She leaned her head back. "Oh and Jack, don't try anything while I'm asleep. I saw you eyeing my emeralds. You take them, I scalp you alive." She fingered her sword and knew Jack was watching her.

* * *

Ragetti and Pintel pulled Chelsea and Elizabeth onto the Black Pearl. Chelsea looked around excitingly, as Pintel pulled Elizabeth away.

"I didn't know we was taking on captives." A huge black pirate with burned in tattoos said to Pintel.

"She invoked the right to parley with Captain Barbossa." He replied quickly but Elizabeth pushed him out of the way.

"I'm here to negotiate…" But she didn't finish because Bosun smacked her across the face.

"You speak when spoken to." Bosun leered but Chelsea came up to him and punched him where the sun don't shine. He fell to his knees crying a little.

"And ye'll not lay a hand on those under the protection of parley!" She shouted kicking him over so he was a heap at Barbossa feet. Elizabeth looked over at her and mouthed a thank you. Chelsea shrugged. Barbossa stepped over the big pirate and stood before the two women.

"Captain Barbossa. I am here to negotiate the suasion of hostiles against Port Royal." She said quickly. Chelsea was surprise she didn't choke on any of those smart words.

"There be a lot of long words there Miss. We're not but humble pirates. What tis it that you want?" He smiled showing silver and gold teeth.

"She wants you to leave and never come back and I'm betting your not willing to acquiesce her request? What do you say monkey boy?" Chelsea asked Barbossa twisting a piece of hair around her finger. He grabbed her roughly by the chin and looked her straight in the eye.

"Quite a little spit fire don't ya think lads?" All the pirates laughed but Chelsea narrowed her eyes at Barbossa a snapped her teeth at his hand.

"Only because she's knows I have something you want." Elizabeth said pulling the necklace off and dangling it over the edge. All the pirates moved towards her.

"She's not bluffing Barbossa so listen to her or you can say bye bye to your one chance to eating that apple again." Chelsea crossed her arms and smirked at Barbossa

"Do you have a name Missy?" he asked walking towards Elizabeth. Chelsea mouth "Turner" to her.

"Oh yes I'm Elizabeth… Turner," Elizabeth said uncertainly then curtsied, "I'm a maid in the governor's household."

"Ooo, Boot Strap!" Chelsea whispered to Ragetti.

"And I'm Chelsea Scott also a maid!" Chelsea stepped forward with her hands on her hips and her chest puffed out like Superman. Barbossa ignored her.

"And how does a maid come to own a trinket such as that. Family heirloom perhaps?"

"Wouldn't you love it to be Barbossa?" Chelsea snorted, as Elizabeth looked confused.

"Very well ya hand it over and we'll put your town behind us and never return." Chelsea tried to say don't do it but Pintel covered her mouth which she promptly bite.

"Don't touch tubby!" Chelsea said as Elizabeth handed over the necklace.

"A bargain." Chelsea shook her head as Elizabeth turned around and followed Barbossa up the stairs. Chelsea followed slowly and only heard Barbossa's last sentence.

"Welcome aboard the Black Pearl Miss Turner and Miss Scott." He said laughing as Pintel and Ragetti grabbed them again. They were shoved into a room next to the Captain's quarters.

"Talk ta ya later Ragetti." She mumbled as he closed and locked the door.

Now I'm stuck with a scared and shaken Elizabeth, Chelsea thought as she sat on the floor next to her.

* * *

Yeah I know I made Barbossa off as belittling, condescending bastard but who doesn't love a good bad guy? Review, you know you want to.


	10. Piggy Back Rides and Hump de Dumpty

Sorry I was off at camping all weekend. Totally sucked but at least I was in a camper this time and not in a tent. Nah it still sucked big time. But I got to taste a grape ape. It's a smoothie that I swear is heaven in a cup. It has grape and bananas, yes it sounds gross but it's was so good I can't explain it. Here's some ballerina dancing and needle stabbing feelings.

**BIG POTC fan but not the owner. You can take that up with dear Disney himself.**

* * *

It was morning in Port Royal when Will awoke to Alexia's worried face. Of course when she saw he was awake she smiled.

"Wake up Will" She gently shook his shoulders. That's when Will noticed his head was resting in her lap. He sat up suddenly and regretted it as his head spun.

"Thank goodness you're awake. My thighs fell asleep ages ago!" She said standing up, rubbing her thighs, and wincing at the needle stabbing feeling in her legs.

"Sorry. I don't know what happened." He said blushing; he then looked up at Alexia as she held out her hand.

"Come on, I'll explain on the way." She grabbed both of his hands and pulled him to his feet. He was obviously still feeling a little dizzy. He stumbled a few times.

"Hmm maybe we should wait. I don't want you going all Elizabeth on me." She held Will steady as he tittered on the spot again.

"No I'm fine. Just light headed is all." Will started to walk, Alexia followed beside him. Keeping an eye on him to make sure he didn't faint from the sun or some other bullshit.

"Yeah you seem to have a spot on the back of your skull that's as soft as a peach." Alexia pointed out, her eyes slid to the back of his head. He looked befuddled.

"What?" Will tilted his head to the side like a puppy. Alexia made the "awww" face.

"Nothing."

"So what happened?" He asked taking in the look of the new battered and bruised Port Royal.

"Well, I got knocked out and when I came about I saw a pirate coming at you, in the middle of the town, with a silver candle stick holder. And he banged you on the head and you went out like a light." She tapped her chin with her finger as she tried to remember anything else.

"Oh and Pirates took Chelsea and Elizabeth." She looked to Will for a reaction.

"Elizabeth." He whispered more to himself than to Alexia. She shrugged.

"Yep let's see if Commodore has any ideas to where she might be. Though I know for sure he won't, the bloody tosser!" She said as they entered the Fort. Will spotted the Governor and Commodore at a table map. He ran up to join them.

"They've taken her! They've taken Elizabeth!" Will shouted, Alexia fell in step behind him.

"Mr. Murtogg please remove this man." The Commodore said not even bothering to look up at Will. Alexia unsheathed her cutlass and held it to Murtogg throat.

"Back up there tubby" She said forcing him back.

"Oh it's you. Jack Sparrows friend, of sorts." Mullroy said pointing at her.

"Yes, yes I am. How's it going Mullroy?" She asked lowering her sword.

"Good. Got promoted. Most soldiers were injured yesterday so we're sort of back up." He said motioning towards both Murtogg and himself modestly.

"Aww. Good for you." Alexia smiled and put her cutlass away.

"We have to hunt them down, we must save her!" Will yelled.

"No need to yell Will. We're all right here." Alexia crossed her arms and sighed.

"And where do you propose we start? If you have any information concerning my daughter please share it with us." The Governor said wearily. He was tired and concerned for his daughter's well being.

"Jack Sparrow might know a thing or two about the Black Pearl." Alexia threw out on the table with a flick of her hand.

"Ask him where it is. Make a deal with him, he could lead us to it!" Will was on the verge of desperation.

"No," the Commodore sighed," The pirates that invaded this Fort left Sparrow locked in his cell. Ergo, he is not their ally and therefore of no value."

"Hey Will take it down a few notches, and put your hand down." Alexia whisper in his ear but Will still slammed his axe on the table in front of him.

"That's not good enough!" He shouted. Alexia patted his shoulder, trying to calm him down. Norrington looked at the axe in his table and removed it.

"Mr. Turner. You are not a military man, you are not a sailor, you are a Black Smith," Norrington walked up to Will and grabbed his arm pushing him towards the edge of their head quarters. Alexia watched his every move.

"This is not the time for rash action, both of you." He looked over at Alexia then turned back to Will.

"Do not make the mistake thinking you are the only man here that cares for Elizabeth." He slapped the axe back into Will's hand. Alexia stepped forward and leaned into Norrington so her lips were close to his ear.

"Then why does Elizabeth return his feelings and not yours?" She whispered then joined Will again. The Commodore stood watching her go, thinking over what she had just said.

* * *

Jack fiddled with the lock on the cell door again. Xio finally got up and smacked the bone out of his hand. He turned on her but said nothing to the look on her face.

"Do you know how annoying that jingling is?" She hissed quietly.

"I'm tryin to get us outta here!" Jack shouted back. Xio cocked her head and raised her eyebrows.

"Don't worry about it Jack, just Relax." She walked over to him and stood close, looking him in the eye. Jack stood still not knowing what to expect. Xio traced a finger around his jaw line and rested her hand there.

"As I said Jack relax." She gripped the side of his face and pushed him hard to the ground.

Just then she heard the sound she had been waiting to hear for hours. The sounds of boots coming down the stairs. Jack lounged on the floor faking a relaxed, at ease pose.

"Thank you baby Jesus! With your white diapers and your little Baby Einstein's play set." Xio pressed herself against the bars as Will and Alexia came into view.

"Oh my god! Xio I've missed you like you wouldn't believe." Alexia ran forward and hugged Xio through the bars. Will nodded towards Xio who glared at him, making him flinch.

"Why do you hate me?" He asked facing Xio looking confused. She snorted.

"Cause you suck." She looked him up and down. Alexia crossed her arms and gave Xio her double death stare.

"Fine. I guess your okay." Xio helped Jack up from the floor as she said this, never looking Will in the eye.

"It's okay Will, she'll warm up to ya." Alexia patted his shoulder.

"Really?" He looked surprised.

"Well, no probably not." She tapped her finger on her chin as Jack stared at her.

"I see yer brave enough ta show yer pretty face again luv." Jack said sarcastically as he leaned against the bar, Alexia gave him a deadly smile.

"I'm here helping Will spring you." Her tone dripped with sweetness. Will suddenly remembered why they were there.

"You Sparrow! Where does the Black Pearl make berth?" Will pointed a finger at Jack while Xio and Alexia exchanged looks.

"Have you not heard the stories?" Xio questioned in an up beat voice as she mocked a surprised look.

"The Black Pearl, crew and all, only sail to Isle de Muerta. An island that can only be found by those who already know where it is." Alexia recited clasping her hands together and holding them to her face. Jack's mouth fell open.

"How did you know that?" He tried to grab her arms but she spun away from him like a ballerina.

"I'm magic Jack. Pure Magic with a hint of craziness." She continued to dance around as Will and Jack stared. Xio however laughed at Alexia's antics and slapped Jack on the back.

"The ships real enough so the anchorage must be a real place. Where is it?" Will asked still watching Alexia prance around.

"Why do you ask?" Jack smirked but Xio was coming to the end of her last line.

"Because your a pirate." Will said through clench teeth. Jack smiled.

"And you want to become pirate yourself?" He raised an eyebrow at Will

"Jack he wants to save Elizabeth. Now agree to help him so he can get us out of here!" Xio shouted smacking him up side his head.

Jack rubbed his head and pouted. Will sighed again as Alexia ran forward and tackled him. He didn't fall, however, and held her up in a piggyback ride style. Jack stared open mouthed at Alexia and turned to Xio.

"How can he get us out of here? Remember, the keys ran of when you were laughing at me!" He whined. Xio sighed and looked to Will for an answer. He was trying to get Alexia to get off his back.

"I helped build these cells. Their made with half pin barrel hinges. With the proper amount of leverage and the right amount of strength the door will lift free." Will now struggled to get Alexia off his back but she just slipped off.

"Yeah lets use this bench!" Alexia moved towards the bench and helped Will place it against the bars. Jack looked at Will with curiosity.

"What's your name, son?" Jack asked leaning against the bars again.

"Will Turner." Will looked confused as something flashed across Jack's face.

"That'd be short for William, Jack. Good strong name huh? Maybe a good name for your father right?" Xio said looking off into space.

"Yes." Will said suspiciously, she turned to Alexia who just smiled.

"Well I've changed me mind…" but Jack didn't get to finish before Alexia lifted the bench and pulled the door free.

"Come on someone would have heard that." She dusted her hands off as everyone stared at her.

"What? I'm strong for my size." Alexia put her hands on her hips as Jack pushed past her.

"Not without my effects!" Xio and Alexia hive fived each and exchanged a few words.

"_OH NO!" _They both screamed as they ran past Will and Jack up the stairs, laughing like a gaggle of geese. Jack and Will stared after them shaking their heads. They shared a look and made their way to the docks.

* * *

They were all now hiding out under a bridge. Jack looked around wildly trying to think up a plan.

"We're going to steal a ship?" Will looked at the ship Jack was gazing at.

"That ship?" Will pointed to the ship. Alexia sighed and went back to whispering to Xio.

"So what's the name of an ape that has the same sounding name as his title?" Alexia asked Xio. She knew she wouldn't get it. Xio shrugged and gave up.

"It's Magilla Gorilla! Duh Xio." She slapped Xio's arm for her stupidity and turned back to Jack.

"No, we're going to commandeer that ship." he motioned towards the _Dauntless_.

"Nautical term."

"One question about your business, boy, or there's no use in going." Jack took a breath.

"This girl. How far are you willing to go to save her?"

"I'd die for her." Will said lovingly. Xio and Alexia sighed deeply.

"Beautiful." Alexia leaned on Xio.

"Just Beautiful!" Xio said with a dreamy look in her eye.

"Good and you two?" Jack turned to Alexia and Xio and looked at each other.

"Well duh! Do ya think we'd stay here and not go on the biggest adventure of our lives?" Alexia shouted. She tried to be quiet but she was loud by natural. Her inside voice was way louder than anyone's by far.

"What about your family?" Will asked Xio while they made their way across the beach and toward an over turned long boat.

"Just think of that nursery rhyme. Hump de dumpty sat on a wall. Hump de dumpty had a great fall." Xio sang softly to herself.

Will gave her an odd look before following Alexia and Jack up the long boat. Soon they were underwater holding onto the boat. Jack was leading, with Xio behind him, then Alexia and Will bringing up the rear. Alexia noticed her feet and Xio's feet didn't really touch the bottom of the sand. They were just floating as Jack and Will did all the work.

"This is either madness or brilliantness!" Will exclaimed making Alexia start giggling. Xio looked back at her and shushed her.

"It's remarkable how often those two traits coincide." Jack said as he looked down at his feet for some reason. Just then Will stepped into a lobster cage. Alexia's giggling started up again.

"I always wondered why he stepped in that thing."

"Maybe it was a blooper and they just kept it in." Xio said trying to stifle her laughing.

Will looked confused but didn't have time to ask about it. They had reached the _Dauntless_ and started climbing over the side. Alexia and Xio hung back as Jack and Will jumped on deck. A group of soldiers sat in the middle of the deck playing dice. Mullroy and Murtogg were among them.

"Everyone stay calm." Jack's voice carried over the railing, "We are taking over this ship!"

Alexia and Xio popped their heads over the side just as Will made himself look so stupid it wasn't even funny.

"Aye! Avast!" Will held up his sword as Jack lowered his and glared at him. The rest of the crew laughed at him.

"This ship can not be crewed by two men! You'll never make it out of the bay." Gillette said, still laughing a little.

Xio and Alexia laughed too as the walked up and pulled their swords out. Jack got out his gun and cocked it. He aimed right at Gillette's face and smiled.

"I'm Captain Jack Sparrow, savvy?" He smiled wider, showing a few gold teeth.

* * *

"Hey look it's the Commodore!" Xio yelled waving over the side at the _Interceptor_ that was sailing towards them.

"HI COMMODORE!" Alexia yelled at the top of her lungs. Will grabbed both of them from the side.

"Here they come." He said holding Alexia and Xio back, which was proving difficult to do.

Jack turned and looked back at the _Interceptor, _which had picked up speed, and smiled. Soon the _Interceptor_ came up along side the _Dauntless_ and the soldiers started to board. Jack and Will grabbed the ropes to swing across to the other ship.

"Which one of ya is comin' with good old Jack?" Jack held out his arm and Xio stepped forward.

He grabbed her and swung across as Alexia walked up to Will. He wrapped an arm tightly around her waist. As they swung across Alexia resisted yelling for joy but they couldn't let the Commodore know they had made the switch.

Jack was already at the helm and started sailing away from the _Dauntless_ while Will went around cutting off all the ropes connecting to the other boat. Jack looked back at a surprised Commodore.

"Thank you, Commodore, for helping us make way!" He swiped his hat off in a bow.

"We couldn't have done it without you!" Xio yelled and waved an arm at him.

"Nice one Xio." Alexia came up and gave her a high five.

"Race to the bottom?" Xio asked eyeing the stairs banisters.

Alexia nodded walking to the edge of the stairs. She ran a hand over the railing, jumped up and slid very quickly on it. She practically flew off the banister into a pile of rope. She laughed the entire way down and even after the crash. She even laughed when Xio came crashing down the banister and landed on top of her in a heap of clothing. They watched from the pile of ropes, now arranged into conformable chairs, as Will sharpen his cutlass.

"For a man whose made an industry of avoiding boats, you're a quick study." Alexia commented. Will looked up from his work.

"How did you know I was afraid of boats?" Will asked inspecting the blade of his cutlass and testing it's sharpness by cutting a loose string from his shirt. Alexia shrugged.

"I've already told you Will. I know a lot of things. Like you worked passage from England as a cabin boy after your mother passed. You were looking for your father." Alexia patted Will's back. Xio nodded.

"Sorry about your mum." She said quietly. Will nodded.

"Is that so?" Jack asked casually. Alexia cocked her pistol at Jack.

"Enough out of you, back to captaining Captain." She swung her gun with quick fingers before placing it back in its holster.

"My father. William turner, you knew him right?" Will questioned trying to get an answer from Jack but he remained silent. Xio raised her eyebrow at Will and went back to cleaning her nails.

"I'm not a simpleton Jack." Will said losing his patience.

"Here, Here!" Alexia cheered. Will gave her a look but Alexia gave it right back, ten fold.

"At the jail- it was only after you learned my name that you agreed to help." Will smiled.

"Since that's what I wanted, I didn't press the matter But now-"

He pointed his sword at Jack in accusation.

"You knew my father."

Alexia clapped her hands together and got to her feet so she could stand between Jack and Will.

"What if he did Will?" Alexia said angrily holding up her hands, palms out.

"You've got a ship and a truth to the blue Captain willing to help you find your stole lady. Your life is pretty good right now if you don't mind me saying." Alexia laughed slightly.

"I knew him." Jack piped up. Alexia hung her head and walked over to the wheel Jack was steering. When she sat on the railing and Jack was sure she would not throw him overboard he continued.

"Probably one of the few who knew him as William Turner. Most everyone just called him Bill, or Bootstrap Bill." Jack said truthfully. Alexia sighed her spot on the railing; leaning back and watching the clouds chug by. Xio still sat at her rope throne mimicking Jack and Will with her hands like sock puppets, only without the socks.

"Bootstrap?" Will asked baffled at his father's name. Jack looked up from the wheel and shook his head. He then strolled around the deck tightening ropes here and there to do something. Will followed him.

"Good man. Good Pirate." Jack looked to Will for a reaction. He pointed at Will with a certain swagger.

"I swear you look just like him."

"Stop Jack. You're making it worst." Alexia called from the railing. A sarcastic smile gracing her lips.

"It's not true," Will said angrily shifting his focus to Alexia then back to Jack, "my father was not a pirate."

"Figured you wouldn't want to hear it." Xio shook her head and leaned back on her rope throne so she could sleep.

"No! My father was a good respectable man who obeyed the law, followed the rules-" Will began but Alexia cut him short.

"You think your father is the only man who ever lived the Glasgow life? Telling folk one thing, and going off to do another?" She propped herself up on her elbow to look Will straight in the eye.

"There's quite a few who would leave home for the sea, hoping to amass enough swag to ease the burdens of their respectable life. And they're all "Good Respectable Men"." Alexia said with air quotes.

"He was not a pirate!" Will huffed pulling out his sword and leveling it at Jack. Alexia sat up and pinned him down with a disbelieving glare. Jack turned slightly from the wheel and sighed.

"Put it away boy. It's not worth getting beat again." Jack bobbled his head while Alexia got up quick as a flash and threw the wheel to the right. The sail boom whipped around hitting Will hard in the chest, sweeping him off the ship. As his sword clattered to the deck Will managed to hang on to the boom, dangling above the open ocean. Jack moved forward to pick up Will's fallen sword and poke him with it. Will hand-over-hands his way to the end of the boom, just out of reach from the sword. Alexia took the wheel again still watching the show with a jaded expression. Xio snored gently in her chair.

"As long as you're just hanging there, pay attention. Must, Should, do, don't, shall, shall not -- those are just suggestions. There are only two absolute rules," Jack ticked them off on his fingers.

"What a man can do. And what a man can't do." Will looked to a pod of dolphins swimming a few feet away, uninterested in what Jack was saying.

"For instance," Alexia stood next to Jack and leaned forward on the railing.

"You can accept that your father was a pirate and still a good man…" Will noticed a glint in her eye, "or you can't."

Alexia turned on a heel and rubbed her chin.

"Now, we could let you drown." This caught Will's attention quick. Alexia flipped her hair and looked at Will from over her shoulder.

"But I sure as hell won't be helping Jack sail this thing to Tortuga, so..." She gave Jack a knowingly look and he swung the wheel back in so Will was not hanging over the deck. Will, exhausted at this point, let go of the boom and landed in the rope pile next to Xio. She gave a start and jumped to her feet yawning.

"I'm up!" Xio shouted raising both her hands in the air, her eyes were still half closed. Alexia clapped.

"I give you a ten for the jump and an about an eight for the landing." She giggled but Xio was already trudging toward the stairs the sit for a moment. Jack walked over to Will and offered the hilt of his very own sword to him. Will took it under the cool glare Jack was giving him. Alexia nodded.

"Alrightly then boys. Pick up your toys and play nice now. Oh and Will!" Alexia held a hand out to him. He looked up at her.

"Sorry for doing that but denial is not a good look for you." Alexia said in a genuine tone, shaking her head.

"It's okay." Will smiled at Alexia, she slung an arm around his shoulders.

"Plus for someone who claims he would have never become a pirate you're on a rip roaring good start." Alexia bit her lip to keep her smile hidden.

"Any advice Jack?" She asked smirking slightly.

"Yeah, smile and enjoy." His lips twisted into a crude smile.

"Good show then. Well, where to now Capitán?" Alexia saluted. Xio was now stretched across the bottom step, snoozing.

"Tortuga." Xio announced from here slumber. Will gave her sleeping form a fleeting look.

"Tortuga?" Will asked as he snaked an arm around Alexia's waist. Jack raised his eyebrow.

"Aye, Tortuga." Jack turned the wheel a little to the right and looked out at the horizon.

* * *

The _OH NO!_ And _Take it down a few notches and put your hand down _are inside jokes from stupid TV shows and my step-dad getting mad at my sister and I for waving at him like stupid fan girls when he was only two feet away.


	11. Singin'and Dancin' on Tortuga Nights

Here's some new stuff. If I could go out on a limb I'd say this chapter is everything the chapter title says it is. Singin' and Dancin' in Tortogua at night. Easy enough right? That and some slaps in the facial area and FOB and Panic!

_Ve viva la musica!_ Long live the music!

**POTC is not for me. Well, I don't own it.**

* * *

Alexia sat in the empty galley with a knife in one hand and a star fruit she had found at the bottom of a barrel in the other. Will came through the door whistling to himself. He jumped when he noticed her.

"Oh. There you are." Will said joyfully. Alexia raised her eyebrows so high she though she might have strained a muscle in forehead. She then looked around to see if he was talking to her.

"Why? Were you looking for me?" Alexia asked cutting another piece of fruit and offering it to Will. He shook his head.

"You sure. It prevents scurvy." Alexia shaking the piece of fruit until Will gave in and took it. He sighed as he ate and Alexia leaned back in her chair, placing her boot clad feet on the table.

"So what's up?" Alexia asked sucking the juice out of a piece of starfruit.

"Nothing. I mean I was not looking for you. Not that you are hard to look at. I mean you are nice to look at, very nice. I mean… that's not what I mean." Will rambled for the queen. Alexia cocked a suspicious eyebrow at him.

"Okay Will. If you're done I'm going to go back on deck, 'mkay." Alexia slammed her chair back on the floor and prepared to get up but was stopped when WIll placed his hand on hers. She looked at his hand then sucked her teeth as she looked him straight in the eye.

"What?" Will looked scared at having her full attention. He flinched nervously.

"Well… I just want to clear up what I said…" he began but Jack's shouting interrupted him.

"Whelp! Where have you gone to now?" The good old Captain yelled. Alexia looked up to the ceiling, Will followed her gaze confused as usual.

"That's you." She clarified taking her hand away. She started for the door with Will hot on her heels like a basset hound puppy.

"Have you seen Xio?" Alexia asked giving Will a sideways glance.

"No, why?" Will asked as confused turned into puzzlement.

"No reason." Alexia said shaking it off. They walked on deck to where Jack was peering into his spyglass viewing the dock in Tortuga for an open spot. When Jack shut his spy glass and looked to Will and Alexia he drew back from Will.

"What happened to your face?" He asked staring at Will's face in horror. Alexia gave a half shrug.

"Xio got to him." She turned to look at Will. His face was covered in miss matching streaks of make up, his cheeks buried in rogue, and his hair was in a French braid. Xio had gotten him while he was napping below deck, Alexia guessed. When Xio did come out from the Captain's Quarters she started laughing like the retard she was. Alexia joined in. Jack took the moment to take a crack at Xio's work.

"If you wanted to be a eunuch you should find a better shade of lipstick." Jack laughed as Will ran over to a barrel filled with rain water and stared at his reflection. He gasped and slashed water onto his face until the make up dripped off. Xio grabbed her stomach from laughing.

* * *

A narked Will, giggling Xio, and hyperactive Alexia followed Jack as he led the way through Tortuga. Will stuck close to Jack now, looking behind his shoulder at Xio and Alexia who smiled evilly. Will now knew he would have to watch his back with those crazy young ladies.

"Jack, I'm not too sure about those two ladies. Maybe we should have left them." Will whispered looking back again to make sure the girls weren't listening.

"Yes well, we can't now." Jack huffed. Will, however, shrugged.

"Jack, you have seen them right? They can take care of themselves here, with a sword and a gun. I'd be more afraid for the safety of the people here than theirs." Will tried to reason.

"Nah, I'm more afraid of what they'd do ta us if we leftem here." Jack winced as if he could already feel Alexia tackling him to the ground and Xio's dagger held to his neck.

Alexia walked with both hands covering her nose as she passed a sleeping drunk. Xio laughed then gagged when the wonderfully rancid smells that had bombarded her nose could now be tasted on her tongue. Will looked around disgusted while Jack, however, outstretched his arms to take in the beauty.

"Well, what do you think?" He stopped and looked at his group with a big smile. Alexia and Xio reflected his smile and gave the thumbs up. When he turned to Will, though, they mimicked hurling into the nearest barrel making him laugh.

"It'll linger." Will looked over at man drowning himself with rum.

"Yeah it'd be great if I was blind and couldn't smell!" Xio pinched her nose and nudged Alexia in the ribs with her elbow. She perked up.

"Yes, I absolutely hate it here." Alexia stepped forward smiling in her mad crazy way then slapped Jack so hard he stumbled back. Alexia raised an eyebrow at Xio, making her step forward too.

"Yeah." Xio shouted and backhanded Jack with the same force as Alexia. Jack regained his composure and moved beside Will again, touching his face gingerly.

"Right you two will be left here if ya do that again." He pointed a ringed finger at both of them in turn. They simultaneously put their arms up in defense then crossed them and glared at Jack.

"Back to business. If every port in the world were like this, no man would ever feel unwanted." Xio looked over at some greasy, dirt covered, drunken, pirate and his whore.

"Yeah right." She scoffed.

"Look here comes Scarlett. He might have said we couldn't slap him but with her that'll make three." Alexia said pointing three fingers at Scarlett then laughing when a man tied to a run away cart went by. Jack gave Alexia a look as she pretended to scratch her arm with the three fingers she had held up.

"How do you know… Scarlett!" Jack turned to face the wench. She wore a bright red dress that matched her hair, a mask of thick white foundation, and red lipstick. Alexia gave her a look then turned to Will.

"And the fun ensues!" She whispered smiling in that mad crazy way again. Xio and Will both smiled too.

The red head walked up smiling, slapped Jack, and walked triumphantly away. Jack looked at Xio who nodded.

"Not sure I deserved that." He shook his head and saw another wench walking towards him.

"Ah, Giselle!"

" 'Ho was she?"

"What?" Jack was slapped and shrunk back, cradling his head in his hands.

"You may have deserved that, right Jack?" Xio asked sarcastically, hi-fiving Alexia then turned to Will with her hand raised. He hi-fived her then looked at his hand, Xio and Alexia mirrored the same look of confusion.

"How do you know how to hi-five?" Xio asked but Will shook his head.

"I followed what you did." Alexia raised an eyebrow.

"Ooo smart and good-looking. That's so hard to come by nowadays." Alexia smacked Will on the back as he blushed again. Xio followed Jack into a near by pigsty where they found Mr. Gibbs sleeping.

"Wow look nasty dirt caked pirate sleeping with pigs!" Alexia ran forwards and proceeded to jump up and down like a crazed fan girl waiting to take a picture with the members of Panic.

"Yes, not one of Mr. Gibbs' finer moments huh Jack?" Xio crossed arms and sighed.

"Indeed not!" Jack shouted picking up a bucket of water and handed another to Xio.

"You don't want to arm me with a blunt object Jack. Unless you're extremely stupid and enjoy being hit over the head with hard things." Xio rolled her eyes and examined her nails, with a bored expression on her face. Jack seemed baffled but recovered quickly and handed off the bucket to Will.

"What no bucket for me?" Alexia asked sadly, making tears appear out of nowhere. A very useful talent passed down from her father's genes.

"Oh... I well sorry, here take it then." Jack grabbed the bucket back from Will and held it out to Alexia. She looked at the bucket and threw her head back with mad witch crackling laughter.

"Nah I'm fantastmic!" Alexia said grinning widely as she wiped away her real fake tears. Jack however did not find this funny and rolled his eyes, huffing like an angry buffalo.

"Fine!" He shouted and threw the water on Mr. Gibbs making him, and the pigs, wake up instantly.

"Curse ya far breathin ya slack jawed idiot!" He shouted stabbing his dagger around in a drunken unthreatening way. Xio and Alexia shared a look then elbowed Will in the ribs.

"That's your new crew mate! Shiny." Xio leaned in to whispered, Will gave Mr. Gibbs a once over then gagged.

"Yeah that's how I feel." Alexia whispered as she straightened up.

"You done with that Will?" Alexia asked gesturing to the bucket in his hands.

Xio, however, knew better and backed up towards Jack so she would not get wet. She had a hunch about what Alexia was about to do. It was, after all, her favorite game to play on unsuspecting victims at 6th period lunch. Will looked at Alexia dumbly and before he could offer up a respond she smacked the bucket right out of his hands, with great force, and towards Mr. Gibbs. Of Course, Mr. Gibbs offered his respond to being doused with water once more.

"I'm already awake!" He exclaimed, fuming under his watery exterior. Alexia crossed her arms and turned towards him in a deliberately slow manner.

"That, tubby, was for your reeking odor." She was so unnaturally serious that no one dared laugh until Mr. Gibbs nodded his head in agreement.

"To the Faithful Bride then!" Xio yelled pointed her finger to the sky like Lady Liberty.

* * *

Will, Alexia, and Xio stood in a noisy chaos that was the Faithful Bride as Jack got Mr. Gibbs and himself a drink. Jack came waltzing by and stood alarmingly close to Will, which made Xio and Alexia freak out completely.

"GAY ORGY! Ewwww." They whispered among themselves. Alexia however leaned forwards and smacked the mug out of Jack's relaxed hand. She smiled when he glared at her.

"Whatcha goin do about it _pansy_." She practically spit out the last word so Jack knew he shouldn't even try.

"Nevermind." He grabbed some other blokes' drink and quickly made his way over to Mr. Gibbs muttering quietly.

"Those two aren't normal Jack." Mr. Gibbs pointed out.

"You have no idea." Jack cringed into his seat.

"Yeah that's right. You betta run JACK SPARROW!" Alexia yelled over the noisy crowd. Xio gave her an alarmed look.

"Crikey, Alexia calm down." Alexia gave her that scary smile again.

"Like Lady Liberty!" Alexia sang danced in the middle of the crowd.

"She rains over all she sees!" Xio sang along," She's beauty and she's grace! She's Mrs. United States!"

Some couples from the bar even joined in on the dancing but Alexia managed to flop down on Will's lap just as the conversing old men were about to say the "leverage" bit. Will heard some of it when a rogue sailor wrapped his arms around Alexia and pulled her to him.

"WILL!" Alexia shouted kicking to pirate down. Will reacted by drawing both his cutlass and dagger, kicking down a near by table for cover, and pointing both blades at the sailor. He scrambled up and out of the bar faster than a scared raccoon stuck up a chimney.

"Wow, my hero! Aren't you just the shiz?" Alexia gave Will the thumbs up complete with a wink and big grin.

"Kid's a bit of a stick, isn't he?" Gibbs asked downing the rest of his drink. Jack sighed.

"That he is" He answered as walked back over to his group. He observed the still dancing couples and Xio now singing "I've Got All This Ringing In My Ears And Not On My Fingers" by Fall Out Boy. He sighed again.

"Oh Jack, how was your little talk?" Alexia smiled in a sweet way, Jack raised an eyebrow.

"What have ya done now?" Jack asked impatiently as if Alexia was his daughter trying to convince him that giving her extra pocket money to buy a new pair of flats was the most ethical choice he had when it came to spending his money.

"Dunno but I love that jacket on you." Alexia gestured to his jacket as Jack gave her an odd look. Will's eyebrows furrowed.

"Let's go back to the ship. Gibbs will meet us in the morin to show us his crew." Jack walked out of the bar shaking his head. Will followed Alexia and Xio, who had linked arms and had begun to sing "But It's Better If You Do" by Panic, out into the night silently mouthing the words to the girls "Lady Liberty" song.

"STOP being a EUNUCH!" They yelled over their shoulders, clicking their heels and skipping merrily to Jack who was trying to hide under his hat.

* * *

I love the word eunuch because no one knows what I'm saying about them. And if they do then they're going to have to be my new POTC friend. Lovely Review.


	12. Stupid Ghosty Ship Trip

I like the ghosty ship trip cause it shows the true side of the ghosty dead pirates. That and Elizabeth is a totally spazz when it comes to the tight rope. I love the scene though. It was some good special effects. Oh, Chelsea likes to eat. Alot. She eats two slices of pizza and fries at lunch everyday but she's still skinny. Don't you just hate that? And yeah Chelsea's a real person. Duh.

**Walt as the rights to Pirates of the Caribbean. Not me, sadly.**

* * *

Chelsea sighed for what seemed to be the millionth time since she had boarded the Black Pearl. Elizabeth was no help either, hiding in a corner crying like a baby. What a pansy ass, Chelsea thought as she sighed again.

"Elizabeth you're going to be needed soon." Chelsea walked over to Elizabeth and sat down beside her. Elizabeth looked paler then Draco Malfoy in the Half-Blood Prince. Damn Xio and Alexia and their Harry Potter book reading.

"How can you be so calm?" Elizabeth stuttered but Chelsea only smiled evilly.

"You haven't seen the half of it, yet." Chelsea looked up as someone burst through the doors without knocking.

"Oi! You best exit this room and knock next time if you don't want the Kraken send after yah!" Chelsea roared standing up quickly. Ragetti and Pintel looked at each then left the room tripping over themselves. Two seconds later they knocked on the door.

"Come in please." Chelsea said pleasantly, smoothing down the front of her dress. Ragetti and Pintel came in, still shaking, and addressed Elizabeth.

"The Captain has requested your presence for tonight, you and Mrs. Scott." Pintel recited as if he were reciting stems for English class.

"It's Miss Scott. I'm not bloody married." Chelsea sneered, Ragetti smiled.

"Oh, someone such as you should be married!" He said excitingly. The rest of them shared a confused look.

"Shoulda, coulda, woulda but sadly haven't yet. When Shane's old enough maybe." She stared dreamily off into space, Ragetti's smiled faded.

He uttered a soft, "Oh".

"Tell your Captain I am disinclined the acquiesce his request." Elizabeth declared snottily making Chelsea laughed.

"Yeah right. If there's food we'll be there." Elizabeth looked at Chelsea in disbelief but Chelsea glared at her.

"I'm hungry, aren't you?" She snarled giving Elizabeth no choice but to nod her head.

"Right then off you go, pip pip, cheerio and all that British crap." Chelsea shooed Pintel and Ragetti away and grabbed the dress from them, before shutting the door. She threw the maroon dress at Elizabeth's head.

"Get changed." Chelsea said as she moved a chair in front of a suspicious hole in the wall. Elizabeth started to put on the dress.

"Why did you do that?" She asked, buttoning the front of her dress. Chelsea rummaged in her bag and with drew a pair of pants, a belt, a white shirt, and brown boots.

"Because I don't want a crowd to watch me undress." Chelsea's voice was muffled as she pulled on her shirt.

* * *

Ten minutes later the both of them sat in the Captain's Quarter as a great feast that had been laid before them. Captain Barbossa sat at the head of the table watching Elizabeth's "eat like a bird" antics. Mean while Chelsea tore through three pieces of bread smothered in butter, two chicken legs, and a handful of grapes. She now worked her way through a rather large chunk of salted pork.

"Mmm this is so good." She said nudging Elizabeth with her elbow. Elizabeth looked at her greased covered hands in disgust because Chelsea had forgotten her silverware.

"Fine be that way BETCH!" Chelsea practically shouted as she went back to her pork. Elizabeth sighed before taking a small bite of her own pork leg.

"There's no need to stand on ceremony, no call to impress anyone. You must be hungry." Barbossa managed to sound at least semi-concerned. As Elizabeth started eating like a starved dog. Barbossa poured both ladies some wine.

"Here try the wine." Elizabeth snatched her goblet while still stuffing her face. Chelsea simply let the glass skid across the table towards her. Barbossa still watched Elizabeth who, well lets put it this way she didn't look like a Governor's daughter anymore. Barbossa held an apple in his outstretched, semi shaking hand.

"And an apple. One of those next." He leered. Elizabeth looked up at him and dropped her bread. The creepy monkey licked his lips but Chelsea continued to eat.

"It's poisoned." She gasped.

"Yeah right like he has the balls to poison me. Besides he doesn't need to kill you yet. But as I have said too much already, I'll let Barbossa tell you about the curse and the blood to be repaid."

"So Barbossa, what's it gonna take to get off this rinky dink boat anyways?" Chelsea wiped her fingers clean on the shirt of a pirate servant standing behind her. He mumbled something before leaving the room to clean his shirt. One down, only one stupid Captain to go.

"Well Miss, with that attitude I'm bettin' ya know what this here medallion is hmm?" Barbossa held up the necklace for Chelsea to barely glance at.

"Yeah I've seen it around. You know, old Cortez and his crazy curses. Selfish bastard still owes me some gold too." Chelsea leaned her chair back on two legs propping her boot clad feet on the table and proceeded in throwing grapes at that stupid monkey.

"Hmm that's interesting." Barbossa said slowly before telling Elizabeth the tale of how she is of further value to him and why Aztec gold was awesome. Then how they were cursed men and ghost stories were real. He then went over to feed his zany monkey a cracker and give it the gold coin. While Chelsea pondered why giving a monkey a cracker made more sense than feeding a parrot a cracker while Elizabeth concealed a butter knife within her napkin.

"That's not going to do you any good. Believe me ghostly pirates hate being stabbed when they're already dead-ish." Chelsea wagged a finger at Elizabeth and turned back to Barbossa.

"Thanks to ye. We have the gold." Barbossa said cryptically petting his monkey.

"And the blood to be repaid?" Elizabeth questioned, a puzzled expression stamped across her face. Chelsea smiled evilly.

"That's why there be no sense in killin ya just yet." Chelsea cackled as Elizabeth sprung from her seat. Barbossa moved forward to grab her but backed away when she branded her knife. She huffed angrily like a lama as she headed towards the door, only to be cornered by Barbossa. They did a dance around a support beam of the ship before slamming in to each and Elizabeth, in a fit of fear, stabbed Barbossa in the heart. Chelsea, who had been trying to get the gold necklace back from the stupid monkey, looked up just in time.

"Hey Barbossa you got a knife in your… you know what never mind." Chelsea said with a wave of her hand and brought it back to smack the monkey off the table. It screeched at her before disappearing into a hole in the wall.

"I'm curious. After killin me what is it yah planned to do next?" Barbossa smirked as Elizabeth ran out of the room and into the jumble of dead yet still alive pirates. Chelsea laughed as Elizabeth ran around screaming like a banshee as the pirates messed with her.

"Ahh this is fun. Hey Barbossa can I take some extra food with me? I mean its not like you're going to eat it right? Ya know doggy bag it." Chelsea smiled sweetly at her comment, Barbossa nodded.

"Alrighty then. I'll save an apple for you _mon Capitan_!" She said the last bit in Spanish. So as Elizabeth was thrown around the ship in a processional of acrobatic stunts screaming for her life Chelsea stocked up on fruit, bread, and meat. When Elizabeth made her way back to Barbossa so he could grab her Chelsea folded up her napkin of food and placed it in her bag.

"Look!" He instructed as he forcibly turned Elizabeth around to face the zombie crew.

"The moon rise shows us for what we really are. We are not among the living and so we cannot die. But neither are we dead." Barbossa sounded like an old wise Indian telling a ghost story. So cool, Chelsea thought as she moved forward towards Elizabeth. She was whimpering like a scared jackalope.

"For too long I've been parched of thirst and unable to quench it. Too long I've been starving to death and haven't died." Barbossa whispered, slowly moving towards Elizabeth making her back away closer to the moonlight.

"I feel nothing. Not the wind on my face or the spray of the sea. Or the warmth of a woman's flesh." Barbossa held out a hand to caress Elizabeth's face but she screamed as it turned into a skeleton hand.

"You best start believing in ghost stories Miss Turner. You're in one." He finished his speech and stepped into the moon light full on. He then produced a bottle, pulled the cork top off, and drank the wine within. The wine then fell through his bones staining them red. Elizabeth screamed Bloody Murder before high tailing it into her quarters. Chelsea stood watching Barbossa slam the doors shut behind Elizabeth and turning to laugh with his crew.

"What are ya looking at? Back to work!" He said watching to crew scrabble back to work. He turned to Chelsea.

"And what are you doin? Aren't you scared?!" He yelled loudly trying to mess with Chelsea but she just wiped his rancid spit from her face.

"No, actually, I'm not afraid. Because I know someone else who isn't human, just pure evil and a lot creepier than you. Michael Meyers. All he does is walk slowly towards you taking his time. Cause he know he's going to get you. It's not a matter of how but a matter of when." She said in a hushed tone, the sea breeze blowing her hair across her face so she looked like a tatter ghost in the moonlight. Barbossa shivered.

"Is he real?" He asked looking around the ship. The crew had disappeared and it was just Chelsea and Barbossa still there.

"Yes and he always gets who he wants." She whispered looking around the ship too.

"And he wants you Barbossa!" Chelsea screamed pointing at him. She then ran into the room with Elizabeth. When she looked back Barbossa had his gun and cutlass out trying to find Michael Meyers before he found him.

"What did you do?" Elizabeth stuttered. She looked like a bad train wreck where the train hits a nuclear plant and blows up the whole town.

"Nothing. I just put the fear of Michael Meyers into Barbossa." She giggled before telling Elizabeth the tail of Michael Meyers. Elizabeth then told Chelsea every pirate story she knew in return.

"You know, you're not so bad Elizabeth." Chelsea curled up on in her bed and snuggled down into the sheets.

"I like you too Chelsea. I've never really had any girl friends. It's nice." She yawned widely.

"Yep and don't worry Elizabeth. You'll be a great pirate." Chelsea said before falling asleep surprised that Barbossa had given each of them a bed.

* * *

Michael Meyers is DA BOMB! He's so cool how he strolls towards you knowing that where ever you go he's going to get you. It's just so creepy without the whole blood and gore. Anyways Review. _Please-kay-thanks!_


	13. Good Magic but Bad Luck

Here's the next chapter and I am so sorry for taking so long on these. I have a few chapters under my belt so I can keep my peeps entertained. Now it's time to find a new crew that will sail under Jack Sparrow while the girls express their magically powers and have some more smacking sprees!

Oh and by the way you should say god bless when someone sneezes, just in case. I said bless you to someone and they turned on me saying," Oh I didn't know you were the lord." I hit them, and I'm not proud of it but please say GOD bless you. Some people are just Soooo Damn Sensitive. Pansies.

**Don't Own Pirate. Nope, Nope, Nope.**

* * *

The next morning Jack took Will, Alexia, and Xio down to the docks to meet the new crew. Jack and Will had been forced into giving Xio and Alexia piggy back rides because their feet hurt from their boots. When Jack pointed out how much of a baby they were both being Alexia pointed out how Jack looked fat in his hat. Jack, of course, got angry and tried to haul Alexia overboard but she was to fast and held a pistol steadily in front of his face.

"Piggy Back Ride. NOW!" She shouted poking Jack in the nose with the pistol so all he could do was sigh and let her climb onto his back.

And here they were, in the sun shiny day staring at the pitiful excuse for a crew that Mr. Gibbs had rounded up.

"Feast your eyes Captain. All of them, faithful hands before the mast, every man worth his salt. And crazy to boot." Mr. Gibbs announced proudly. Xio snorted from her seat on Will's back.

"Please they're rancid and retarded _to boot_." She mocked kneeing Will in the ribs to move forward and holding his hair in her two hands like reins.

"So this is your able bodied crew?" Will asked sarcastically. Jack turned to the pirate Cotton and pointed at him with the little green banana in his hand.

"You sailor." Jack looked to Mr. Gibbs for a name but Alexia answered for him.

"Cotton stupid. His name is Cotton!" Alexia said braiding the free flowing hair into little plaids, her legs squeezed Jack's middle as she wrestled to hold on and keep braiding.

"Mr. Cotton do you have the courage and the fortitude to follow orders and stay true in the face a danger and almost sudden death?" Jack questioned, when Cotton didn't answer Jack huffed and puffed like the big bad wolf.

"Mr. Cotton answer me!" Jack shouted in his face, Alexia smacked him in the back of his head.

"He's mute you tard. Had his tongue cut out so he trained the parrot to talk for him. No ones yet figured how though." Alexia informed as Cotton opened his mouth in a disgusting fashion to show a sliver of tongue in the back on his throat. Jack grimaced while Mr. Gibbs gave Alexia a look. She noticed his stare as she let loose the tight plaids.

"How'd ya know that?" He asked. A smile blossomed on her lips.

"Ahhh… That would be cause I'm magic. We both are." Alexia gestured to Xio and herself before jumping off Jack's back in a ballerina style. Once she landed she started dancing around again. Xio joined her and they started square dancing behind Will.

"Magic like her…" Gibbs trailed off but Alexia knew what he was thinking about.

"No, but Tia Dalma sends her love. We're a different kind of magic. Good, crazy, call it what you will." She clarified with a flick of her hand.

"Well… um Mr. Cotton' parrot. Same question." Jack eyed the parrot.

"Wind in the sails. Wind in the sails." The parrot squawked failing around.

"Polly want a cracker?" Alexia teased the parrot and made squawking noises.

"Mostly we figure that means yes." Mr. Gibbs supplied. Xio laughed.

"Why wouldn't it?" She chuckled.

"CHAW!" Alexia shrieked, flapping her arms like a bird.

"Course it does. Satisfied?" He turned to Will who still looked unimpressed.

"Well you've proven they're mad." Will countered. Alexia laughed.

"They'll fit in nicely then won't they?" She said smiling at Will in a weird cross-eyed way.

"And what are the benefits for us?" A voice demanded angrily. Jack looked down the dock and started towards the person.

"Oh my god it's Annamaria. I loved her so much!" Alexia ran forward and jumped up and down in front of her. When Jack looked down and removed the sailor's hat Alexia screamed.

"YAY!" She ran forward and hugged Annamaria who cringed away.

"What is this?" She asked surprised, hugging Alexia back.

"Would you take her if I said she was your daughter?" Jack said massaging his temples with his pointer fingers and closing his eyes. Alexia smiled at Annamaria who looked even more confused.

"Alexia I suggest you move aside." Xio grabbed Alexia's shoulder and pulled her back.

"Annamaria. Go ahead with your face smacking spree." Xio gestured to Jack. Something dawned on Anna's face when Xio said this and she proceed in slapping Jack across the face, hard too.

"Guess you didn't deserve that one, huh?" Will asked haughtily. He, Xio, Annamaria, and Alexia shared a smile.

"No. That one I deserve." He turned back to Annamaria.

"Yeah you deserve it big time for stealing her boat!" Alexia shouted and smacked him across the face in the same matter as Annamaria. Annamaria crossed her arms and nodded at Alexia.

"She could be my daughter." She agreed.

"Borrowed! Borrowed without permission with every intention of bringing it back to you!" Jack explained quickly but Annamaria narrowed her eyes.

"But you didn't!" She shouted, Alexia crossed her arms and glared at Jack. Jack swore they looked too much alike.

"You'll get another one!" Jack improvised. Alexia grabbed a fist full of his stupid puffy pirate shirt.

"She will!" Alexia shook Jack from his shirt collar.

"A better one." Xio chimed in, Will's smile widened.

"A better one!" Jack scrambled. He knew better than to take on Alexia _and_ Annamaria.

"That one." Will pointed over Jack to the _Interceptor_.

"What one?" Jacks head snapped up. Everyone turned towards the _Interceptor _and back towards Jack questioning, who did a double take before turning to Will again.

"That one?" Jack growled but rethought the decision when he saw Annamaria's face.

"Aye. That one. What do you two say about it?" Alexia and Annamaria shared a look.

"Aye!" They shouted at the same time as Annamaria snatched her hat from Jack. Alexia and Xio linked arms and walked down the dock with Anna leaving Jack, Will, and Mr. Gibbs by themselves.

"No no no… its frightful bad luck to bring a woman on board Sir. Not to mention havin three!" Mr. Gibbs looked back at the group of girls. Jack looked up at the sky as if searching for something to save him, god maybe.

"It'd be worse not to have them." Jack played with his little banana and walked towards the ship leaving Gibb's and Will to stare at the sky wondering what Jack had seen.

* * *

The seas were a rage of fifty foot waves and side ways rain. The Interceptor rocked back and forward and up and down. Alexia and Xio held onto the railing for dear life as the Interceptor swayed violently to the left again and a wave crashed over them.

"JACK!" Alexia screamed as loud as she could, which edges toward bullhorn status, until Jack turned towards her.

"You and Xio should be in my quarters and not out here!" He yelled back holding his hat to his head. He looked down at his compass and turned the wheel sharply left.

Alexia stuck her tongue out at him before grabbing Xio hand tightly and make her way over to Will and Gibbs. They were busy tying down a rope that had come loose and were shouting at each other over the wind.

"How can we sail to an island that no body can find with a compass that doesn't work?" Will shouted pulling at the rope. Alexia and Xio practically latched themselves onto him when another wave threatened to wash them away.

"We're looking for an island not the north pole Will!" Xio yelled in response. Will gave her a confused look before he turned to Gibbs for an explanation but he had gone. He was now making his way shakily up the stairs to talk to Jack with Alexia strapped to his back.

"We should drop canvas Sir!" Gibbs shouted holding onto the stair railing for support while Alexia tittered behind him.

"She can hold a bit longer!" He shouted back looking rather bracingly holding on so tightly to his wheel that his knuckles were white.

"I give you fifteen minutes to stop being crazy or I will beat you within an inch of your death!" Alexia bellowed but Jack seemed very unaffected by it, infuriating her even more. She threw her arms up and huffed off in the direction of the stairs.

"What's in your head that's put you in such a fine mood Captain?" Gibbs asked looking after Alexia. She grabbed both Will and Xio by the hand and hauled them into the Captain's Quarters.

"We're catching up." Jack replied smiling in Alexia's special psychotic way.

* * *

This chapter is kinda half and half. Read and Review. Oh and get a Wii and play Super Mario Galaxy. It is so fun.


	14. Eyebrows Raised At Silly Cat Ways

Okay so Chelsea and Elizabeth have spent a few days on the rank and disgusting ship so they're kinda friends now. Also Alexia starts hating her favorite character because he's not what she was expecting, Will thinks Alexia and Xio are oracles or something, and Chelsea's had just about enough of her dead entourage. Read and enjoy.

**Don't Own Pirates. I have no snide remark to add this time. Sorry.**

* * *

The Black Pearl made it to Isle de Muerta in record time. The storm was clearing and on the horizon was Isle de Muerta with its intimatingly steep cliffs which were being pounded by the rough slate grey sea . Chelsea and Elizabeth had been finishing off the last of Chelsea's food stash when Pintel and Ragetti came bounding in like a couple of sheep dogs.

"Time to go poppets." Pintel announced but Chelsea held up a hand.

"Hold on. I'm not done!" She stuffed another piece of bread in her mouth before heaving Elizabeth and herself up.

"Come on Elizabeth! It's boat riding time." She pulled Elizabeth forward but stopped cold outside the door. Barbossa stood there holding the gold medallion.

"Come on Miss Turner." Barbossa held out his hand. Elizabeth hesitated but continued forward when Chelsea nodded.

"Don't worry it will be over soon. And Will, Alexia, and Xio will save us." Chelsea stood behind Barbossa as he put the gold medallion around Elizabeth's neck. When he was done they boarded a small boat and Pintel and Ragetti paddled. Elizabeth turned to Chelsea.

"So tell me more about this Shane boy." Elizabeth asked Chelsea who smiled.

"Well I really like him and I think he feels the same way about me but sometimes it's hard to tell cause he and I always fight but everyone in a relationship fights right, but I'd feel a little better if he didn't yell at me so much." Chelsea said very quickly. Pintel and Ragetti looked at each other and rolled their eyes.

"I can't take this girl crap for much longer." Pintel groaned.

"That's too bad then huh fatty?" Chelsea snorted. Elizabeth laughed but covered her mouth and managed to turn it into a hacking cough.

"I'm not fat! I just have weight issues." Pintel said sadly, rubbing his bulging stomach.

"Don't make fun of him!" Ragetti shouted pointing his paddle at Chelsea.

"Whatevs." Chelsea shrugged and went back to talking to Elizabeth until they came up the bank where they anchored.

"It's nice to see weight issues existed in this time period too." Chelsea said to herself helping Elizabeth out of the boat.

"Hey! I thought we tied both your hands?" Ragetti pointed to their Chelsea's hands, she shrugged.

"Oh, your keen. You forgot to tie us up? What kind of pirate are you?" Chelsea looked Ragetti up and down like the sorry excuse for a pirate he was.

"But… I… well… I can't be trusted to do everything!" Ragetti shouted Chelsea's face hardened.

"Don't yell at me cause you messed up!" Chelsea snarled.

"Will both of you be quiet!" Pintel shouted tying Elizabeth's hands up. Chelsea crossed her arms.

"Ass." Chelsea hissed before allowing Pintel to tie up her hands too. When she turned around she almost ran right into Barbossa.

"AH! What the hell is wrong with you?! Popping out of no where like a friggin' jack in the box!" Chelsea shouted throwing her tied hands up in the air, which defeated the purpose of the gesture.

"Hello Miss Scott and Miss Turner." He smiled at her with those nasty rotten teeth of his. Chelsea smiled back at him but when he turned away she gagged. How much longer until she got out of this rank maggot infested pirate capture?

* * *

Alexia and Xio were sharing an apple on the ships railing. Under normal sea barding weather again they relaxed while the others looked over the sides of the ship. They seemed to be sailing into an eerie lagoon.

"Hmm kinda foggy all of a sudden." Alexia said looking out over the wreckage strewn around the _Interceptor. _Cotton's parrot screeched up above them.

"Dead man tells no tales."

"Mood killer." Xio sighed looking down at their variety of sharks swimming about. She took another bite of her green apple, made a sour face, and handed it over to Alexia who did the same.

"Puts a chill in the bones how many honest sailors have been claimed by this passage." Gibbs said standing next to Will. Alexia tapped Will on the shoulder and offered him her apple but he shook his head.

"No thank you." He went back to working on the ship. Xio rolled her eyes and followed Will.

"Whatevs." Alexia shrugged her shoulders, leaped down to the deck, and bounded over to Jack. He was trying to hide his compass from Cotton when Alexia walked up. She smiled.

"So... how's it going?" She dawdled munching on her apple and shutting her eyes as the sour juices stung her tongue. Jack gave her a look.

"What do you want now?" He asked in a pissed off voice, moving his wheel to the left a little. Alexia sighed looking slightly hurt.

"Just cause I came to say hi doesn't mean I have a motive Jackie." Alexia said quietly, watching Will and Xio with a glassy stare. They seemed to be talking and laughing. Jack look surprised at her tone, which was much quieter than he had expected.

"Oh well sorry for…" Jack stumbled over his words. Alexia kept her head turned as she started in the direction of the stairs.

"Getting snippy? It's okay. I seem to have that effect on everyone." She made her way across the deck, towards Xio and Will.

"What's wrong Alexia? Is Jack being a Jackie again? Will go beat him up!" Xio shouted pointing at the Captain leaving Will more confused than ever. Alexia shook her head.

"Nah he's just not turning out to be the funny kick ass pirate I thought he was in the movies. Will hug me!" Alexia wrapped her arms around Will until he hugged her back. She sniffled.

"Thanks." Alexia wiped her eyes and started munching on her apple again. She sat on a barrel with Xio while Will and Gibbs got back to work.

"You girls could help us you know." Will suggested. Alexia laughed.

"Yeah… no." Xio explained since Alexia had gone into silent laughter mode.

"Breath Alexia!" Xio shouted shaking Alexia by her shoulders, making her laugh harder. She started coughing and gasping.

"Wow. I have no idea what came over me!" Alexia exclaimed while she searched her pockets for something. She pulled out a small card taped to a piece of tied string. The card read "_Silent laughter means Alexia's dieing a little on the inside_". Will raised an eyebrow.

"Since you girls know so much about me and Jack could you answer a few questions for me?" Will leaned on the barrel as casual as a camel with sunglasses. Alexia and Xio looked at each other, shared superior look, and then turned to Will nodding.

"How is it Jack came by that compass?" He said out of the corner of his mouth, Jack seemed to be looking straight at him.

"He got it from a friend, Tia Dalma. After that he went to Tortuga looking for a crew to sail with him to Isle de Muerta and find the treasure of Cortez. That was when he was still the Captain of the Black Pearl." Xio supplied gesturing to the apple in Alexia's hand. Alexia gave it to her and watched Will's face.

"What?" Will's head snapped sideways to stare at Xio.

"Don't you just love surprises?" She asked smiling. Will seemed to be lost in thought.

"He failed to mention that." Will said slowly, looking towards the wheel. Alexia raised an eyebrow.

"Why would he?" She gave him a look. Xio nodded.

"He doesn't trust anyone anymore." Xio leaned behind Alexia and laid her head on her shoulder so they looked like the Siamese twin cats from the other Disney movie Lady and the Tramp.

"Not since that night." They said at the same time. Will felt like he was in a different world.

"See three days out on the venture the first mate came up saying that if everything was an equal share then so was the bearings to the treasure." Alexia started.

"So Jack being the man he is he gave up the bearings. Not the smartest of things to do but hey what can you do." Xio shrugged smiling like the Cheshire cat.

"Course that night there was a mutiny. They marooned Jack on an island and left him to die. Well not before he went mad with _hate_." Alexia hissed the last word. Will nodded his head in an all knowing way.

"So that's the reason for all the…" Will then did and impression of Jack's hand movements and swaying from side to side. He stopped and neither Xio nor Alexia laughed. Both girls shared a look before doing an even better impression of Jack, which was Jack's cue to cut his eyes towards the girls and glare at them.

"Reasons got nothing to do with it." Xio murmured she then closed her eyes and left Alexia to tell the rest of the story.

"Now Will." She said softly as not to wake Xio.

"When a pirate is marooned he's given a pistol with a single shot. One shot. Ahh well, that's no good for hunting or being rescued. But after three weeks of a starving belly and thirst that pistol starts to look real friendly." Alexia made a gun shape out of her two fingers and her thumb. She pointed it at Will then at her own head as a silent explanation.

"But Jack escaped that island and he still has that single shot, but he won't use it." Alexia raised an eyebrow.

"Probably why he told you what he did in your Black Smith's workshop. _This shot is not meant for you_." Alexia repeated in an almost perfect Jack voice, grinning from ear to ear.

"Yeah he's saving it for his mutinous first mate." Xio said slowly opening one of her eyes.

"Barbossa." Alexia whispered so softly Will had to lean in to hear it.

"Okay so how did he get off the island?" Will questioned

"Well, apparently" Alexia did air quotes when she said this just incase Will didn't pick up her sarcasm.

"He got drunk, fell asleep in the shallows, and stayed there for three days and nights. By the fourth day the sea life was already trying to eat him so he decided to rope himself a couple a sea turtles and make a raft." Alexia and Xio simultaneously rolled their eyes. Will raised an eyebrow.

"Sea turtles?" He asked in a disbelieving tone. Alexia nodded.

"Yep. Sea turtles, if you choose to accept it as the true." Xio said mockingly.

"The real question is what he used for rope." Alexia said sarcastically, she turned slightly to gaze at a point beyond Will's shoulder. Will turned around coming face to face with Jack.

"Human hair… from my back." Jack stood proudly. Alexia made a disgusted face while Xio wrinkled her nose.

"GROSS!" Alexia screamed covered her eyes with her hands.

"I will never be able to get that image out of my head now." Xio said blinking slowly. Jack shook his head.

"Why don't you let the anchor go Jack and leave us alone, hmm? No one wants to talk to you cause you're such a son of a motherless peasant." Alexia snapped, glaring at Jack until he squeaked like a mouse being stepped on and left.

"So Will why haven't you asked us how we know all this?" She tilted her head to the side looking genuinely confused. The sun was right behind head giving off a radiance that seemed to stun Will.

"I trust you. I know you wouldn't lie to me." Will said touching Alexia's shoulder. Her face softened.

"Aww you're so naïve." She smiled, patting his cheek tenderly before pushing his head away from her face. Xio jumped down from the barrel and stood before the Jack.

"Alexia, Will, and I will are to go ashore. You may come if you want to." Xio announced. Jack raised an eyebrow.

"Why does Alexia have to come?" Jack whined like a five year old.

"How about you shut up Mr. Maturity!" Alexia snarled, getting right in Jack's face. Xio sighed and turned to Mr. Gibbs.

"Mr. Gibbs prepare the boat." Xio said turning back to Jack and Alexia.

"And you two!" Xio pointed a finger at both of them in turn.

"Stop it right now! I swear to GOD! We still have to save Chelsea Alexia, so restrain yourself." Xio narrowed her eyes at Alexia who looked ashamed.

"Fine." Alexia crossed her arms. Jack stuck his tongue out at Alexia.

"And Jack, stop being a Jackie and start acting like a Captain and not a whiny five year old!" Jack's smiled disappeared.

"What if the worst should happen?" Alexia asked smirking.

"Keep to the code." Xio grinned.

"Now let's go find Elizabeth and Chelsea!" Will exclaimed pointing to the boat waiting for the four of them over the edge of the _Pearl_.

* * *

There's just something about that "son of a ..." stuff that gets me think. Like son of the POPE! See the Pope doesn't have a son but it's still hilarious right? Yeah it is. Read and Review.


	15. Backhands and Sneaky Plans

And now I present to you the newest sensation that's sweeping the nation!

Escape Your Fate! In this episode Alexia, Will, Xio, and Jack must save the damsels in distress. That's when everything goes to pieces. Lines are crossed and assumptions made. Not to mention a discovery of something long lost and relationships brewing behind closed doors. Sounds like some type of daytime reality show, does it not? Well, without the coma patients and evil twins of course.

**DoN'T OwN PiRaTeS! Cooleo or is it Coolie-o. Whatev.**

* * *

Elizabeth and Chelsea stood in front of an enormous chest on a pile on treasure. Chelsea's eyes were as wide as the gold coins littering the floor.

"O… M… G!" Chelsea touched a sapphire necklace on the ground next to her foot.

"Do you know how much this would cost!" Chelsea said excitingly, Elizabeth gave her a look.

"Oh, right. It's still cursed." Chelsea nodded touching her nose with her forefinger and pointing it at Elizabeth.

"Nice that you remembered. I would have been very lonely without you." Elizabeth said and smiled widely.

* * *

Will, Alexia, Xio, and Jack all sat in the lifeboat silent as the night before Christmas. Jack who was still angry at Alexia was paddling the boat rather menacingly, Alexia who was still irritated with Jack's presence crossed her arms staring off into space, Will was uncomfortable since only Alexia would talk to him and she currently wasn't talking, and Xio was inspecting the mouth of the small cove.

"What's that noise?" She asked. Everyone leaned forward to hear the rushing of a waterfall growing louder as they floated closer to the opening. Alexia looked to Jack.

"What is that?" She asked mystified at the noise.

"Depends." Jack kept rowing, the boat moved faster through the water.

"Depends on what?" She asked leaning forward to hear him, the water roared louder now. Xio and Will shared a look.

"On whether the stories are all true." Jack stopped rowing, "If they are, that's a waterfall that spills over at high tide, with a certain drop to an underground lagoon. If not-"

The rushing water then tugged the boat forward. Xio tightened her grip on the boats edge.

"-well to late now." He said pulling the oars inside the boat as it rushed forward and plunged into darkness. Alexia kneeled on the floor of the boat and brought everyone down with her. Xio hugged Will close so they wouldn't fall out of the boat. Alexia wrinkled her nose before reaching for Jack, she wasn't planning on drowning today. The longboat tipped as it took a harrowing drop over a short waterfall before landing safely in a gorgeous underwater lagoon. It floated lazily toward a sandy shore across said lagoon.

"Chalk one up for the stories." Jack commented Alexia looked up at him from where she had hidden her face in his chest. She cleared her throat and released him from her grip so she could sit up.

"You made it sound alot worst than it was." Alexia argued crossing her arms and settling into her frozen attitude from earlier. Jack straightened his jacket.

"No need to apologize luv. Your presence was much appreciated." Jack smiled but Alexia only gave him defiant stare. Xio sat up next to stretching her legs so they didn't cramp. Will sat up glancing from Alexia to Jack. Since the boat was still moving by it's self there was no need to row to shore.

"So…" Xio started but didn't bother finishing her sentence when she knew no one was listening.

"Well, Alexia what's the code we are to keep to if the worst should happen?" Will asked trying to make conversation. Alexia glared at Jack.

"Dunno, what do you think Jack?" Alexia asked so sweetly her teeth ached.

"It's pirate code." Jack said narrowing his eyes at Alexia, who smiled slowly, then turned to Will.

"Any man that falls behind… is left behind." Jack said looking back at Alexia; she was still smiling with her head tilted to the side. Will raised both eyebrows.

"No heroes amongst thieves, eh?" Will asked, laying the sarcasm on thick.

"You know for someone who is disgusted by pirates you're well on your way to being one. Well… not yet." Xio said leaning over the boat to glide her finger just over the water's surface. Will gave her a disgusted look.

"But don't worry you're not a very good pirate. Sort of." Alexia said under her breath, Jack's head snapped up.

"What'd you say Alexia?" Will asked leaning towards her to listen in. Alexia smirked.

"Nothin'." Alexia smiled innocently turning to share a look with Xio, who cocked her head towards Will and rolled her eyes. Jack had a look of bamboozlement on his face.

"But you are kinda obsessed with treasure, if you don't mind me saying." Alexia pointed out shrugging her shoulders a little. Will made this weird tutting noise.

"Am not." Will said making that tutting noise all the while. Alexia wrinkled her nose but remained silent. When the longboat was close enough Will leaped out and pulled the boat ashore. Xio and Alexia were the first ones off the boat doing the Spongebob Safety Dance to get the prickly feelings out of their legs. Jack and Will moved forward to sneak a peek at the gathering through a large hole in the wall laden with gold coins and other treasures.

"Not all treasure's silver and gold, mate." Jack said cocking his head towards Elizabeth who stood near a gigantic treasure chest holding the cursed treasure of Cortez. Will's eyes widened when he caught sight of Elizabeth.

"Sometimes it's more than that." Xio whispered from her place beside Will, he turned to look at her. The expression on her face was blank but her eyes were showed compassion, like she knew how he felt. Will nodded slowly before turning back to Elizabeth; he could make out Chelsea standing closely behind her. There was a sharp intake of breath behind the group of three. They all turned around to see Alexia staring at an object in her hand. It was the DVD remote.

"Sorry." She said bowing her head to examine the remote closely.

"Gentlemen, the time has come! Our salvation is nigh! Our torment is near at end." Barbossa's voice carried through the large hole in the wall. They all turned back to the gathering. Alexia leaned in to look for Chelsea; she was behind Elizabeth swaying back and forth on the heels of her feet.

"For ten years we've been tested and tried, and each man jack of you here has proved his mettle a hundred times over and a hundred times again!" Barbossa continued all the pirates cheered loudly.

Alexia punched the air and kicked her leg out and ended up on her knees in the classic guitar stance. Xio had to stuff her whole fist into her mouth to stay relatively quiet. Alexia then rolled her eyes while Xio pretended to lick Will's face. Alexia mouthed, "GROSS" when Will turned to face her. Her eyes grew wide before she turned to poke Jack to the shoulder. Xio giggled on until loud "thud" brought their attention back to the pirate gathering.

"Elizabeth!" Will exclaimed trying to scramble up the opening, unsetting some treasure.

"Not yet!" Xio and Alexia hissed, each grabbing one of his arms and pulling him back down. The crazy zombie monkey looked to the noise.

"Yes, we must wait for the opportune moment." Jack said in an all-knowing way.

"Yeah." Alexia and Xio recited like nasally preps. Jack gave the gathering one last backwards glance before standing up, Will followed with an irritated look.

"When's that? When's it's of greatest profit to you?" Will snapped getting right into Jack's face. Alexia stepped forward.

"Has Jack ever given you a reason not to trust him?" Alexia said crossing her arms and giving Will the look. Jack looked astonished that Alexia was standing up for him.

"Yeah and Will. Do us all a favor, okay? I know it's difficult for you, but please stay here," Xio pointed to the floor," and try not to do anything stupid." She finished slowly just in case Will didn't get it. He narrowed his eyes at Xio then turned Alexia.

"Why are you defending him?" He questioned angrily. Alexia stepped closer to Will, leaning forward so she was nose to nose with him.

"You'll see." Alexia whispered, winking. She turned to Jack and smiled.

"I'll stay with Will. You go on with Xio, 'kay?" She tilted her head to the side.

"Righty-o" Xio saluted grabbing Jack's hand and towing him to the nearest walkway. Alexia moved to the boat and took out an oar. When she turned to Will he gestured to the oar.

"What's that for?" He asked.

"You'll see. Now come on." Alexia beckoned Will with one finger. He hesitated.

"Hurry before they hurt Elizabeth!" She said urgently before disappearing into the walkway. Will followed her after thinking of Elizabeth being cut with the rusty blade in Barbossa's hand. When he finally caught up with Alexia, she was standing over Jack's motionless body with the oar raised high in the air. Xio was already moving Jack's body to the side of the walkway.

"That's what you get for messing with me _Captain Jack Sparrow_." She mocked throwing down the oar and running towards Will.

"Let's go." Alexia tugged on his hand leading him down a passage way to a bank right behind Elizabeth. It was hidden away so Barbossa and his crew couldn't see them. Alexia sat down on the bank and examined the water. Where it would normally slope down it was a three foot drop straight down from the edge. She sighed and tied up her hair.

"Great," Alexia said letting her legs go over the ledge," it's cold too!"

The water went right above her elbows; she motioned for Will to follow.

"What about Jack or Xio?" He asked sliding into the frigid water.

"Xio's going to get the boat ready for when we have to make our exit. And Jack's an ass." Alexia said floating delicately on the water surface so Barbossa couldn't see her, Will followed suit.

"You maid!" Barbossa pointed a now bloody knife at Elizabeth," Your father, what was his name? Was your father William Turner?"

"No." Elizabeth replied cattily.

"Surely not." Chelsea piped up.

"Then where's his child! The child that sailed from England eight years ago, the child in whose veins flows the blood of William Turner. Where?" Barbossa yelled in Elizabeth's face, spraying her with spit. When Elizabeth gave him a disgusted look and didn't answer he backhanded her across the face. She was sent tumbling down the mountain of gold to come to a rest at a bank, the medallion landing a few inches in front of her.

"HEY! That's man handling!" Chelsea yelled pointing a finger at Barbossa face, almost poking his nose.

"You're not allowed to man handle women!" She screeched then went silent when she heard the quiet coo of a pigeon. Chelsea knew this was the signal, so she put a hand to her head and sighed.

"Oh! I feel faint!" Chelsea sighed before tumbling down and landing right next to Elizabeth. Alexia swam over and grabbed Chelsea, she opened her eyes.

"Nice ta see ya pigeon woman. Damn! That hurt like a bitchnezz." Chelsea then gasped when the water made contact with her skin.

"Yep. It's cold." Alexia floated over the Will who had just woken a startled Elizabeth. She smiled when she saw Will and grabbed the bloody medallion from the dirt next to her.

"We have to go, now!" She whispered floating toward the other bank and crawling out quicker than a beaver.

"Soooooo… cold." Chelsea said shivering like crazy; Alexia smacked the back of her head.

"Shut it and move." Alexia snapped pushing Chelsea forward but her dress kept catching on the floor. And since Will and Elizabeth were already way ahead of them Chelsea finally bent down and ripped a good four inches on fabric off her dress.

"That was such a nice dress too." Chelsea whined as she and Alexia booked it down the cramped hallway. When they got to the boat Will was just pushing off.

"Wait!" Alexia shouted grabbing all the oars from the other boats.

"We don't want them following us." Xio explained. Chelsea looked around.

"Where be sexy Jack?" She asked still searching. Alexia, Will, and Xio shared a look.

"He decided to stay behind to give us abit more of a lead." Alexia said grabbing an oar and rowing quickly. Will and Xio shared decisive look but decided to remain quiet.

"That's not fair! I still haven't gotten to see him up close and personal!" Chelsea wailed, crying into her hands. Everyone rolled heir eyes.

* * *

Chelsea is obsessed with Jack Sparrow because he's sexy Johnny Depp. She also thinks looks overpower personality. So you can guess how well her relationships have gone i.e. bad. Read and Review.


	16. Let's Go Down To The Disco

This chapter is witty in the most perfect way. There are some mixed feelings throughout so read between the lines. It really reminds me of middle school dance and those songs they played every time. You know what I'm talking about. The cha cha slide song, the electric slide, the "I don't want to be a chicken." song and Thriller when the occasion called for it. All those songs you had to awkwardly shuffle to with the boy you liked. My teachers actually taught us how to do the dance to Thriller, no lie. Now how they knew the dance is a different story for another time.

**Don't Own Pirate. I just copy and paste this damn thing now. So not worth my time to type.**

* * *

As the gang climbed over the edge of the _Interceptor_ Elizabeth immediately started freaking out about the pirate crew.

"Not more pirates." Elizabeth's eyes widen as started to go back down the side of the ship, Will stopped her in time.

"Welcome aboard, Miss Elizabeth." Mr. Gibbs extended a hand towards Elizabeth. Elizabeth looked completely confused.

"Mr. Gibbs?" Elizabeth squinted her eyes as if to see Mr. Gibbs a little better. He nodded while Chelsea, Alexia, and Xio came stumbling over the railing laughing like a bunch of silly schoolgirls.

"Why are we laughing?" Alexia gasped wiping her eyes. Chelsea and Xio stopped giggling and looked at each other.

"I don't know…" There was a moment of silence.

"Hey where be Jack?" Mr. Gibbs asked looking over the edge to the now empty lifeboat.

"I hit him with an oar and left him for dead." Alexia flicking a piece of wood off her pants, Will laughed loudly.

"Hahahahaaa. What she means is he fell behind!" Will said laughing and smacked Alexia on the back.

"If that's what I meant to say then I would have said it so you wouldn't have to say that I said it." Alexia glared at Will but no one seemed to understand what she had just said.

"Yeah kay. KEEP TO THE CODE! Let's get this ship movin faster than Jay Jay the jet plane!" Chelsea shouted threatening people with her sword.

"MOVE IT OR LOST IT!" Xio screamed pointing her gun at the crew until the started rushing to their stations.

When Xio looked around she noticed Will and Elizabeth had gone to do their lovey dovey scene.

"You want to go watch Will and Elizabeth flirt." Xio asked Alexia who sat on her coveted barrel.

"Nah it'd be like watching a retard try and hump a doorknob." Chelsea and Xio looked at Alexia with a certain air of disgust.

"See." Alexia held her hand at the two girls. They nodded.

"So true." Chelsea sat down next to Alexia.

"What now?" She asked leaning on Alexia's shoulder. Xio snapped her head up.

"How long has it been since we did the "let's go down to the disco" dance?" She asked bunching her hair up to put in a ponytail.

"Like what? The buffalo stomp?" Chelsea asked jumping down from the barrel and stretching.

"No. Is your mind always on… the pepperoni? That other one reserved for school dances." Alexia's eyes widen as she put a hand to her head trying to remember.

"Let's do the Cha Cha Slide." She giggled bouncing up and down on her barrel while it wobbled terribly underneath her. Chelsea and Xio nodded, both were smiling.

"YEAH!" They all screamed and raced to the helm. Annamaria stood behind the wheel watching the girls in curiosity. Mr. Gibbs also watched as the girls waved their arms around trying to get the crews attention.

"EXCUSE ME!" Alexia bellowed. Everyone stopped what they were doing to look up at her. She smiled then put her hand to her head in a salute.

"Stand at attention!" Xio shouted like a general, she was surprised when all the pirates copied Alexia's stance. Chelsea turned to her nodding like a pimp or something.

"Nice." She said drawing out the word for several seconds longer than necessary.

"Now then soldiers, I have a project for you all. So listen up." Xio yelled walking down the stairs to stand in front of the now still as a statue crew, Chelsea and Alexia followed. Xio then paced up and down the floor like the drill sergeant she could be.

"My sister will be showing you some dance moves," Xio gestured towards Alexia who curtsied," And my friend Chelsea will help me sing the song you are to be dancing to." Xio gestured to Chelsea who bowed gracefully.

"We're to dance to some song by you two!" The little midget yelled, coming up from the back of the group. Xio looked down at him.

"Yeah, either that or punt kick you over the side of this ship." She put her tongue behind her front teeth in a menacing way. The midget looked her up and down before stepping back.

"Proceed." He said waving his hands in front of him.

"What you are about to learn is called the Cha Cha Slide. Chelsea sing!" Xio turned to Chelsea giving her the wrath of god look until she opened her mouth and sang the Cha Cha Slide.

"Alright people! You heard the woman slide to the left then to the right. And if you don't do it right I shoot your feet until you do!" Xio cackled like the wicked witch of the west as Alexia modeled all the moves.

* * *

Twenty minutes later Will and Elizabeth came up from below the deck to find the entire crew doing the Cha Cha Slide and Electric Slide. Chelsea was singing loudly from the railing in front of the wheel. Everyone was laughing and having a good time. Alexia and Xio were trying to teach a small group of pirates the Macarena.

"No no no! Right hand grabs inside of left arm and stay. Then left hand grabs inside of right arm and stay. Then to the neck!" Xio instructed moving arms that were out of place. Alexia stood in front of the group still dancing.

"Alexia, what is it you are doing?" Will asked as Elizabeth walked away from him, he barely noticed her departure. Alexia clapped her hands and spun around, her arms out ready to start the Macarena again.

"Oh hey Will, come here." Alexia grabbed his hands and pulled him into the group of pirates doing the Cha Cha slide, which was led by an enthusiastic Annamaria.

"No please don't, I can't dance, Alexia let go!" Will complained but Alexia just smiled.

"Just watch me." Alexia said sliding to the left then to the right. Will duplicated Alexia's exact moves.

"Alright, now reverse it." Alexia revered everything and watched as Will face was clouded with confusion.

"Okay just skip that part." Alexia said shrugging her shoulders and leaning back in a limbo style. She then pulled her self up into a standing position waving her arms above her head. When she looked back at Will his eyes were as wide as the medallion clenched in his hand. Alexia tilted her head to the side.

"Can't do that one either, huh?" She asked leaning down to cross her hands on her knees. Will shook his head, his face hot.

"Betcha can't do this one either." Alexia bent her knees and bounced up and down to Chelsea's singing beat.

"No one white can do that move without being labeled as a whore." Alexia explained when she stood up straight. Will blushed like crazy at Alexia's antics but was pulled back to earth when Elizabeth came over and dragged him away from her dancing. The look Elizabeth gave to Alexia could only be described by that cliché saying "if looks could kill I would be laying flat on the floor with Elizabeth nails embedded in my skin".

"I don't want your boyfriend 'kay sweet cheeks! He might be sexy-ish but he's a little too dirty!" Alexia yelled crossing her arms and turning away from the two quarreling lovebirds. She then located Annamaria at the head of the group, grabbed her, and hauled her to the helm.

"Look the Pearl." She whispered in Anna's ear pointing to a speck on the horizon. She gripped Anna's shoulder tightly.

"THE BLACK PEARL IS GAINING!" Xio screamed from her spot atop the crows nest.

"XIO! What in the name of the lord are you doing up there!" Alexia shouted, blocking out the sun with her hand so she could see Xio better. She stood, hands wrapped around a near by rope, grinning towards the Pearl.

"I'm making adventures!" She shouted before jumping off the mast and sliding down to the deck in an elegant manner. Alexia stepped forward clapping.

"Very nice." Alexia said in a Mexican accent, which she could pull of very nicely because she was Hispanic. Chelsea walked up to the two, hands on her hips classic mom style.

"Now that dance fever is over and the Pearl is gaining I guess we can find some food downstairs before Jackie and Barbossa show up." Chelsea ran a hand over her growling tummy. Alexia did the same while Xio tied her rope up.

"I guess, I am as hungry as wild hippo on acid. Let us devour tasty things of a food relation!" Alexia yelled as the three linked arms leaving behind a pirate crew doing the Macarena, Annamaria and Gibbs freaking out about the approaching Pearl, and Will and Elizabeth who seemed to be fighting in a corner about Alexia's dancing.

* * *

Ooo lovers spat! The Heartbreakers are at it again. Well except Xio is already taken, though she still likes to look every now and again. Read and Review.


	17. Fancy Free Boat Chase

I must admit that we gals are total and complete fatties. We will consume anything in sight. We're the ones you see at the China Buffet with those plastic boxes filled to the top and won't close. You've seen us at the movies with arm full of food and not an ounce of fat on us. Yeah. Oooo Elizabeth and Will are having a lovers spat. Jack shows up looking for something to save his skin, as usual, and Alexia freaks out around the ship sinking scene. YAY for alliteration! It's my fav of all literary terms.

**Don't Own Disney's bright idea that is… Pirates of the Caribbean.**

* * *

"Hands aloft to loose t'gallants! With this wind at her stern, she'll carry every sail we've got." Mr. Gibbs shouted waving his arms around to make the crew move like a herd of scrambling cows. Chelsea, Xio, and Alexia sat around the helm devouring salted pork, bread with butter and honey, and various types of fruits like mangoes, coconuts, and oranges.

"Who loves oranges? I love oranges. I do I do I dooo oooo!" Alexia said duplicating the famous line from Kel but since she loved orange soda too, it was okay. Xio wrinkled her nose.

"Oranges are so gross." She sneered cocking her head to the side to watch Elizabeth run up the stairs leading to the helm.

"What's going on?" She asked watching as the crew completely freaked out.

"Why don't you go and suck face with your boyfriend before I do it for you." Alexia mocked sarcastically. She looked Elizabeth in the eye before she took a bite of her over ripened orange and squirted juice all over Elizabeth's dress. Elizabeth tried to look innocent as she wiped the juice from the bottom of her dress.

"He's not my boyfriend." Elizabeth said swirled around in her dress like a silly lovesick girly girl. Chelsea and Xio gagged while Alexia spit semi-digested orange pieces all over the deck.

"It's Black Pearl, she's gaining on us." Annamaria turned around to squint at the Pearl. Elizabeth rolled her eyes.

"But this is the fastest ship in the Caribbean!" She exclaimed throwing her arms up in the air. Alexia sighed at lizzie's stupidity and stood up.

"You can tell them that after they've caught us numbnuts." Alexia flipped her hair and smiling seductively at Will who had just walked up. His face slowly changed into a rich crimson that would have impressed any Griffindor in the general area. Which amounted to zero.

"Don't worry Annamaria just try and loose them amongst those shoals." Xio pointed to still chewing on a particularly tough piece of pork. Everyone turned to stare stupidly at the shoals a small distance away.

"We don't have to outrun them long, just long enough." Mr. Gibbs said smiling

"Lighten the ship, stem to stern!" Annamaria yelled spinning the wheel eccentrically to the right.

"Don't worry we ate all the food already. Not much if you ask me." Chelsea explained licking her fingers. Xio nodded. Elizabeth looked repulsed.

"Yeah I could do better at a China Buffet than on this ranky ship." Alexia said as she picked a piece of pork from in between her teeth and flicked it over the railing. It hit Cotton in the head. Cotton stopped what he was doing and put out a hand feeling for rain.

* * *

So despite the fact that everyone else was frantically throwing barrels of gods know what into the sea Xio, Alexia, and Chelsea swung from ropes hollering like George of the Jungle.

"MUHAHAHA!" Alexia cackled kicking anyone who tried to get her down. Xio and Chelsea's ropes crossed each other's paths getting tangled and lobbed each girl to opposite ends of the deck. Xio was lucky enough to land next to Will on his cannon whereas Chelsea went careening into Elizabeth, basically tackling her to the ground.

"Oh my god!" Alexia screamed to Xio, Will nodded.

"Yes I do hope Elizabeth is okay." Will stretched his neck trying to get a better look at Elizabeth, who seemed unconscious.

"Oh, well I think she was talking about the Pearl using those oars to catch up with us but yes I do hope Elizabeth hasn't died." Xio explained as Alexia went flying by, smiling that wicked smile of hers.

"All right gents what we need now more than ever is a sneak attack!" Xio shouted pointing to the Pearl who was moving towards them with great haste.

"Mr. Gibbs and crew, load the guns with anything you can find." Mr. Gibbs nodded going below deck to load the cannons.

"Annamaria lower the anchor on," Xio turned to Will," What's the right side of a ship?"

"That would be starboard Xio." Will whispered, she rapped his fist against the bottom of his chin.

"Righte-o, on the starboard side, Annamaria. Now, let's get this show on the road!" Alexia swung by again, heading towards Annamaria, and snatched Chelsea up at the same time. They landed on the their feet beside Annamaria on the deck with a loud thud.

"How cool was that?" Alexia asked Chelsea letting her down from the rope.

"That was golden issue awesome!" She shouted then fell forward as Annamaria let go of the wheel, letting it spin uncontrollably. Alexia fell back also, her head slamming into the deck.

"OWW!!" She screeched clutching her head. Chelsea covered her ears.

"Jesus Christ Alexia, I forgot how loud you can scream. Just like a banshee." Chelsea pointed out unhelpful manner. Xio ran up.

"You okay?" Xio asked kneeling down next to Alexia, hugging her sister close as if she were dieing.

"Yeah, I think so anyways." Elizabeth, Mr. Gibbs, and Will had all come up to see what was going on. Alexia touched the back of her head tenderly and pulled it away with blood on her fingertips.

"Okay, maybe not." Alexia squealed wiping the blood on the deck, getting a splinter in the process. She sighed.

"God must be having a laugh with me today." Xio helped Alexia to her feet, Will moved forward.

"I'll help her below deck. There she'll be out of the fight and somewhat safer." Elizabeth looked too concerned to say anything about Will picking Alexia up and carrying her below deck, bridle style.

"It's okay, I mean the stars and the little chirping birds are kinda cool. Just like all the other cartoon characters that get knocked out." Alexia rambled because she heard somewhere if you couldn't hold a conversation that meant you had a concussion.

* * *

There rest of the crew stood at the ready, as the Interceptor came up on the Pearl. The pirates on each ship growled and snarled at the other pirates until someone yelled…

"FIRE!!" and the blowing up of ships began. Then the sound of gunfire and canon fire began to mingle. Chelsea and Xio, against better judgment, had been given muskets from the hold and were happily shooting at the zombie pirates.

"This is so weird." Chelsea said ducking down as a bullet went whizzing past her head. Elizabeth just reloaded and shot again. Xio nodded.

"Sure is! I'm just glad I can shoot them and they won't die. Killing people, even if they deserve it, is still wrong." Xio preached as Mr. Gibbs and Annamaria came crawling over.

"We could use a few more ideas, lasses." Mr. Gibbs pointed out as a chuck of railing blew up right above his head. Elizabeth sighed angrily.

"Your turn." Chelsea snarled lighting a near by old-fashioned bomb and throwing it over the railing. A resounding BOOM and a manly scream ensured Chelsea that she hit her target.

"What we need is a devil's dowry." Mr. Gibbs offered reloading his gun then shooting a zombie pirate who had tried to swing over to the Interceptor. Annamaria grabbed Elizabeth and held a gun to her head.

"We'll give them her!" She scowled but Xio made a loud _pssftting_ noise.

"She's not what there after. They want something a little more shiny." Xio clarified gazing toward the Interceptors mast as a canon ball severed it and sent it crashing down on the hull. Xio's eyes searched the deck for Alexia's smiling face, and when she couldn't find her she shared a look with Chelsea.

"She's still below." Xio said blankly. Chelsea looked confused.

"With Will." She turned to the hull just as Chelsea got it then followed her gaze.

"No she made it out. I mean we are talking about Alexia here." Chelsea snorted rolling her eyes but she didn't sound too convinced. Xio grabbed her arm just as Jack swung on the Interceptor. He couched down to Gibbs handed him his canteen then stood up to help Elizabeth knock a pirate overboard.

"Jack!" Chelsea squealed hugging him forcefully. Jack looked down at her.

"Where do all these teenage girls keep comin' from?" He exclaimed but Xio just narrowed her eyes.

"Shut it Jack, and no we don't have the medallion for you to buy your freedom with, wanker!" Xio scoffed pulling Chelsea off his person. Elizabeth raised her hand.

"Wretch!" She almost bitch slapped Jack but he grabbed her wrist just in the nick of time. He examined the bandage around Elizabeth's hand.

"Ahh. Where's dear William." Jack asked smoothly. Xio's eyes flashed to the grate under the mast. Elizabeth and Chelsea ran towards it at full speed while Xio stayed behind.

"Where's Alexia?" He asked nonchalantly searching the deck for Alexia to pop out and wallop him with the butt of a musket.

"She's stuck with Will. Under that grate." Xio pointed to the grate in question. Jack smiled and nodded his head.

"Serves her right!" Jack yelled. Xio smiled viciously.

"I'll tell her you said that!" Xio shouted running toward Elizabeth and Chelsea. Jack cleared his throat.

"Please don't! I'm begging you!" Jack shouted holding her hand up slightly then spotting the zombie monkey.

"Ooooo monkey!" He ran after the damned monkey.

* * *

Meanwhile, Will had laid Alexia down on a table in a small room somewhere hidden in the ship. She was still rambling on about absolutely nothing.

"And so I said "Jazz flute is for little fairy boys" and the guy piccolo player starts crying. But come on! What guy in their right mind plays piccolo for band. Am I right?" Alexia turned to face Will, waiting for him the answer. He was ripping a piece of long cloth into thin strips, but a small smile on his lips showed he had listened to her somewhat funny story.

"Yes, you sure are." He responded, cleaning Alexia's small cut. It had stopped bleeding and was scabbing over pretty nicely. Will pressing another clean square piece of clothe to protect it from infection. Alexia winced.

"Ouch." She whined moving away from Will.

"Sorry." Will apologized wrapping the long strips of cloth around her head like a turban to keep that little piece of square cloth stationary. When Will was done Alexia jumped down from the table and wobbled for a bit before Will stepped in front of her to steady her. Alexia shook her head as if trying to get water out of her ears.

"Thanks but we've got to get out of here before..." A loud crunching noise drowned her out. She cursed all the mighty gods of Greek mythology.

"THAT"S NOT FAIR!" Alexia shouted running up the stairs to come face to face with the mast of the Interceptor. Will came up behind her as she stomped her feet and punched hatch above her.

"Great now I'm going to die in my favorite movie. God forsaken piece of horse crap, OPEN THIS DOOR AT ONCE!" Alexia continued to punch the stupid door until Will pulled her away, nearly getting hit in the face.

"Alexia calm down!" Will held her tightly around the waist as she reared up and kicked the air.

"Easy for you to say. You won't die!" Then there was an explosion from a cannon hitting a nearby wall letting wood and water spray both in the face. The hull started to fill with water. Alexia screamed. Even six years of swimming lesson did not, under any circumstances, prepare you to face a sinking ship bravely.

"Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the lord my soul to keep. If I should die before I wake, I pray the lord my soul to take." Alexia kept mumbling as she fell to the floor in the classic praying kneel, her pants soaking up the water greedily. Will went over to the hull grate and started yelling.

"Hey! HEY! Below! LOOK BELOW!" Eventually Elizabeth ran over with Xio and Chelsea right behind her. Alexia leaped up and went stand next to Will.

"Xio, Chelsea! Help me. Please move the mast. Hurry before I drown!" Alexia asked frantically, her left eye twitching. All three girls tried to move the mast with no success. The water was rising faster; it was now up to Alexia's elbows.

"We can't move it. It's too heavy." Elizabeth whined trying to hold Will's hand through the grate.

"And don't worry. If Will lived in the movie, so can you!" Chelsea whispered.

"Yeah and Jack says that you're getting exactly what you deserve." Xio rolled her eyes then complained as she, Chelsea, and Elizabeth were dragged away. Alexia was left with Will and a sinking feeling in her stomach and all around her. She couldn't even think about beating up Jack for his comment, yeah it was that serious.

"Will, how will you be saving me?" Alexia asked as the water rose to her chin, shivering from the combination of chilly water and terror. Will took a quick look around the still overflowing cabin.

"I don't know. But take a deep breathe then go under." Will instructed. As the water rose past her ears Alexia took the deepest breathe of her entire life and went under. Will motioned for her to follow him and she did. What else could she do?

* * *

In all truth I have taken six years of swimming lessons. I mean come on! Being a life guard at you neighborhood pool is better than any other summer job right? Well, except working at an ice cream place. Mmmmmm ice cream. Read and Review.


	18. High Dives at Your Neighborhood Pool

You remember how Will escaped the sinking ship with no prob? Wouldn't it be wrong of me to kill him and Alexia? Yeah it would. Anyways I won't but something else happens, that you can be sure of. If you've ever seen Rocket Power on Nick then you shall know where all those dives came from. If not then you're way behind. But no worries... be happy. No worries be happy now. Now you can hum that for all of eternity. MUHAHAHA.

**DoN't OwN PiRaTeS Of ThE CaRiBbEaN! Wow that took awhile to type.**

* * *

The crew of the Interceptor now stood fastening to the Black Pearls mast with thick ropes. Elizabeth was sandwiched between Chelsea and Xio. All three were eyeing the Interceptor forlornly, waiting for any sign of Will's and Alexia safe escape.

"If any of you as much as thinks the word "parley," I'll have your guts for garters." Pintel growled pointing his gun menacingly and everyone in turn. Elizabeth managed to lift up the ropes enough for her to be free to run to the railing of the Pearl just as the Interceptor blew up.

"WILL!" She screamed, reaching out both hands to the wreckage. She turned to Barbossa, her eyes flashed before she attacked him. Chelsea and Xio were still holding their breath, hoping Alexia's presences hadn't affected Will's ability to get away from the sinking ship.

"Welcome back Miss Turner! You took advantage of our hospitality last time. It holds fair now that you return the favor!" Barbossa smiled sadistically, shoving Elizabeth towards his decrepit crew. Chelsea and Xio gasped, and not because Elizabeth was being felt up by zombies. No no, it was because Will had just leaped onto the Pearl's railing with a pale Alexia standing triumphantly next to him. Chelsea and Xio cried tears of joy at the fact that Alexia had lived.

"The operation was a success ladies and gentlemen, I'm alive!" Alexia punched the air with both arms and danced in a similar Muhammad Ali style.

"Barbossa!" Will pointed a pistol at Barbossa with the hand around Alexia. She steadied herself then jumped down to the deck. Alexia saw Chelsea and Xio and gave them a serious nod, making them crack up for some reason. Some of the crew moved forward to tie her up too, no less, when she glared at them.

"Unless you want to be tortured for the rest of eternity I suggest you back the HELL UP!" She snarled baring her teeth at the crew until they hurriedly backed away. After almost dieing, Alexia was not in the mood for someone else threatening her life. She searched the deck for Jack and when she saw him she and dragged a finger across her neck in the classic "you are so dead" way. Jack wrapped a hand around his neck and swallowed loudly, Alexia smiled wickedly.

"She goes free Barbossa!" Will shouted shaking his pistol at Barbossa. Besides the fact that the gunpowder was probably wet and unusable Barbossa also laughed at Will because he couldn't die.

"You only have one shot, and we can't die." Barbossa pointed out laughing again.

"Don't do anything stupid." Jack begged but stopped when Alexia stalked over to him.

"Deserved what I got, huh?" She asked angrily raising her fist to hit Jack but stopped. She smiled pleasantly at the way he had flinched.

"I'm invincible sucka!" Alexia clapped her hands then threw her arms out like "oh… what? Whatcha going to do about that!"

"Yeah well I can! Sucka!" Will shouted pointing the gun at himself. Alexia, Chelsea, and Xio stared at Will.

"I know that white boy did not just say that?" Xio asked Chelsea, she nodded.

"Dude that's messed up. Big time." Chelsea replied pulling up the ropes so she and Xio could stand next to Alexia. The crew started towards them but stopped when the three girls defiantly stared at them. Barbossa huffed.

"Would ya'll stop talking. I'm trying to see why this boy is willing to kill himself." He said generally annoyed. Alexia crossed her arms.

"Did you just say "ya'll" like a mudding lovin' hillbilly?" Alexia asked in faux disbelief. Chelsea frowned.

"Hey, mudding ain't that bad." Chelsea defended the retard sport. Xio snorted.

"Yeah not as bad as your grammar. Ain't is not a word." Xio eyes widen in an unspoken "DUH! Chelsea gave her a pissed off look.

"It's in the dictionary. If you we're so busy sucking face with Brandon you would have known that." Chelsea yelled angrily. Alexia "ohed" for her life, the crew unthinkingly followed.

"She's got god on her side Xio. She got god." Alexia elongated the last word and looked very self righteous. Barbossa huffed again like an impatient soccer mom and motioned for Will to continue.

"Who are you boy-o" Barbossa asked stepping forward a little. Jack stepped up.

"No one. He's no one. Just a, you know, distant cousin of my aunt's nephew twice removed. Lovely singing voice, though," Jack glance at Will over his shoulder before turning back to Barbossa and whispering," Eunuch."

"That's how he became the tenor in our coral group. We're to sing in Port Royal for the wedding of Miss Turner to the Commodore." Chelsea piped up. Alexia looked impressed by her quick thinking.

"No my name is William Turner!" Will shouted, Jack back away from Barbossa, hands raised, and walked over to the girls.

"Are you going to hit me?" He asked Alexia. She shrugged.

"Nah, you're okay now. Knuckle touch." She held up her fist waiting her Jack to give her some skin. When Jack took to long to comprehend the simple gesture of friendship she moved to Chelsea who pounded her fist against Alexia's.

"You _es stupido_." Xio point out slowly to Jack the tapped her temple twice.

"Name your terms Mr. Turner." Barbossa spoke in a bored tone.

"Elizabeth goes free!" Will repeated stupidly. All three girls cleared their throats.

"Oh… and those two." Will gestured to Alexia and Chelsea, who proceeded to start dancing like the just won a million dollars each. Xio narrowed her eyes then, quick as a flash, threw a dagger at Will's head. It missed him by centimeters.

"And her too!" Will pointed at Xio in a defeated manner, Xio joined in on the dancing while Jack pointed at himself.

"And the crew… the crew are not to be harmed." Will thought for a moment before nodding, satisfied with his demands. Chelsea rolled her eyes and muttered "idiot" quietly. Alexia smirked.

"Sure is." Alexia smacked her thigh and nodded like a hillbilly.

"Agreed." Barbossa sneered then laughed in a manner that suggested he had just remembered a really fun joke that he didn't think anybody would get and didn't bother repeating aloud.

* * *

"Go ahead poppet. Walk the plank." Pintel taunted Elizabeth as she took the smallest footsteps known to man so she wouldn't have to jump into the ocean. Alexia, Xio, and Chelsea stood watching her. They would be next. Will was brought forward, tied and bounded, by two ugly looking pirates.

"Barbossa you lying…" Will shouted but was interrupted by Alexia.

"Shut your mouth." She gasped covering her mouth with her hand.

"But I was talking about Shack?" Xio chimed in and the three girls started moon walking on deck.

"You swore Alexia would go free!" Will continued. Elizabeth's head snapped up, while Alexia just turned to raise her eyebrows at Will.

"I mean Elizabeth. You swore she'd go free!" Will went shifty eyed as Elizabeth slowly crossed her arms, her eye boring holes through Wills. Alexia stood bemused, why had Will said her name?

"It seems you are confused on two things Mr. Turner!" Barbossa laughed then suddenly stopped.

"Don't you dare impugn me honor boy. I agreed all the woman would go free, but it was you who failed to specify when or where." The pirates holding Will finally managed to gag him.

"True that son." Alexia piped up, Jack slapped a hand over her mouth to quiet her. Alexia gave him a look saying "I will bite you" so he let go.

"Though it does seem a shame to lose something so fine don't it lads?" Barbossa smiled when the crowd wolf whistled and stomped their feet in a barbaric way. Elizabeth glared at the crew from her high platform.

"So I'll be needing that dress back." Barbossa sneered. Elizabeth's eyes widen.

"FINE!" Elizabeth started to unbutton her dress.

"Wooo!! Take it off!" Chelsea shouted while Xio hummed the strip tease song.

"Chelsea you are so bizarre." Alexia raised an eyebrow but Chelsea just shrugged.

"I'm bi so it's all cool." Chelsea pouted and nodded her head like a crack whore.

"What's bi?" Pintel asked, Ragetti close behind him.

"Bi stands for bisexual, which would be when a person likes the opposite and same sex at the same time." Chelsea explained.

"Here, it goes with your black heart." Elizabeth threw the dress at Barbossa.

"Do you like me now Will? Huh? _HUH_?" Elizabeth asked throwing her arms up. Will stared at Elizabeth and her see through nightgown until she tripped and fell backwards into the water below.

"Now you ladies." Barbossa gestured to the plank but the girls stood still.

"Is it cold?" Chelsea asked hesitantly. Xio gave her a look.

"Who cares? It's just like a jump on the high drive at your neighborhood pool." She pointed out. Alexia moved towards Will and pulled the DVD remote from her pocket.

"I need you to keep this dry tis very important, okay?" Alexia asked slowly. When Will nodded Alexia slipped the remote into his shirt.

"Alrighty then." Alexia turned on a heel then ran full force to the plank. When she got to the end she jumped.

"CAN OPENER!" She yelled in mid air reaching her arms out and cutting though the water, head first. Chelsea smiled then ran to the plank.

"PENCIL!" Chelsea jumped off the edge and snapped her arm to her side and her legs closed. Xio then jumped forward and laughed.

"JACK KNIFE!" Xio grabbed her leg behind her back and splashed into the water. She swam to the surface to join Chelsea and Alexia who were floating on their backs, waiting to see if Barbossa would hold up to Jack's negotiations.

"Wonder if Barbossa gave him enough bullets to shoot us all." Chelsea asked as Barbossa threw Jack's effects overboard and right infront of the girls. Moments later Jack came diving down to recover it on the oceans bottom.

"Doubt it." Alexia backstroked her way to the beach, with Chelsea and Xio close behind. They all watching the sky as they swam.

"I can't believe Will called your name Alexia." Chelsea pried but Alexia wasn't having any of that and remained silent.

"Yeah and he is good looking." Xio chimed in.

"Yeah and his perfect mate is Elizabeth and will always be Elizabeth." Alexia sighed. There was an uncomfortable silence.

Alexia looked over at here friend and sister. Then she sang, "Here is a little song I wrote. You might want to sing it note for note."

"Don't worry, be happy." Xio and Chelsea chimed in.

"In every live we have some trouble, but if you worry you make it double." Alexia saw Jack break the surface and come swimming towards their group.

"Don't worry, be happy." They sang letting the waves carry them to shore to await their fate.

* * *

I like that song. So relaxing and mellow. It's a nice kicking back song. You have my heart Bobby McFerrin. Read and Review while you're humming or whistling, whichever one you like best.


	19. Mine or Yours It Doesn't Matter!

The meal I have prepared for your brain will be exceptional and incomparable. We will start out with an elegant catfight as an appetizer. Then as a main course some pyrotechnics with a side of "but why is the rum gone?" Then to finish it up a light and tangy punch to the ego with slight irony. Mmm sounds good. Now if you don't mind I'm going to go eat some food for my stomach so... rather see ya then be ya! Wow that was preppy.

**DoN't OwN PiRaTeS! But I'm still cooler than your face.**

* * *

The girls trudged up to the shore, their soaked clothing making it difficult to walk. As they came up the beach an angry Elizabeth headed them off.

"What do you think you're doing?" Elizabeth hissed. Xio wiped her plastered bangs from her forehead.

"I think we're getting out of the water, because we enjoy swimming without clothes on." Xio said sarcastically. Chelsea and Alexia ignored Elizabeth's hissy fit and began to strip off their pirate garb. They laid the clothes on near by tree branches to dry. Luckily the girls had worn their shorts and bathing suits underneath it all.

"Not you! HER!" Elizabeth shrieked pointing a shaking finger at Alexia. Alexia looked around, and when she saw no one behind her, she pointed at herself.

"Who me?" Alexia asked, when Elizabeth nodded she sighed," What's wrong now Lizzie girl?"

"Why are you trying to steal Will from me!" Elizabeth was getting all up in Alexia's grill. She raised an eyebrow at Elizabeth accusations.

"First of all, Will is not property you can pay for and then own. So he's not yours or anybodies, for that matter." Alexia pointed out.

"Ouch, third degree BURN!" Chelsea shouted shaking her hand like she had just burned it. Xio nodded.

"Second of all. I am not trying to steal Will from you. He's obviously gotten bored with your prissy little attitude." Elizabeth mouth fell open at this point.

"And finally we come to this. I can't control Will's mind slip up's or his urges. So cry me a river, build a bridge, and get the fuck over it, 'mkay princess?" Alexia put her hands on her hips and waited for Elizabeth rebuttal.

"Yeah well. You better leave him alone because he's mine!" Elizabeth advanced on Alexia and shoved her shoulder. Alexia looked at Xio, then Chelsea before turning back to Elizabeth.

"Newbie don't shove me." Alexia's eyes narrowed into silts.

"Really why shouldn't I?" Elizabeth asked shoving her shoulder again.

"Because whenever someone shoves me like that more than twice this white hot rage flashes across my sight and I have no control over my actions." Alexia said calmly. Chelsea shared a look with Xio, who shrugged her shoulders.

"Let us see what happens." Xio said nodding, Chelsea looked uneasy.

"If you say so." She twiddled her thumbs.

"Oh, what like this?" Elizabeth shoved Alexia's shoulder yet again and smiled smugly.

Alexia tilted her head to the side before pulling back her fist a punching Elizabeth in the side of her face. Elizabeth screamed when Alexia's knuckles made contact with her left cheek. Chelsea and Xio moved forward but weren't fast enough to stop the first hit, but it didn't look like Alexia was planning another attack. She had crossed her arms and was looking down at Elizabeth with pity before offering her hand. Elizabeth cringed away from her gesture.

"Come on now lizzie girl. I gave you a fair warning. Up and adam." Elizabeth took Alexia's hand uncertainly and let her pull her to her feet. Alexia patted her back. Jack came walking up from a spot on the beach he had been watching his Pearl sail away.

"What's happened here?" He asked catching sight of Elizabeth's bruising cheek.

"Nothing. Lizzie here just needed alittle come to Jesus is all." Alexia explained.

"You assaulted Ms. Swann?" Jack asked simply. Xio was checking Elizabeth for any other wounds from her quick and unevenly matched tussle. Other than a large bruise forming on her cheek she was more or less fine, a little shaken up but fine all the same. Chelsea slung an arm around Elizabeth's shoulders.

"We had a disagreement. And when Lizzie shoved me I gave her a solid warning before punching her in the face." Alexia crossed her arms and glared at Jack when she noticed he was staring at her chest as she spoke.

"Like the view?" She asked raising an eyebrow high. Jack looked up from her bathing suit. He cleared his throat loudly before looking over at Elizabeth who was holding her cheek in her hand, whining.

"Hey Jack! How about some rum? Bet Ms. Liz could use something to dull the pain. Alexia popped her good." Chelsea pulled Elizabeth forward, Xio following close behind trying to hide her smile.

"Yes, right this way." Jack walked forward a several paces before putting an ear to a tree. After knocking twice he rooted himself to the trunk then took four large shaky steps forward. He then jumped up and down a few times.

"Please get me off this island Jack." Elizabeth moaned. Her cheek was now throbbing.

"And to what point and purpose, young missy? The Black Pearl is gone and your, or shall I say Alexia's," Jack looked to Alexia, who could have cared less," Will will be dead long before any of us could reach him."

"But you're Captain Jack Sparrow." Elizabeth said angrily, "You vanished from under the eyes of seven agents of the East India Company. You sacked Nassau Port without even firing a single shot. Are you the pirate I've read about or not? How did you escape last time?"

"Careful now luv, you're working the same tone that got you slapped in the first place." Xio said in a southern drawl. Elizabeth eyed Alexia; she was whispering something to Chelsea and laughing.

"Last time…" Jack began but Chelsea blurted out.

"He was only here for three days. Stupid liar drank rum the entire time and managed to barter a passage off the island with the rumrunners that owned it. Isn't that right Jack?" Chelsea smiled evilly, Jack rolled his eyes.

"Yes, I suppose you are." Jack bent down and opened the secret cellar door hidden under the sand. He stepped in, clinked a few bottles together, and came back out with an arm full of rum bottles.

"So that's it then? That's the secret grand adventure of the infamous Jack Sparrow? You spent three days lying on a beach, drinking rum!" Elizabeth said trying to step in front of Jack as he passed two rum bottles, and a bottle filled with water to the girls.

"I'm not too sure I want to give you girls boozes so here's some water too. It goes down rough but it goes down. And the second swig goes down easier." Jack explained but Chelsea just grabbed the bottles.

"Yeah, yeah grandpa. Who wants shooters?" Chelsea lifted the bottles above her head laughing like a loon. Jack turned back to Elizabeth.

"Welcome to the Caribbean luv." Jack smiled widely and followed the young girls to the beach. They had already started singing "Brick House" by Commodores. Ironic, no?

* * *

While Elizabeth and Jack danced around the bonfire and sang their song the girls were stationed in front of the flames belting as much as Elizabeth's pirate song they could remember.

"Yo ho, yo ho, a pirates life for me!" After several of hours the girls even had choreographed moves to go along with the song like a screwed up Broadway performance. They went on saluting and cutting their blades through the air so quickly they made cool whooshing noises.

"We pillage, we plunder, we rifle, we loot. Drink up me hearties yo, ho!" Elizabeth and Chelsea square dance while Alexia and Xio joined hands and spun faster and faster.

"We kidnap and ravage and we don't give a hoot! Drink up me hearties yo ho!" Elizabeth tripped and got a face full of dirt. Chelsea laughed and moved to try and break Alexia and Xio's hands apart. Since they were a whirlwind of Hispanic's when Chelsea charge towards them they went flying in opposite directions. Xio took Chelsea down while Alexia went crash landing into Jack, who had been drinking from his bottle.

"I love this song!" Jack yelled slapping an arm around Alexia's waist as she laughed at Elizabeth. She had her feet spread apart wide so she wouldn't fall again.

"Cheers to the pirates life!" Alexia toasted and Xio and Chelsea wobbled over to clink their bottles against hers.

"Yo ho, yo ho a pirates life for me!" Chelsea spun in circles before landing on the ground with a thump, taking Xio down with her. Alexia leaned into Jack laughing harder than ever and pointing at Xio as she tried to pick Chelsea back up. Elizabeth crawled over to Chelsea and slapped her face gently. She looked up at Xio.

"Might want to leave her here for now." Elizabeth advised curling up next to her. Xio shrugged and lay down next to Chelsea yawning. Alexia smiled and shook her head as she sipped once more from her bottle. Jack leaned down to place his chin on her shoulder. Alexia flinched at his closeness and pushed him away.

"Creepy Jack." She said coyly still smiling. She yawning widely and sat Indian style to face the waves breaking on the beach and the moon hanging heavily in the cloudless night sky. Jack measured the amount of rum in her bottle before stumbling into the seat next to her.

"Beautiful ain't it luv?" Jack asked looking out at the sea. Alexia nodded tiredly resisting the urge to rest her head on Jack shoulder.

"Sure is. It's to bad Barbossa's taken your ship again. I would have loved to sail with you." Alexia yawned again stretching out in her bathing suit. Jack watched her out of the side of his vision.

"What is that you're wearin' luv? It's very odd to see a girl of your age wearin' such a thing." Jack inquired, Alexia laughed again.

"Nothing." She said laying back, sleep making her eye lips extremely heavy.

"Yes, I can see that." Jack was knocking back his last bottle of rum when Alexia propped herself up on her elbows and gave him a fierce glare.

"Your behavior is atrocious." She mumbled under her breath. Jack gave her a somewhat charming gold toothed smile.

"Well, I am Captain Jack Sparrow." Jack said as if this explained his behavior and curled his mustache into a type of French look. Alexia raised her eyebrows and snickered.

"Yeah well, keep it to yourself Captain. I'm trying to sleep here." Alexia shook her head as Jack put an arm around her waist and snuggled up close. She smiled and managed to nod off before Chelsea's drunken snoring kicked it up a notch.

* * *

The girls stir around early morning, of rumbling stomachs and heavy heads. They looked up and were relieved to find Elizabeth still asleep next to Chelsea. This meant they could eat breakfast before Elizabeth went on her rampage and burned all their supplies. Twenty minutes later the girls were munching on toast and jam around their bonfire when Elizabeth came about.

"What are you doing up so early?" She asked passing the girls and unloading rums boxes from the cellar. Alexia snorted.

"Since when do you talk to me?" She asked with extra malice on the side, violently taking a bite out of her toast. Chelsea sighed.

"Come on, not this early in the morn Alexia and would you pass the strawberry jam?" Chelsea gestured to the jam jar of choice. Elizabeth continued piling up boxes.

"Yes, it is because I need your help." Elizabeth turned to the girls who seemed to be listening, or pretending to be.

"I need to burn this so…" But Elizabeth never finished.

"So you can get the Commodores attention, get your way, and go save Will?" Xio asked sarcastically. Elizabeth nodded.

"Yes." Elizabeth said simply. The girls shared a look then slowly rose to a stand.

"Alright, we'll help you." Xio said rubbing her hands together.

"Plus who doesn't absolutely love a good burning of random objects." Chelsea agreed. Alexia rolled her eyes.

"Fine. I guess if I can find a way to burn a gigantic stuffed dog from the inside out then I can burn this stuff." Alexia grabbed a run bottle and a half burned stick from the fire. She motioned for the others to take a stick too. When they had she raised hers high.

"Pyromaniacs Unit!" Alexia shouted. The rest cheered along with her.

* * *

In less than ten minutes everything in sight that could be burned was burning. Xio and Chelsea ran around the island lighting fire to trees in the shape of a smiley face, while Elizabeth and Alexia figure out the most efficient why to blow up the rum and other alcohol.

"So you really are not trying to steal Will away from me?" Elizabeth asked after she and Alexia had arranged the last of the kegs. Alexia dust her self off, the keggers were very dusty.

"Nope." She said simply gave Elizabeth a sincere look. Elizabeth hung her heavy head.

"Then I am sorry for being so rude and juvenile about the situation. You were right after all. Will is not property and therefore not own able." Elizabeth reasoned more to herself than Alexia.

"Apology accepted Lizzie." Alexia saluted her before she turned on a heel and headed for the beach to tan.

* * *

Once the last of the boxes and kegs were stacked and had been lighted they burned bright. Elizabeth watched as the smoke slowly wafted up in the air. Alexia lay down next Jack soaking up the sun. After a few minutes or so she grew bored and propped her self up on her elbow. Jack, who was still in a deep sleep on the beach, barely registered when she began waving a small palm leaf over his nose. After awhile he awoke to the smell and sight of smoke. He sat straight up.

"What's going on?" He asked looking around. A few feet away Xio and Chelsea were splashing each other in the shadows. He noticed Alexia trying to balance the small palm leave on her own nose.

"Elizabeth's burned every thing. The rum is gone." Alexia sat back and lounged as Jack went stomping up the beach.

"NOT GOOD! Stop! Elizabeth how can you do this! You burned all the food and my shade! And the rum!" Jack shouted waving his hands above his head like a peacock ready to attack.

"Yes." Elizabeth turned to Jack, smiling that smudge smile of hers again. "The rum is gone."

"WHY IS THE RUM?!" Chelsea yelled from down the beach. Jack held his hand out to Chelsea like "see, they care about rum too!"

"Because it is a vile drink that turns even the most respectable men into complete scoundrels!" Elizabeth snarled. Xio and Chelsea made their way back to where Alexia was watching Elizabeth and Jack with a certain amusement.

"Two, Jack you've probably had enough alcohol to kill a pony." Alexia said smirking slightly. Jack gave Alexia a wrath of god type look that would have had her cowering in fear if she hadn't been slightly toasted from a bottle of rum she managed to sneak from Elizabeth.

"And three, that signal is over a thousand feet high!" Xio chimed in. "I know cause I helped make it."

Jack turned on her.

"You helped her burn the RUM!" He yelled throwing up his arms in agony. Xio thought for a moment.

"Yep. And Alexia helped too. Oh! And Chelsea." The girls waved at Jack's gaping face. He closed his eyes and rubbed his temples.

"I can't deal with this." He said stalking off, away from the fray. Alexia put a hand on her hip.

"Okay Jackie. But don't come crying to us when you see white sails on that horizon!" She shouted when Jack had gotten half down the beach. He had to stop, however, when he arrived at the edge of his small rumrunner island. Bobbing gently directly infront of him was the Dauntless.

"TOLD YOU!" Elizabeth shouted proudly as the girl raced towards Jack's spot on the beach. Alexia smiled as they rounded the corner. Jack was now gaping at the Dauntless.

"There'll be no living with her after this, Jack." She said patting his shoulder in a mocking fashion. Chelsea kneeled over and looked back up.

"Four fifty-two. Four fifty-two. Hunt, hunt, HIKE!" Chelsea called racing forward and tackling Jack to the ground.

"Talk about a double donkey punch to the ego." Alexia commented as Xio moved forward.

"DOGGPILE!" Xio shouted body slamming Chelsea and Jack. Alexia then joined in and beckoned Elizabeth to sit on her. Jack watched helplessly as a small longboat carrying Elizabeth's soon to be fiancée rowed its way to the island.

* * *

First of all I absolutely love Megan Mooney from comedy central presents. She is so funny in all the right ways. So if your listening Megan know this, double donkey punch is now apart of my everyday vocabulary. I love the Irish! (especially Colin Ferrell) Read and Review.


	20. The Proposal about the proposal

Sorry it's taken so long. You would not believe the schoolwork I have piled up. Anyhoo I still find time to entertain so here it is. Chapter 20. I hope you enjoy and pray that my teachers stop giving me homework assignments, tests to study for, and projects that take five hours to research. Ain't life a bitch sometimes?

**Don't own Johnny Depp or the whole Pirates gang. To bad, so sad.**

* * *

"But we have to go save Will!" Elizabeth whined hounding a grateful yet irritated Commodore Norrington. Alexia, Xio, and Chelsea were trying to keep the soldiers, who were supposed to be arresting Jack, at bay.

"We will not let you take Jack!" Chelsea announced, Xio and Alexia stood by her side their swords and pistols at the ready. Together they were invincible. This was Murtogg and Mullroy's time to step in. Only Alexia relaxed her stance and sheathed her weapons.

"Hey Murtogg, Mullroy, what is up my brothers?" Alexia slapped both the men's hands in turn. Mullroy moved forward.

"We have to do our job and lock him in irons Alexia. I am terribly sorry." Mullroy grabbed Jack's arm roughly and pulled him toward the Commodore to await orders. Alexia nodded.

"Do what you must. But my girls here are to be over looked. Agreed?" Alexia tilted her head to the side. Mullroy looked to Murtogg for an answer.

"Agreed." Murtogg said in a bored voice. Chelsea elbowed Xio in the ribs.

"Talk about a Debbie Downer. Just looking at him makes me want to slit my wrists." Chelsea whispered making Xio laugh. Murtogg gave them both a dirty look.

"Don't push your luck." Murtogg smirked. Xio shared a look with Chelsea, crossed her arms, and leaning back in her number one "bring it" pose.

"Like I'm afraid of you chubs. Bitch please." She mocked with an overly dramatic expression and her hand raised slightly in the air. Alexia cleared her throat loudly.

"Shut it Xio. Be glad you won't be brig like someone else I know." Alexia smiled with her hands behind her back, as she rolled her eyes to Jack.

"This is so not fair." Jack whined like a five year old wanting candy.

"You know you whine like a five year old an awful lot." Xio pointed out shrugging her shoulders. Chelsea nodded.

"I have noticed that." She thought for a moment.

"Then we condemn him to dead!" Elizabeth whined her voice hitting an octave only dogs could hear. The girls covered their ears, cringing.

"The bells! I can't stand the bells!" Alexia screamed sinking to her knees, reaching for the sky. Chelsea dug a finger in her ear.

"Chelsea that is so not feminine." Xio said disgusted but Chelsea just stared at her with wide eyes.

"I CAN"T HEAR YOU! MUSICS TOO LOUD!" Chelsea shouted elongating all her words. Xio wrapped an arm around Chelsea's shoulders, trying to comfort her.

"The boy's fate is regrettable, but, then, so was his decision to engage in piracy." Governor Swann stumbled over his words. Alexia made a loud long "Phsssttttttt" noise.

"Oh please, being a pirate is the sexist thing you could ever do." Alexia spoke up but then rethought her statement.

"Well, that and being a Calvin Klein model but that comes with the whole "is he gay" question. Which happens more often then you think." She nodded to all the confused faces. Jack shook his head and jumped at the opportunity to speak.

"If I may be so bold as to inject my professional opinion. The Pearl was listing near to scuppers after the battle." Jack leaned into the Norrington personal bubble and continued.

"It's very unlikely she'll be able to make good time. Think about it." He looked the Norrington up and down in a way that disturbed him greatly. Alexia circled a finger around her temple and then pointed to Jack while mouthing "crazy".

"The Black Pearl. The last real pirate threat in the Caribbean, mate. How can you pass it up?" Jack whispered astonished that Norrington had not thought, even for a second, to go after the Pearl.

"By remembering that I serve others, Mr. Sparrow, not only myself." Norrington replied pompously. Chelsea and Xio puffed out their chests and started saluting each other behind the Commodore back. Alexia sidled up to Jack.

"Ooo can I call you Mr. Sparrow? It's very sexy." Alexia smiled, tracing a finger along Jack's chest. Jack seemed to be at a lost for words. Alexia grew bored of her game with Jack and turned back to Norrington.

"Yeah, anyways Commodore Norrington, right?" Alexia gestured to Norrington.

"Um, yes we've met before Miss Alexia." Norrington said confused as to why Alexia was acting this way. Chelsea smirked.

"She knows your name. She's just trying to be condescending." Chelsea rolled her eyes. People of this century were so overrated.

"Commodore Norrington, is it?" Alexia asked again, this time Norrington nodded.

"Yes what is it?" He sighed fiddling with his the buckles on his shirt.

"I have a proposition for you. I offer you Elizabeth's hand in marriage for the safe return of my dear friend, William Turner." Everyone looked up at Alexia who never took her eyes of Norrington's face. Elizabeth was enraged.

"You can't do that!" She objected. Her father, after getting over the shock nodded his head meaningfully.

"The hell I can!" Alexia roared pointing a finger dangerously in Elizabeth's face. She backed away to corner with her father clinging to her arm. Alexia recomposed herself before turning back to Norrington and smiling sweetly.

"Anyhoo, before I was so RUDELY INTERUPTED!" Alexia narrowed her eyes at Elizabeth and her father before continuing, "If you comply with these negations then you get Elizabeth's hand in marriage, plain and simple. So do we have an accord?"

Norrington thought for a moment about having Elizabeth as his wife while Elizabeth gripped Alexia's forearm tightly.

"What are you doing?" She hissed but Alexia just "shhhed" her.

"Um, rescuing Will, Duh! Just say you'll marry James now and break it off later." Alexia murmured. Norrington looked close to a decision. Chelsea leaned towards the quiet discussion.

"Just do it Elizabeth and stop being a baby. What's a little commitment?" She smiled evilly Elizabeth squirmed under the pressure. Xio joined in.

"I mean if you don't want to save Will then that's fine. I'm sure Alexia will be glad to do it for you." Xio grinned. Elizabeth nodded in a final sort of way.

"I accept your proposal Alexia." Norrington said very excitingly.

"And I agree to the Commodores proposal!" Elizabeth smiled and then winked at Alexia.

"You know you're an awkward winker." Alexia gave Elizabeth a weird look before bumping her hip against Jack's.

"I do love a good wedding. Don't you?" Jack shared her smile.

"A wedding! I love weddings! Drinks all around." Jack raised his arms and began to dance merrily with Alexia. The Commodores steady glare made him stop cold and extended his arms.

"I know. "Clap him in irons" right?" Jack sighed, Norrington grinned like a homeless man who had just been given a juicy Christmas ham.

"Mr. Sparrow, you will accompany these fine men to the helm and provide us with the bearings to Isla de Muerta. You will then spend the rest of the voyage contemplating all possible meanings of the phrase "silent as the grave." Do I make myself clear?" Norrington asked looking daggers at Jack.

"Inescapably clear." Jack said miserably as the soldiers lead him below deck. Chelsea turned to face Norrington.

"Do you allow visiting hours with your prisoners?" She asked politely, Norrington looked horror-struck.

"No, you and your friends will stay above deck with Elizabeth like proper young ladies." Norrington said shaking his head and taking post at the wheel. Chelsea shared a look with Alexia and Xio before reaching out for Elizabeth's arm.

"So Elizabeth what do you do on a ship for fun?" Chelsea asked grinning like a madman, Xio and Alexia were laughing behind her. Elizabeth raised an eyebrow at her fellow friends.

* * *

Half an hour later the Dauntless was close to approaching the Isla de Muerta, or from what Alexia could tell from the map Jack had drawn for her. Elizabeth, trying to make amends with Alexia, had brought food and drink to the girls. Currently they were holed up in the Captain's Quarters playing BS, as they came up with a plan.

"When do we move the longboat and how do we move it without being seen?" Alexia asked her small group sitting around the map Jack had given her. Cards littered the map in no particular manner. Xio shrugged offering up no chips to the table. Chelsea threw forward three cards.

"Three fours. And I have no idea." She looked over her cards before facing Alexia. Elizabeth tossed two cards on the growing pile.

"Two fives. And we have to move the longboat after we dock or it will float away." Elizabeth rearranged her cards for a better view, Alexia nodded.

"BS, and four sixes. Yes but how do we get it down without Norrington noticing?" Alexia asked again as Elizabeth took the entire stack of cards, grumbling. Xio placed three cards down.

"Three sevens. We just need a distraction. Which will be Elizabeth." Xio nodded to Chelsea telling her that it was her turn. Chelsea put down her cards.

"One eight. But how?" Chelsea asked looking up from the game. Alexia smiled.

"She doesn't have to do much." They all laughed and then continued to play BS until a ruckus on deck drew them from their places.

* * *

The Commodore was gathering a shore party to go to the caves. They had finally docked at the dreaded Isla de Muerta, which didn't look too bad. An eerie fog and some collapsed ships was all. Alexia stepped towards the Commodore.

"One of us will be coming with you, Norrington." Norrington opened his mouth to speak but Alexia held up her hand.

"This is not open to discussion James." She commanded, her voice calm, cool, and collected. Norrington thought of his options, which came to none. Jack stood in awe of Alexia's manner of speaking. Even Xio and Chelsea were impressed.

"I see. Well, Miss Alexia who will be joining us?" Norrington asked hoping it would not be her. Alexia grinned evilly.

"I shall go my dear Commodore. I have unfinished business with Barbossa."

* * *

In the longboat with the rest of the soldiers and Jack, Alexia sat quietly as they rowed closer to the mouth of the Isla de Muerta cave. Norrington shifted in his chair so he could face Jack in the tiny boat.

"I don't care for the situation. Any attempt to storm the caves could turn to an ambush." Norrington noted.

"Not if you're the one doing the ambushing." Jack blabbered on while Alexia looked back to the boat. Xio and Chelsea had lowered a longboat into the water and were rowing towards the back of the Dauntless to pick up Elizabeth. Alexia smiled to herself and turned back to the discussion between the two men. Jack put his arm on Norrington's shoulders in a "buddy buddy" type way.

"What do you have to lose?" Jack smiled his gold toothed smile. Norrington looked at Jack's arm with such an air of disgust Alexia could literally feel it. He then peeled off the arm quickly.

"Nothing I'd lament being rid of." Norrington agreed.

"Now, to be quite honest with you, there's still a slight risk for those aboard the Dauntless which includes the future Mrs. Commodore." Jack said sneakily. Norrington nodded to Gillette who rowed his boat back to the Dauntless quickly.

* * *

"Sorry madam but it is for your own safety." Gillette repeated robotically. He and another soldier were escorting Elizabeth to the Captains Quarters, where she knew Xio and Chelsea sat silently floating delicately on the waters surface below the back windows. Elizabeth still struggled to keep face.

"Coward! I have to tell him! The pirates are cursed and cannot be killed!" She shouted but Gillette just laughed at her.

"Don't worry miss. He's already informed of that. A little mermaid flopped up on deck and told him the whole story." Gillette continued to laugh as he slammed the glass doors closed.

"This is Jack Sparrow's doing!" Elizabeth yelled as Gillette turned the corner. After a few minutes Elizabeth pressed herself against the frosted glass door to check if the coast was clear. When Gillette turned to converse with a guard beside him Elizabeth scrambled to the near by bed. Hidden underneath was a rope ladder Xio had found in the hull. Elizabeth then ran to the window and threw them open.

"Rapunzel, Rapunzel. Let down your long hair!" Xio proclaimed standing up in the longboat and reaching out one hand Elizabeth while the other was placed firmly on the heart. It was a loving gesture that Elizabeth laughed at.

"Shut up and grab the ladder. I am not falling all the way down!" And with that Elizabeth jumped over the windowsill and down the ladder faster than lighting. Chelsea and Xio worked hard to keep the boat from tipping. When Elizabeth finally settled in Xio handed her a paddle.

"Time to go save prince charming." Xio smirked.

* * *

Read and Review and you may have rum. Got a little Captain in you?


	21. Is This Cause you Fancy Me?

Oooo... there's a part in this chapter that came to me after I wrote most of it. I was literally putting it into the story when an idea popped into my head. Very _riskay_ if you know what I mean. Oh you guys are going to love me for this chapter. It will so make up for how long it took to write! If you're tempted then read. Read like the WIND!

**Uh the usual don't own pirates yadah yadah blah blah. Okay.**

* * *

Alexia and Jack sat across from each other on the longboat not speaking. Alexia had her arms wrapped tightly around her legs in an effort to keep warm. The island seemed to give off a colder atmosphere then the rest of the Caribbean.

"Are you cold luv?" Jack asked leaning forward and slipping off his jacket. Alexia shook her head.

"Not if it involves some stupid sexual innuendo." Alexia backed away only slightly since there was about one more inch of bench left before she fell over the edge. Jack shook his head laughing.

"Here." He held out his jacket. Alexia eyed him carefully before snatching the jacket out of his hand. Jack gave her a look for her speed.

"It won't harm you." Jack rubbed her shoulder while she shrugged into his jacket.

"No touch kay? Just cause you gave me your letterman jacket does not mean you own me. What do I look like a cheerleader?" Alexia snipped. Jack slowly took back his hand and stared rowing again. They came upon the waterfall again this time Alexia did not grab at Jack for balance.

"So, what's your plan?" Alexia asked snuggling into her new jacket; it smelled of rum and wood varnish. An odd combination that some how worked. Jack laughed again, more to himself this time.

"I'm going to, as you would say, wing it." Jack voice echoed in the small cave. Alexia shivered even in Jack's jacket. The eerie skeletons were starting to seriously creep her the hell out.

"I know you have a plan Jack." Alexia pointed out, running her fingers over the waters surface. The water was cool and she had the strongest urge to swim. Suddenly there a loud clanking noise and crazy laughter echoed in the small cave. Alexia looked around anxiously.

"And it better be a good one."

"We'll be fine." Jack reassured Alexia, rowing until the longboat until it had dug into the sandy beach inside the cove. Jack stepped out and offered Alexia his hand.

"Come on now, and put your game face on." Jack said with a straight face, Alexia rolled her eyes.

"Piss off." She snarled, Jack nodded.

"That's the ticket." He pulled Alexia along the narrow hallway.

"Okay ." Jack stopped to stare at her wistful smile for a moment before eyeing his surroundings confoundedly.

"I faintly remember you hitting me over the head with an oar in this hallway, luv." Jack touched the wall lightly as Alexia laughed loudly and slapped her hand on his shoulder.

"Nah man. You lost your footing and fell like a toddler just learning how to walk. It was so cute and I was going to help you up but Will wouldn't let me. Said Elizabeth was more important." Alexia lied quickly.

After a moment Jack nodded his head in agreement and pressed on into the huge cavern room. The crew was facing Barbossa who stood at the large treasure chest with Will. He held a jagged knife at Will's next while Jack pushed his way through the crowd.

"Begun by blood…" Barbossa started to say, his hand ready to slit Will's throat. Jack stopped at the edge of a rock, his hand raised in the air trying to get Barbossa's attention. Alexia stood beside him with her arms crossed, the same pirate who had knocked her unconscious back in Port Royal was giving her X-rated looks.

"Jack." She whined pulling on his sleeve, the pirate was moving slowly towards her.

"Excuse me." Jack pointed at Barbossa who was still trying to talk.

"…by blood un-"Barbossa had to stop again when Will struggled to look up and catch Jack's eye.

"Jack!" Will said excitingly, he then looked over and saw Alexia. She gave him a small wave.

"S'not possible." Barbossa gasped almost dropping the jagged knife into the treasure chest. Will smiled.

"Not probable." Jack corrected.

"Look the lady has come to rescue her man!" Barbossa laughed.

"Don't even." Alexia's face hardened into a diamond hard toughness as she spoke. The look alone kept Barbossa and his crew quiet.

"Yes, uh where is Elizabeth?" Will asked Jack but he was staring at Alexia the whole time. She adverted her eyes to a glittery tiara just out of her reach. Praying it would some how move through the air and into her hand, she concentrated on staring at it.

"She's safe, just like I promised. She's all set to marry Norrington, just like Alexia here promised. And you get to die for her, just like you promised. So we're all men of our word really except for Alexia and I guess Elizabeth who are, in fact… women." Jack rambled.

"Shut up! You're next." Barbossa threatened pointing the knife at Jack then leaning in to slit Will's throat again. Alexia held her breath.

"You don't want to be doing that, mate." Jack slightly raised his hand this time but stopped and pulled his hands behind his back. Barbossa looked up and narrowed his eyes at Jack.

"You should listen to him Barbie dear." Alexia agreed.

"No, I really think I do." Barbossa contradicted.

"Your funeral." Jack said cryptically. Alexia nodded eager for Barbossa to listen to the stupid Jack. Barbossa rolled his eyes then slammed the dagger into the side of the chest.

"Why don't I want to be doing it?" Barbossa asked sarcastically. Will, who was still being held down by Barbossa, was trying to get Alexia's attention by smiling like an idiotic penguin. She had to figure out why he liked her so much.

"Well, because," Jack slapped the arm of the pirate holding him back and walked forward closer to Barbossa," because the HMS Dauntless, pride of the Royal Navy, is floating just offshore. Waiting for you."

"Just hear me out, mate. You order your men to row out to the Dauntless. They do what they do best." The crew laughed along filling the room with an awful stench of rotting teeth.

"Robert's your Uncle, Fannie's you Aunt, there you are with two ships. The makings of your very own fleet." Jack stretched his arms out in front of himself as if displaying the make believe fleet. Barbossa leaned back on the chest dreaming about that fleet.

"Course you'll take the grandest as your flagship, and who's argue? But what of the Pearl?" Jack had already made his way to Barbossa side, Alexia floated somewhere behind him. Will twisted in Barbossa's grip in attempt to see her.

"Name me Captain, I'll sail under you colors, I'll give you ten percent of me plunder and you get to introduce yourself as…Commodore Barbossa. Savvy?" Jack bargained but Barbossa saw the strings that were attached.

"I s'pose in exchange, you want me not to kill the whelp." Barbossa stroked his beard.

"Yes." Alexia said too quickly earning her a loving stare from Will.

"Oh damn." She sighed rolling her eyes. Jack gave Alexia a look for her outburst when a mischievous glint crossed her eyes and she snapped her teeth at her like a cat. Jack jumped back out of surprise and turned back to Barbossa.

"No, no, not at all by all means, kill the whelp. Just not yet." Jack said with crazy hand gestures that came close to poking himself in the eye many times.

"Wait to lift the curse until the opportune moment. For instance…" Jack picked a few medallions, "After you've killed Norrington's men…" He threw each coin back one at a time.

"Every…" clink "Last…" clink "One." Jack secretly hid a coin in the scarf around his hand. Will and Alexia see Jack pocket the last coin as Will began to struggle in Barbossa's grip.

"Blink once miss more, blink twice miss less." Alexia said in a singsong voice. Will looked confused until a thought hit him.

"You've been planning this from the beginning. Ever since you learned my name!" Will said outranged. Jack nodded proud of his plan.

"Yeah, pretty much." Jack said still nodding. Barbossa turned to Jack, a hand on his hip like a woman.

"I want fifty percent of your plunder." Barbossa negotiated. Alexia moved forward trying to untie Will's hand.

"Fifteen." Jack eyed Barbossa and Alexia behind him.

"Forty." Alexia pulled at ropes with no use.

"Twenty-five," Jack pointed a finger in Barbossa's face, "And I'll buy you a hat. A really big one… Commodore."

"We have an accord." The main men shook hands on their accord while Alexia moved back to her place beside Will. Jack lost himself in the heat of the moment.

"All hands to the boats!" Barbossa gives Jack a sideways glance. Jack lowered his arms back down to his side.

"Apologies mate. You give the orders." Jack surrendered his none powers. Barbossa looked around the room at all his crewmembers and smiled.

"Gents… take a walk." The crew walked away laughing and acting very zombie like.

"Not to the boats?" Jack questioned. Barbossa shook his head like he had remembered that joke from when the Will had made his terms on the Pearl earlier that day.

* * *

After the cavern emptied Jack started inspecting the goods that were littered about. Alexia sat on a small stepping stone staring at the water ripple as she dropped gold coins into it. Barbossa stood by the chest with a tied Will close by, waiting for his crew to come back. There were only three other pirates in the cavern who posed a threat. Alexia eyed them every now and again, sizing them up. Jack, making a loud racket from his treasure hunting, passed by Alexia and dropped the coveted sapphire adorned tiara on her head. She glared up at Jack while the tiara fell over her one of her eyes.

"Nice." Alexia said sarcastically, letting Jack pull her up from her seat on the stepping stone.

"Saw you eyeing it up so I thought you might want it. Plus you've proved yourself worthy of the name pirate." Alexia clapped her hands and leap up and down. She then beamed at Jack and hugged him forcibly.

"Aww… Jack! You have no idea how happy that makes me. To be a full blown pirate!" Jack spun Alexia around before placing her on back on the ground.

"Do I get a pin or something?" Alexia asked. Jack searched his pockets and pulled out a huge brooch type pin tangled within some gold chains. The pin was bigger than Alexia's fist and had "Pirate" etched in perfect calligraphy with some crazy flower petal designs. She noticed it and raised her eyebrow.

"Here ya go." Jack dropped the necklaces and pin in Alexia's out stretched hand and went on with his hunt.

"Hey Johnny Boy you didn't make this pin did you?" Alexia asked sarcastically, Jack looked around for this Johnny boy before answering her question.

"No, why?" Jack asked confused. Alexia half shrugged.

"Cause its kinda gay." Alexia looked doubtfully at the gold chains then, with a sigh, she started to untangle them. After a few minutes Alexia had three thin gold chains.

"What am I supposed to do with these?" Alexia asked holding up the three chains. Jack turned, squinted at the thin chains, and shrugged.

"Dunno." He confirmed throwing a golden Buddha over his shoulder. Alexia smiled as she ran the gold chains through her fingers. As she pinned the huge pin to the front left side of her shirt she decided she would give the other two chains to Xio and Chelsea.

"If he's so perfect why don't you marry him?" Will mocked quietly from his place next to Barbossa. Alexia's head snapped up and she raised an eyebrow at Will.

"What, are we five again?" She asked heatedly. Will tried to shrug her question off but Barbossa held his arms tightly.

"I know you are but what am I." Will replied with a smart ass smile. Alexia put her tongue behind her teeth and made a clucking noise. She then turned on her heel to Barbossa.

"Hey Barbie. Could I have a word with Will privately? Promise not to do anything!" She joked grabbing Will by his tied hands and leading him to a secluded corner. Barbossa nodded and began talk to Jack about something.

* * *

In their corner Alexia pushed Will against a wall, pressing his face in the rock like her officer father taught her. She then produced a dagger from her boot and cut the ropes binding Will, just enough so they could easily be slipped on and off. After releasing him, Alexia handed the ropes to Will she sat on a small treasure chest infront of him.

"What is up with you Will? Is this because I was bonding with Jack and you were jealous cause you like me?" Alexia asked straight out. Will flinched so badly it seemed like he was having an up right seizure.

"I'm not jealous." Will said trying to be cool to cover up his flinch. Alexia tapped her finger against her chin before nodding.

"Right, but you didn't say you don't like me." Alexia pointed out crossing her arms. Will sighed.

"Well, I do not really know what's going on." Will sat down next to Alexia and proceed to bury his head in his hands. Alexia's patted his shoulder awkwardly.

"Please tell me you're not going to cry or anything." Alexia pleaded making Will laugh.

"It's so hard because you are so amazing." Will muttered. Alexia froze in mid pat.

"Really?" She asked in such a girlish way she could not help but cringe from the outburst. Will smiled.

"Yes. You're strong and more beautiful than you know." Alexia blushed.

"Will don't please. You love Elizabeth remember?" She asked pushing him back Elizabeth but he only had eyes for her, here in this private space.

"Not to mention that sharp tongue you use to get out of any trouble. And you're braver than a good number of men I know. Well most of the time." Will though back to when Alexia had freaked out when she almost drowned.

"Will, stop and think about this okay?" Alexia held a hand up to stop Will from talking.

"You and me," Alexia gestured to Will and herself, "can't happened."

"I mean don't get me wrong or anything you're hot and all but come on. How old are you?" Alexia asked witheringly, eyeing Will up and down to discourage him from lying.

"Twenty." He supplied. Alexia threw her arms in the air.

"Yeah and I'm fifteen. Way to go by the way." Alexia gave him the thumbs up sign before sighing deeply, all the fight whooshing out of her.

"People get married at that age Alexia, to older people all the time. Five years is not that big of a gap." Will tried to reason. Alexia shook her head.

"Not in my era Will. That kind of thing frowned upon most of the time." Alexia sighed again while Will was at a complete loss.

"So what does this mean?" He asked, Alexia thought for a long moment. Handsome pirate right in front of her. Take the bait.

"To hell with it." Alexia smiled slowly. One kiss was not cheating nor did it stir any guilt toward Elizabeth, okay maybe a little but what's life with out taking chance and making mistakes.

"To hell with what?" Will asked uncertainly.

"To lizzie's feelings and to my conscious telling me not to kiss you." Will's went wide.

"Is this a trick?" He asked in a way that any guy given the option would.

"Does it look like I have a black top hat and a white bunny coming out of it?" Alexia lean forward slightly and smirked.

"No." Will had leaned forward, closing the gap between them.

"Then there's your answer. No tricks, no teasing. Now come here." Alexia grabbed the back of his head and pressing her lips on his. In that one moment they seemed to melt into each other. Will put a hand behind Alexia's head while she ran her fingers through his hair. After a minute she very unwillingly moved her hands to Will's board shoulders and pushed until they broke apart.

"As much as I pain to say this we should go." Alexia said promptly standing. She looked down at Will, who seemed unresponsive and a little starry eyed.

"Up and adam pretty boy. Barbie will be wonderin where you are. Come on." Alexia said the last bit in a southern drawl pulling Will to his feet. He shook his head and nodded.

"All right." He followed her back to the pirate gathering. The rest of the gals had to be on their way about now.

* * *

Ooo... I bet you didn't see that coming. Smooch's. Read and Review.


	22. Little Wooden Horsey

Let us see how this little lust fest with Will and Alexia holds out. Also what Princess Liz, Chelsea, and Xio are up to and just how much Chelsea is willing to do to have a little num num. That means food. Right so I have to go stop my rabbit from eating a picture frame, see ya!

**Same spillage different chapter Johnny ain't mine or anyone else's. Disney owns all.**

* * *

As Will and Alexia came ambling back to the pirate brigade, sneaking glances at each other as if playing a coy game, just as Barbossa had struck up a conversation with Jack again.

"I must admit, Jack, I thought I had ye figured." Barbossa chuckled wagging a finger playfully at Jack. He turned to Barbossa still examining a rather spectacularly jeweled statue of a cow.

"That must be from India." Alexia pointed to the statue of a cow. Jack handed the statue off to her so he could turn his full attention to Barbossa.

"But it turns out that you're a hard man to predict." Barbossa continued to wag his finger until Alexia nodded for him to stop. Jack looked taken back and slightly hurt.

"Me?" He pointed to himself.

"I'm just dishonest." Jack had to own up to his deeds.

"And a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly." Jack gestured so wildly that Barbossa was very bemused.

"It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly…" Jack leaned in on the pirate nearest to him and made eye contact with Will. Alexia took the pause to carefully place the cow statue on the floor next to her and leisurely unsheathed her sword.

"… Stupid." Jack unsheathed the pirate's sword, threw it to Will and kicked the stunned weaponless pirate into the shallow water. He then stepped forward to fight with Barbossa. Will broke the weakened ropes and snatched the sword right out of the air.

"Let's go you slimly gits!" Alexia shouted clashing blades with the short pirate that held all the bombs. Will shook his head laughing as his made a slash at his pirate foe. Barbossa and Jack had already shuffled away from the rest of the fray. Their blades caught and they pushed them towards the other.

"You're off the edge of the map, mate." Barbossa sneered at Jack who looked completely terrified in the most dignified way possible.

"Here there be monsters."

* * *

Gently bobbing on the water next to the Black Pearl sat Elizabeth, Xio, and Chelsea watching the Royal Soldiers doing the same. Chelsea looked up at the cannon window and sniffed the air heavily. Xio raised her eyebrows.

"Mmmm…"Chelsea sighed leaning against Xio as if she would pass out from the heavenly smells wafting from the window.

"I could die I'm so hungry." Chelsea whined rubbing her stomach and clawing her way up the side of the Black Pearl. Xio grabbed the waistband of her pants and held them tightly. Elizabeth smiled.

"I do love having girlfriends." She grinned rubbing her hands together.

"Time to go on deck."

As the girls scaled the Black Pearl using only bent forks attached to their hands, pretty effective actually, they came across the canon window that two pirate guards were sitting by. Chelsea tried her best to resist the temptation to bust through the window and inhaling some of that delicious cake and beef but it was a losing battle. Xio had to snap her fingers and pat her thigh to catch her attention, like a dog. Chelsea looked up to see Elizabeth and Xio far ahead of her.

"But…" Chelsea began but Xio cut her off.

"Absolutely not." Xio hissed. Chelsea sighed in a defeated manner and continued to climb until she was just above the window. Elizabeth noticed Chelsea's standstill. She leaned back to glare down at her.

"Chelsea let's go!" She whispered urgently trying to grab Chelsea's hand and pull her up. Chelsea gave her a mysterious look before digging the forks on her hands deeper into the ships side.

"Make me." Chelsea said dangerously serious before swinging herself into the canon room. The pirate guards stared shocked as Chelsea had to limbo the rest of the way into in canon window. After she was through, though, she perused the table of food goods with glee.

"Oh yes! Jackpot!" Chelsea yelled digging her fingers into the wedding type cake and stuffing her face. The two pirates, shaking off their frozen state, rose to a standing position carefully ready to bludgeon Chelsea. She looked them up and down.

"Up and out." Chelsea smiled wickedly.

When Elizabeth and Xio managed to climb back down to the window the two pirate guard went flying through it. They screamed and yelled in unmanly ways changing into skeletons before the hit the water with a splash. Xio and Elizabeth shared a horrified look. They then looked into the window, one on each side, and meet the sight of Chelsea's back as she hunched over the table snatching up bits of food and slapping empty plates to the floor. She seemed more like a wild animal than anything else.

"Chelsea, are you okay?" Xio asked a little afraid. Chelsea turned around slowly, her cheeks bugled and there was a beef tip hanging from her crammed mouth.

"Chelsea hungry so Chelsea ate foooooodd…" Chelsea said in a creepy giant who doesn't speak English type voice. Elizabeth cringed.

"Eww. I take back what I said earlier." Elizabeth stuck her tongue out, disgusted. Xio winced.

"Yeah I would too." Xio put a leg through the small window.

"Oh well. Let's go get Mr. Gibbs and the rest of the crew." Xio said walking by the table Chelsea was couching on and snagging a beef tip. She munched happily on it while Elizabeth almost fell into the sea when she lost her balance and got her foot caught in between the table and the wall. When she finally managed to get though the small window she joined Xio.

"Yes, let's." Elizabeth put her hand out as if the urge Xio forward. She nodded and kicking the door open leading lower into the hold. Chelsea didn't follow.

"Mr. Gibbs!" Xio screamed putting a hand to her ear listening for his call.

"Xio?" Mr. Gibbs said reluctantly.

"Got him!" Xio punched the air before stampeding down the stairs like a pack of wildebeest to go unlock the cage the crew was stuck in.

* * *

Barbossa and Jack chased each other around the cave fighting fiercely while Alexia worked with Will to cut down the other three pirates. She noticed how Will fought with lighting fast and perfect form while Jack used everything from his blade to the objects around him to stay alive. Alexia still managed to catch some of the conversation between Jack and Barbossa.

"You can't beat me, Jack." Barbossa said simply when Jack cornered him on a slightly raised rock in the middle of the cave. Alexia threw the large solid gold cow at a pirate chasing her causing him to fall to the ground immediately. She caught the scene of Jack impaling Barbossa, roughly. Jack look confused as Barbossa sighed, took out the sword, and stabbed Jack through the chest. Alexia gasped and rushed forward only remembering that Jack was undead when he staggered into a beam of moonlight. His clothes dissolved and his bones shone bright in the moonbeam.

"That's interesting." Jack said in awe as he inspected his skeleton hand. He then reveal the medallion he had taken and flipped it through his finger bones.

"I couldn't resist, mate." He explained as Barbossa stood staring at him, dumbfounded. Jack pounced forward and attacked Barbossa. That is until Barbossa got the upper hand and sent Jack racing threw a small arch in the rock and upsetting an end table.

"Sorry!" Jack yelled still running from Barbossa and knocking down more treasure.

"Alexia!" Will yelled as the pirate she had knocked out came to and was fighting him at an uneven three against one. Alexia grabbed the nearest object around her, a golden scepter with a variety of gems embedded in it, and moved toward the tree pirates swinging like there was no tomorrow. When the scepter made contact, with a sickening crack, Alexia squeezed her eyes shut and groaned.

"Eww! Oh my holy lord and savoir! Xio and Chelsea have got to be having a better time than I am!" Alexia cried dropping her specter and doing her "gross ew ew ew!" dance. Will gave her a look.

"Oh come on Alexia. You got two with one hit. It was a good swing. Plus Xio and Chelsea do not have to deal with undead… things." Will rolled his eyes as he threw a golden vase over the remaining pirates' head and started banging on it annoyingly. One of the two pirates Alexia had sticked in the head stood unsteadily, rubbing his head gingerly.

"Will bend forward!" Alexia smiled that wicked smile of hers. Will did as he was told while Alexia ran towards him and used his back to hoist herself into the air. She then delivered a powerful ninja kick to the chest of the already hurting pirate. When he went down Alexia completed the kick with a perfect couched landing. After making sure the pirate wouldn't rise again Alexia jumped up and did a bit of a jig.

"That was so cool! I thought that move only worked in the movies!" Alexia shrieked happily running and jumping in Will's strong arms, bridal style so he could swing her in circles. He craned his neck so he could kiss her ever so softly.

"You just have to ruin the moment with your adorability don't you?" Alexia commented vaguely, wriggling out of his arms so retrieve her specter. Though Will could still see her cheeks burn but what he didn't see was Jack narrowing his eyes at him.

* * *

"Die you stupid thing! DIE!" Xio screamed wrapping her hands tighter around the undead monkey's throat and shaking it violently.

"Xio that's animal abuse." Chelsea pointed out wrapping a rope around her arm. They would use the rope to grapple down to their awaiting rowboat.

"Shouldn't we get the rest of the crew to help us?" Elizabeth asked tying a grapple to the end of Chelsea's rope. Xio threw the monkey into a cloth sack and held in tight.

"Can it breathe in there?" Chelsea asking gesturing to the bag, Xio shrugged.

"Who cares, it's already dead. And if this thing about saving Will doesn't work out then we have leverage." Xio smiled evilly shaking the sack. She was seeking revenge from a few minutes earlier when the monkey had jumped out and screeched in her face. After recovering from the mild heart attack and wiping the monkey spit from her cheek she swore vengeance.

"Miss Elizabeth!" Mr. Gibbs waved at Elizabeth from the stairs as the crew filed onto the deck.

"Ahh, Mr. Gibbs have you come to help us?" Elizabeth smiled brightly but Mr. Gibbs adverted his eyes.

"Any port in the storm." Cotton's parrot cawed from its place on his shoulder.

"Phssssawwww…" Chelsea sighed exasperatingly.

"Ya'll bitches can go back to the hull if you ain't gonna help us!" Xio yelled irritably securing the grapple to the railing of the Pearl and throwing the length of rope overboard. It barely touch the bottom their escape vessel. Elizabeth shook her head in disbelief.

"Of course they'll help, right Mr. Gibbs?" Elizabeth asked desperately. She was starting to doubt she and the other girls could handle the situation. The more the merrier!

"Cotton's right, we've got the Pearl now Elizabeth." Mr. Gibbs gestured to the ship he was free to commandeer as Chelsea wrapped a piece of torn cloth around her hand.

"Yeah, whatevs grandpas. Like we need your help anyways, old geezer." Chelsea muttered under her breath while she climbed over the railing and slid down the rope like she was in the freakin Matrix. Xio grabbed the rope next.

"Let's go Elizabeth their obviously in this for themselves." Xio said sarcastically.

"But… but what about Jack? He is your Captain, right?" Elizabeth asked not accepting to truth of Mr. Gibbs' selfishness.

"Jack owes us a ship." The midget voiced, Xio cut daggers at him with her eyes.

"Yeah, and I owe you a punt kick over the side of this ship. I'll see you later." Xio saluted the midget and jumped over the edge sliding down to the waiting rowboat.

"And there's the code to consider." Mr. Gibbs agreed petting his beard.

"That's Bull right there, that is!" Xio shouted from below. Chelsea cheered.

"The code? YOU'RE PIRATES FOR CHRISTS SAKE!" Elizabeth yelled throwing her arms in the air in anger.

"Hang the code, and hang the rules! Their more like guidelines anyhow." Elizabeth tried to reason but she still ended up on the rowboat with just Chelsea and Xio rowing quietly to the cove.

"Bloody pirates." She muttered crossing her arms.

"You said it sister." Chelsea shrugged her shoulders in a sign of "what can you do about it".

* * *

A bit crazy but that's how life is sometimes. That's what makes it so fun. Anyhoo go ahead a review if you read. Oh and happy summer.


	23. Weighting The Options

WOOHOO! Summer is here baby! Anyhoo back to the story. So the battle is almost over and Jack's team is winning. But there's a twist. Someone gets shot and it's not Barbossa. Not to mention a hat made out of a jacket and a metal snapshot? Is this making any sense to you? Goodie.

**DON"T OWN PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN**

**DO OWN THE RIGHT TO WRITE ABOUT THEM**

* * *

Alexia and Will were shoulder to shoulder, behind them somewhere a pirate ran past with a golden spittoon on his head. The other two pirates advanced on the couple. Between them Alexia and Will faced the crazed pirates with two pistols, two swords, a specter, and a dagger and they were feeling lucking.

"I'm gonna teach you two the meaning of pain!" The pirate yelled even though he and his comrade were out armed and out skilled.

"Do you like pain?" A voice behind the pirate said. When he turned Elizabeth smashed him in the face with a heavy staff. Alexia's back stiffened as she caught sight of the princess.

"Try wearing a corset." Elizabeth snarled offering Will the other side of her staff.

"Oh shiitake mushrooms and soy sauce!" Alexia shouted moving away from Will slowly. Xio and Chelsea noticed her minute actions and winked at her.

"Hey sista. What did you get onto to when we were away?" Xio asked smirking like crazy.

"And we mean that in every sense of the word." Chelsea wagged her eyebrows at Alexia who cringed.

"First of all Chelsea, you look like a homicidal maniac when you do that." Alexia snapped, putting Chelsea back into her place.

"And second of all, nothing happened!" Alexia protested.

"You okay Will?" Elizabeth asked lovingly stroking his hand as he moved to stand next to her.

"I am now." Will responded with the same starry-eyed look. They hugged but Will look over at Alexia with a wink and a smile. Alexia rolled her eyes while Chelsea and Xio shared a look.

"Ooo… Alexia what did you do?" Chelsea asked half whispering. Over Will's shoulder Elizabeth caught sight of Jack clashing blades with Barbossa.

"What side is Jack on?" Elizabeth asked pushing Will away and pointing to the skeletal Jack. She shook her head in disbelief as Jack's body changed form in and out of the moonlight to the same undead look all the other pirates in the cave were sporting. Alexia half shrugged her shoulders.

"Hard to tell sometimes." She admitted Chelsea punched her in the shoulder.

"Spillage, now." She pushed but Alexia just smiled.

"Later." She hissed out of the corner of her mouth.

"At the moment?" Will answered his lady. When the three pirates finally came to again and decided to attack Will and the four girls, they were ready.

"Shake and Bake!" Chelsea, Xio, and Alexia shouted at the same time knocking knuckles and kicking the three pirates until they were on their backs screaming for mercy.

"Give us liberty or give us death!" One shouted. Alexia nodded in agreement.

"Very well then, I order for you three: Death by Kabob." Alexia and Xio arranged the pirates in a line while Elizabeth and Chelsea lifted the heavy staff and skewered the three. One they were stuck together Chelsea pulled out an old fashioned bomb from the Russian looking pirates' pocket.

"Thanks." She said politely as Alexia struck a match across Will's cheek and handed it to her.

"There you are madam."

"Bombs away!" Xio shouted covering her ears.

Chelsea light the fuse of the bomb, jammed it into the chest cavity of the short black haired Russian looking pirate and shoved them out of the moonlight so their bodies went back to normal. The pirate freaked and frantically started clawing at his chest trying to get at the bomb. He looked up desperately.

"No fair!" He whined before the three pirates exploded.

"That…just…happened!" Alexia and Chelsea shouted high fiving each other with both hands.

"Aww yeah boy!" Chelsea said the last bit in a high pitched voice. Xio and Will raced up a mountain of treasure up to the chest. After one good push the lid went crashing down the side of the treasure pile.

"Jack your up!" Xio yelled waving her hands over her head. Jack nodded and threw off Barbossa with a flick of his wrist. When Barbossa fell back Jack squeeze a hand around his blade and tossed the bloody medallion to Will, who was positioned beside the chest. In the chaos Barbossa realized he was doomed and looked for someone else to take down with him. Alexia, Chelsea, and Elizabeth were stepping quickly over the stepping stones when Barbossa took aim.

"Alexia!" Jack shouted reaching out to her but by the time she looked up a shot rang out in the small cave. Chelsea screamed as Alexia collapsed backwards into a small water outlet. Elizabeth gasped and put a hand to her mouth not believing her eyes. Will's face crumpled. Xio ran forward to crouch in front of her sister. Jack's eyes flashed as he whipped out his gun and shot Barbossa in the heart.

"Bastard." He hissed as smoke furled around the mouth of his pistol. Barbossa's laugh echoed on the high ceilings.

"Ten years you carry that pistol, and now you waste your shot." Barbossa laughed evilly.

"And worst you waste it on a poor innocent girly's life too." Barbossa gestured to Alexia cradled in Xio arms. Her eyes fluttered open and she leapt up to karate kick Barbossa in the face.

"Suck on that you Mexican apple thief!" She shouted victoriously with her hands on her hips. The pirate pin pinned to her chest was dented from the place the bullet had hit. Chelsea and Xio cheered tear streaming down their faces.

"Woo! That's my sister!" Xio hollered while Chelsea put two fingers in her mouth and whistled.

"How do you do that?" Alexia asked wonderingly as if everyone in the cave had not been sniffling at her death just minutes before.

"He didn't waste it." Will announced as everyone turn to him. The sleeve of his shirt stretched over his extended arm like a wing as he dropped both bloody medallions into the chest. Time seemed to slow as the medallions bounced on the surface of the treasure and Will revealed the cut on his hand. It was all over.

Barbossa dropped his sword and stumbled back onto a pile of treasure behind him. He ripped open his vest to expose his wound and the blood that was spreading from it.

"I feel…" Barbossa eyes widened at how his feelings all came rushing back to him. "Cold."

Barbossa fell back dead, an apple rolling from his hand. The curse was now lifted so Alexia took the moment to take Barbossa's apple and bite into it.

"Eww, sour apple." She whined spiting out the apple and throwing it onto Barbossa's jacket pocket.

"All's well that ends well." Xio stated sifting through the treasure she wanted to take with her. Chelsea was already wear a several gaudy necklaces and rings while Jack grabbed the crown nearest to him and put it on.

"Loot! LOOT!" Jack yelled happily snatching up necklaces and other goods to throw to the crowd, which consisted of only Xio and Chelsea. Alexia slowly ambled up the treasure pile to where Will was standing.

"You have good timing." Will commented and Alexia shrugged.

"No biggie." Alexia looked down at Elizabeth. She was standing all alone and watching Chelsea try to crowd surf with just Xio as the crowd.

"If you're waiting for the most opportune moment… now would be it." Alexia fingered the gold coins in the chest as Will stared at her not knowing what she meant.

"Go to her." Alexia gestured to Elizabeth smirking slightly at Will's hesitates.

"No, I don't want to." Will crossed his arms.

"Make me." He dared quietly raising his eyebrows.

"Don't make me hurt you Will. Either you can go with dignity or I can kick you down this treasure pile and laugh as you fall at her feet." Alexia smiled devilishly, sneaking her hand into her back pocket. As soon as her fingers were free the lid of the chest slammed shut, all on its own. Alexia stared down at the lid.

"Okay." Will said worried for his safety, skipping like a little fairy boy down to Elizabeth. She immediately brightened up and started chatting Will up.

"Hey Alexia! We're going now so come on!" Xio shouted waving a very bejeweled hand. Chelsea was pimped out with a cane and everything. She had even fashioned a pimp hat out of the remains of Jack's coat.

"Hey, look at my hat!" Chelsea flaunted the hat around like a sombrero.

"Smooth, like sandpaper." Alexia slid down the treasure pile with the skill of a surfer from California, grabbing hand fulls of necklaces, earrings, and rings which she proceed to wear. She then linked arms with the two girls and walked through the narrow halls of the cove.

"So, what's up with Will. He's acting totally weird. Not to mention he can not play cool to save his life." Xio said in a preppy tone. Alexia rolled her eyes.

"Nothing. Just had a moment is all." Chelsea nodded.

"Yeah like when I went to this café one day and I ran out of napkins so I asked the guy beside me for some and we had the most wonderful date ever." Chelsea sighed heavenly.

"Well, did you ever see him again?" Alexia asked uncertainly. Chelsea thought for a moment.

"Nah. Why?" She asked.

"I don't think that was a date." Xio replied.

"So was." Chelsea argued.

"Did you know his name?" Alexia asked concerned about Chelsea dating habits.

"No." There was a pause.

"Then there's your answer." Alexia smiled again. The hallway then opened and they entered the small watery cove area. Ahead of them stood Will with Elizabeth surgically attached to his side like an unwelcome out growth.

"Now," Jack said pompously as he came waltzing over to the group, "If you'll be so kind, I'd be much obliged if you'd drop me off by my ship."

Will held his arm outs inviting the gang to pile into the smallish rowboat. Xio and Chelsea had to spilt a seat at one end of the boat while Alexia and Jack took the other end. Will and Elizabeth sat together in the middle, which meant Will had to look over his shoulder if he wanted to talk to Alexia. Jack nudged Alexia in the ribs gently.

"Now that I have my ship back how would you like to come sailing with me? I'll show you Singapore. You'll love it." He inquired; Will twisted in his seat slightly to hear her answer. Alexia pushed him back around and motioned to the paddles.

"You and Elizabeth better get to work. This boat ain't going to move itself." Alexia instructed.

"You might even get matching blisters, how romantic." Chelsea cooed, Xio snorted with laughter. Alexia folded her arms behind her head.

"Thanks but no thanks Jack. You're not exactly the best pirate in the world. Your too good of a man to be a good pirate. Am I not right in my assumptions?" Alexia half smiled at Jack's resentment to her comment. She fiddling with her pirate pin and unclipped it from her shirt.

"Aye ye are." Jack admitted wrapping an arm around Alexia's shoulder and looking to the stars. To his and Will's surprise she didn't reel away from Jack's touch, she just leaned back and enjoyed the view. Chelsea and Xio were now a carrying the pirate tune Elizabeth had taught them on the beach. Alexia nodded her head in time with the tune.

"And that's okay. You did a great job back in that cave. I saw your face when Barbossa shot me, you were pissed. And if it weren't for your pin I'd be dead. It saved my life." Alexia reassured Jack, offering back the dented pin. Will snorted his disapprove and Alexia kicked the oar out of his hand.

"On the other hand," Jack rubbed his hands together, thinking up something, "maybe I'm a man who can't pass up a chance for revenge against the black hearted bastard who stole my ship and left me to die in the middle of the ocean twice! And who knows how to get what he wants. Now that's a great pirate."

"Yeah…maybe." Alexia said skeptically patting Jack's knee to give the false impression that she believed what he had just said. As the longboat made it through the mouth of the cavern and out to open sea Elizabeth took a quick look around to see if Mr. Gibbs and his crew had really left Jack behind. Will kept on rowing looking for the Black Pearl too.

"Hey Jack. Where's your boat?" Will asked. Chelsea held a hand over her eyes searching for the boat.

"Sorry Jack looks like they made like a banana and spilt." Xio observed, Alexia started laughing.

"Hold on a sec. I just want to get a mental picture of your total humiliation." Alexia made camera with her index fingers and her thumbs. She aimed the lense at Jack's flabbergasted face.

"Click." She pretended to press the capture button and admired the imaginary picture in the box.

"Got it. That's gonna look so good next to Xio sleeping on the train to Florida with carrots up her nose."

"I'm so sorry Jack." Elizabeth apologized as she gave Alexia a look for her rudeness.

"Ooo. Let me see!" She demanded sarcastically, shifting her weight so the boat rocked dangerously from side to side.

"Chelsea you better stop that right this minute or else." Xio warned but luckily the longboat had glide up right beside the Dauntless. Norrington let down a rope ladder for them to climb up.

"You'll never guess where I found this Elizabeth." Norrington narrowed his eyes at his fiancée.

"Ouch." The girls sucked in a breath as if they had just burned themselves with a hot cookie.

* * *

Wonder what'll happen between Will and Alexia. My, my... anyhoo review. Last chapter is up now!


	24. Final Goodbyes and A Little Cliff Diving

YES! Vacation rules big time. I just slept until three in the afternoon. Of course I couldn't fall asleep until five in the morning the day after but you have to take the good with the bad. That and scrambled eggs at three in the afternoon. Yeah so here's the hanging scene and the escape suicide jump. Not to mention some fancy dresses and final goodbyes.

**DoN't OwN PiRaTeS oF tHe CaRiBbEaN This will be the last time I type this.**

* * *

The Dauntless finally ported in Port Royal late that evening. The girls traipsed off the ship cheering tiredly and kneeling so they could kiss the weathered wood of the dock.

"Thank Jesus we're finally here and off that rickety death trap!" Alexia shouted pulling her bag higher onto her shoulder. Chelsea and Xio were just about to break out into a rousing chorus of "A Pirates Life For Me".

Norrington, Elizabeth, Will, and Jack, being watched by half the guards on the Dauntless, came down the gilly plank to join the girls. Alexia yawned widely starting a chain reaction through out the group.

"What's up next Commodore?" Alexia asked shaking from her big yawn.

"You will join Miss Elizabeth in her home and sleep. Tomorrow we will all attend a hanging." Norrington replied covering his mouth as he yawned.

"What hanging?" Chelsea asked unthinkingly, finger combing her bed head.

"Mr. Sparrow has a dawn appointment with the gallows." Norrington nodded to Gillette and his men. They clapped some irons on Jack hands.

"Ah well. See you at dawn then." Alexia walked up to Jack kissed him full on the mouth. Xio, who was busy trying to support Chelsea, did not see her sister making out with Jack but Will sure did. He furrowed his brows trying to hold himself back from beating Jack into a pulp. Alexia smiled before breaking the toe curling kiss and patted Jack's cheek. His eyes were filled with lust as he wished he wasn't restrained so he could get his hands on the little vixen.

"Good night Jack. We shall be at your hanging. All the best." She waved her hand and headed to a near by carriage. Xio was dragged an unhelpfully drowsy Chelsea to the carriage while Will offered to carry her.

"What, that's it?" Jack questioned angry they were not trying harder to save him after all he had done for them. He wrestled the guards grip as Alexia turned to him.

"I said all the best Jack." She smiled and winked at him, "You'll be fine as long as the bird perches on the flag pole."

The girls were driven to Elizabeth's manor and put to bed quickly as they got rowdy and irritated. Will resigned to his humble adobe while Jack was hauled off to jail and left him to contemplate what exactly is was that Alexia had been talking about.

* * *

Before dawn could break over the town of Port Royal the girls were rudely awakened by Estrella. Xio willingly rolled out of bed and went to pull the sheets off of Chelsea. She cringed into a small ball clutching at her pillows, her eyes shut tightly.

"WHY??" She asked groggily. Estrella and Elizabeth wrestled with Alexia who denied them the privilege to pull off her sheets.

"Go away!" She groaned, groping around blindly for something to throw at the two. When she found the pitcher resting on her bedside table Estrella put a hand on Elizabeth's shoulder to stop her.

"Maybe we should wait." She said wearily a spot on the back of her head throbbing a bit. Elizabeth pursed her lips.

"No." She pulled one last time and this time Alexia let go of the sheets.

"All right already." She hissed sitting up and stretching. Estrella reentered the room with three more maids. Each maid was holding a fancy looking frilly dress. Chelsea squealed with delight while Xio snorted.

"What have you got for us?" Alexia asked rubbed the last of the sleep from her eyes. Estrella held up a baby blue dress and a little matching white hat.

"We have brought you dresses. But first you must bathe." She smiled. The next few minutes were filled with gripes and complaints as the girl bathed in a wash tub with luke warm water and smelly French wash products. The real drama started when the girls were being tied into their corsets.

"No!" Xio screamed as she kicked and pounded her fists on the ground, Alexia stood a few feet away helping Chelsea tighten her corset.

"Xio get up now!" Elizabeth roared chasing her around her room as she streaked through the room with only a bathing suit on. Chelsea pulled a pale pink dress over her own head.

"Come on Mexican beyotch! Suck it up and let's go." Chelsea snapped trying to grab her friend but she darted away from her hands and flashed under the bed. Alexia shook her head in front of the mirror, tousling her curls. She had chosen to wear the baby blue dress with white lace trim Estrella had offered. It made her feel like Scarlet O'Hara from Gone with the Wind. A southern bell with charm, fashion sense, and a trail of men drooling after her leading all the way down to Georgia.

"Don't suppose you have any perfume or," Alexia searched Elizabeth's bureau, "any… never mind. I found some thing."

Elizabeth glared at Alexia her quick finger inspecting each bottle and jar of assorted make up, perfume, and hair products.

"Alexia, please come help me with your stubborn sister." Elizabeth gritted her teeth. Alexia sniffed a fragile bottle of perfume before spraying herself with it.

"If she doesn't want to come clothed then let her come naked. You can't make Xio do anything she doesn't want to." Alexia smiled pulling out an emerald green dress from a box on the chair next to her and shaking it in front of the space underneath the wide bed.

"If I shake it is it more tempting?" Alexia asked crouched down beside the gap between the floor and the bed. Xio's smiled glowed in the dark light.

"Mmm." She purred snatching the dress and pulling it under. Elizabeth marveled at Alexia's tactics.

"Will she put on the dress now?" She asked but she got her answer when Xio came from underneath the bed with her corset tied, dress on, and hair brushed.

"Yep, but you got to make her want to." Alexia clarified.

"Got it." She said breezing through the door leaving a mystified Elizabeth in her wake.

"But… how did she… what?" Elizabeth stared at Xio back completely dust free even though dust bunnies had colonized in the dim space. Alexia patted Elizabeth's shoulder comfortingly.

"Don't worry. She's mystery to us all. "Alexia dawdled before hooking arms with Chelsea and leading her downstairs to their awaiting carriage.

* * *

The day was just beginning and it was a scorcher as Elizabeth, Xio, Alexia, and Chelsea stood at attention. Their gaze set toward the gallows of the Fort's courtyard that stood before them. In a flurry of excitement the whole town had turned out to watch the hanging of the Captain himself. The yard stood silent as an official climbed up a platform to read a proclamation held tightly in his grasp. Alexia shook her head.

"This is so ridonkulous." She whispered to Chelsea who nodded in agreement.

"Yeah and so are these dresses." Chelsea complained pulling at her securely drawn corset. Xio twitched unnervingly.

"I can smell the anticipation." She said scratching her neck and fidgeting. Alexia looked her over worriedly.

"You okay Xio. You look like you just did a line." Alexia wrapped an arm around her sister, a concerned look in her eye. Chelsea smiled.

"Decoy dummy." She mumbled vaguely. Alexia raised an eyebrow at her as the drums started up.

"Jack Sparrow…" The official began but Alexia raised her hand.

"It's Captain Jack Sparrow sir. Please let that be known." She shouted, the crowd turned to investigate who had disrupted the reading. The Commodore smiled and gestured for them to turn back towards the gallows. He gave Alexia a look for barging in on the reading and trying to stall the hanging. The official squirmed shamelessly at Alexia's correction.

"Carry on with it then." She conducted with a wave of her hand. Jack caught her eye and nodded in thanks. If he was going to die he might as well be called by his proper identity.

"Captain Jack Sparrow," The official started again looking to Alexia for another interruption but when she sighed impassively he continued, "Be it known you have…"

Elizabeth stood between her father and her future husband, also shaking her head.

"Alexia's right. This is wrong." She insisted.

"On so many levels." Alexia piped up searching the crowd for Will's enormous hat with its decorative white and brown feather.

"Commodore Norrington is bound by the law ladies." The Governor reminded acting as father to all the girls. Chelsea sneezed noisily.

"Oh, sorry. I'm allergic to bull shit." She stated curtly turning her attention back to the hanging. Governor Swann gasped at her scandalous comment and Elizabeth tried to cover up her laugh with a hacking cough. Alexia and Xio shared a look and started snickering.

"...impersonating an officer of the Spanish Royal Navy, impersonating a cleric of the

Church of England..."

"Ah yes." Jack smiled smugly and laughed a little at remembrance of that day. He looked to the executioner who glared at him until his smiled promptly disappeared.

"...sailing under false colors, arson, kidnapping, looting, poaching, brigandage, pilfering, depravity, depredation, and general lawlessness."

"He's done all that?" Chelsea asked in a disbelieving tone.

"Absolutely. He's even got the scars to show it. Good man and a good pirate until the end." Alexia boasted spotting Will walking towards the picnic group in their raised and shady hidey-hole in the side of the Fort.

"And for these crimes you have been sentenced to be, on this day, hung by the neck until dead. May God have mercy on your soul."

The drums continued as Will stopped in front of Elizabeth. Alexia noticed Cotton's parrot and nudged Xio in the ribs. She gestured to it and Xio pointed it out to Chelsea.

"Swann. Commodore. Girls. Elizabeth." Will paused his voice racked with emotions, "I should have told you this every day since the moment I met you."

The girls huddled around Elizabeth waiting on baited breath to hear what Will was going to say.

"I love you." He said breathlessly, all the girls sighed lovingly. He then turned on a heel just as the executioner placed a noose around Jack's neck. Chelsea poked Elizabeth in the back and pointed to a parrot resting on a flagpole across the courtyard. Elizabeth recognized it as Cotton's parrot.

"We need a distraction Lizzie. You're on." She whispered as she, Alexia, and Xio moved forward and into the crowd. The Commodore noticed Will's haste to the gallows. Elizabeth looked round anxiously but the girls were gone in the crowd.

"I can't breath!" She gasped falling backwards into the raised platform. The Commodore turned to assist her while the governor fanned his daughter with his hat. The drums and chaos struck up as Will pushed his way through the crowd. He noticed the girls close behind.

"We got your back!" Xio gave him the thumbs up as she and Chelsea ran off, knocking down any guard in their path. Alexia stayed Will.

"Let's get this show on the road." She said pushing aside scared townspeople as the gallows' platform gave way and Jack dropped. Will still managed to throw his sword as Jack fell through, giving him a foothold as Will fought his way up the gallows' stairs. Alexia snatched up Jack's cutlass and stomped up the stairs, having to hold her dress all the way.

"Hey! That's mine!" Jack whine as he wobbled on the sword blade that was keeping him alive while Will and the executioner fought in between him almost slashing him a few times.

"Shut it Jack we're trying to save you, you unappreciative dirt for brains pirate." Alexia said sweetly dashing across the gallows, avoiding the fight between Will and the executioner, and cutting Jack loose. Xio and Chelsea stood a few feet away tying ten guards up behind the gallows. Alexia signaled to them.

"Let's go!" She shouted jumping from the gallows and running toward the opening archways that led to the cliff in which Elizabeth had fallen early that week.

Chelsea nodded and Xio saluted as they ran to the archways with Will and Jack right behind them. Will pushed the executioner off the gallows and right into the Commodores lap as Jack cut his bindings on the sword stuck in the wood.

The two men fought their way up the grand stairs, tripping up guards with Jack's noose rope and smashing them against walls. But when they circled around a pillar Norrington's men cornered them. Will spun hastily looking for a way out of the circle of guns with Jack back to back with him. When Will finally faced the Commodore and the Governor he lowered his weapon slightly. Jack, right behind him, blew the feather of Will's hat from his face and turned to peer at the Commodore over his shoulder.

"I thought we might have to endure some manner of ill-conceived escape attempt but not from you." Norrington lectured Will who looked as if he could have cared less. The Governor and Elizabeth came up behind Norrington.

"On our return to Port Royal, I granted you clemency. And this is how you thank me?" The Governor asked disappointed and angry.

"By throwing in your lot with him?" The Governor gestured to Jack with disgust, "He's a pirate!"

"And a good man" Will finally dropped his sword. Jack, behind his back, points to himself proudly and mouthed, "That's me." The guards are unamused and raise their muskets a little higher to make Jack stop.

"If all I have achieved here is that the hangman will earn two pairs of boots instead of one, so be it. At least my conscience will be clear." Will said self righteously. Norrington furrowed his eyebrows.

"You forget you place, Turner." Norrington hissed.

"No I haven't. It's right here…," Will smiled successfully, "It's right here between you and Jack."

Elizabeth unfortunately sees Will as the brave pirating man she loves and steps towards him.

"As is mine." She announced latching onto Will's arm and glaring down her father.

"Elizabeth!" He shouted outranged at the turn of events," Lower your weapons. For goodness' sake put them down!"

The guards lower their weapons uncertainly. Norrington looks at Elizabeth, crushed as a slow clap took up. Everyone turn to the ledge where the girls stood on the battlement. Alexia stood tall in between Xio and Chelsea.

"Beautifully done. Ah a lover for a lie." Alexia wiped imaginary tears from her eyes.

"So this is where you heart truly lies then?" Norrington asked in dismay, a bit teary eyed himself.

Elizabeth took a moment to answer but when looked in Will's eyes she knew, "It is."

"Come on now Jack. We've got a boat to catch. Say your goodbyes." Xio pointed to Cottons parrot that had taken flight and was now flying overhead.

"Well! I'm actually feeling rather good about this." He turned to Governor Swann.

"I think we've all arrived at a very special place, eh?" Jack leaned forward invading the Governors personal space. "Spiritually...Ecumenically...Grammatically?"

The Governor made a sickened face when Jack breathed on him. Not noticing Jack moved to Norrington with the same ignorance to a person's bubble.

"I want you to know that I was rooting for you, mate. Know that." Jack backed away from the Commodore slowly pointing at him. He raced to the battlement where Alexia stood waiting, her hand out.

"Last call for cliff diving team Eagle." Xio shouted Chelsea grabbed her hand.

"Hold my hand!" She whined as Xio wrestled her grip. Jack looked to Alexia.

"You had this all planned." He accused but Alexia just smiled.

"Since the beginning I'm afraid." She admitted with a shrug of her shoulder.

"I like the way that dress fits you." Jack eyed Alexia put up a fist to punch him. He flinched like always.

"Two for flinching." She smirked punching him twice in the arm, kindly.

The guards moved forward, the muskets rose again to capture Jack and the girls.

"Friends! This is the day that you will always remember as the day that-"But before Jack could finish Alexia pushed him over the battlement. Unfortunately he managed to grab her arm on the way down.

"Jack!" She shouted angrily grabbing Xio and Chelsea's by the collar and taking them down with her. Chelsea's screams cut the air as Xio cursed up a storm. Alexia could feel Jack's hand leave her arm and everything disappeared into a black cloud. When they hit the water the girls didn't sink. They had landed on the old weathered couch on their large patio at their beach house. All three girls looked around confused.

"What happened?" Chelsea asked touching the bathing suit that had just been a full length dress. Alexia shook her head.

"I don't think we were meant to stay." She reasoned searching the pockets of her shorts. She pulled out three thin gold chains with a golden medallion on each. Xio and Chelsea smiled.

"You didn't." Xio said reaching for the golden chain Alexia was offering to her and Chelsea.

"I did. It's so we can always remember the adventure." Alexia brought the chain over her head and shivered when the cold medallion touched her chest.

"Cool." Chelsea cheered helping Xio clip her necklace. Alexia turned to the TV just as the Will and Elizabeth kissed. The camera panned out and turned to Jack being heaved on board the Black Pearl.

"Well how about some Chinese?" Chelsea offered as the end credits rolled up the screen and the Pirate Anthem belted from the stereos, shaking the end table the TV rested on. Xio reached for her cars keys on the coffee table.

"Sure." Alexia nodded looking on the floor for something.

"Where's the remote?" She asked worriedly when she came up empty handed.

* * *

After the kiss Elizabeth excused herself to go talk to her father and left Will to watch the Black Pearl sail away into the sunset. He looked down and noticed something on the battlement. It was the remote Alexia had asked him to hold for her on the Pearl. He picked it up cautiously.

"Ready to go dear?" Elizabeth called beckoning him with her hand. Will nodded.

"Coming." He pocketed the remote and went to join his soon to be wife.

* * *

I wonder why that remote remained behind? Alexia must have dropped it when Jack pulled her over the edge. Anyways. Enjoy your summer and look for the second edition.


End file.
